FMLs submitted from Belgium

Today, I found out my father's girlfriend is moving in with us. I didn't even know he had a girlfriend. FML

by MissMoonpie / 08/27/2016 at 8:21am / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boss refused my resignation and acted like nothing had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 07/18/2016 at 7:51am / Belgium / Work

Today, my grandma told everyone I'm using steroids and amphetamines, all because she mistook my protein powder and vitamin pills for drugs. FML

by Pelly / 06/23/2016 at 6:26am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Health

Today, a friend pointed out to me that my girlfriend of 5 years looks a bit like my mom. She does, and I can't get it out of my head. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2016 at 3:26pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Love

Today, my girlfriend got pissed because she thought she heard me masturbating in the bathroom. I was brushing my teeth. FML

by PerfectBoyfriend / 06/07/2016 at 12:38pm / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Intimacy

Today, I noticed I'd lost my wedding ring after returning home from a long, tiring day of painting our newly purchased home. After driving back and forth to the house for more than an hour to go looking for it, I found it tucked away in my back pocket. FML

by Ansharus / 06/06/2016 at 9:47am / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend added me to his friends' private Whatsapp group, after weeks of asking him to include me in more of his life. It turns out almost all they do is post pictures of their shits and rate them. There is nearly a year's worth of pictures. FML

by ~~~~ / 05/27/2016 at 2:45pm / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Miscellaneous

Today, my co-workers decided in our meeting with my boss that everything is my fault. When asked for examples, they couldn't come up with any. Now they are mad at me, because I'm apparently good at my job. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2016 at 12:58pm / Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen) / Work

Today, I've been begging my boyfriend to get us a dog for months now. This morning, I noticed he'd bought some toilet paper with dogs printed on it. I asked him if it was a sign. He replied, "Yeah, one you can stick up your ass." FML

by Confession / 05/15/2016 at 10:07pm / Belgium / Animals

Today, my 4 year-old grand-daughter let her pet rabbit loose in the yard, while my 2 year-old grandson was trying to climb on a chair, then a table. I had to choose between catching the rabbit before it ran under the fence, or saving my grandson from falling on the concrete terrace. FML

by arianelagolden / 05/05/2016 at 2:07pm / Belgium (Brabant Wallon) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my overweight colleague twisted his ankle. He's pretty self-conscious about his weight, but I had a brain-fart and told him he shouldn't try to put too much weight on it. His feelings are more hurt than his ankle now. FML

by WeighYourWords / 05/03/2016 at 7:12am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Work

Today, I'm so lonely, I wrote my number on a desk at my university, hoping someone would text me. FML

by insurgent / 05/03/2016 at 4:31am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Love

Today, I found out about my sister's insanely detailed plan to abduct my one-year-old son and raise him as her own on another continent. All my mom did was tell me not to worry because she can't afford to move that far away. FML