FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, I went to a New Year's party with my boyfriend. Later into the night, he got drunk, and left me there to go to another party with his friends. I have no car, and no way to get home. FML

by Alana / 01/01/2011 at 12:27am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my boyfriend purposely makes me cry because it makes him feel special. FML

by ohemmgeee / 12/31/2010 at 6:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I finally went running to help me start losing weight. I got 50 metres before someone in a passing car shouted out "Run fatty, run". I can't work up the courage to go for a run again. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2010 at 2:14am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I finally found the words to describe how I felt after 2 years of depression. I asked on Yahoo Answers what I should do next. The most 'helpful' answer told me to go on a picnic. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 8:17pm / Australia / Health

Today, I was taking my earrings out and thought I had lost the back of one. Turns out my ear infection has caused the flesh of my ear to grow around and engulf the back of my earring and it is still stuck in there. FML

by caempa / 12/29/2010 at 1:13pm / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I went on my first date in months. My mum had invited friends over, and when I told them I was going out on a date, my mum said "No you're not, don't lie. Who would go out with you?" FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 8:01am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I swapped a shift so I didn't have to work on new year's eve. An hour later I realized I didn't have anyone to spend it with. I swapped it back. I'll be ringing in the new year with my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 5:18am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I helped out with makeup at my daughter's high school play. As one girl walked past, I told her that she'd smudged pink lipstick all up the side of her face. Turns out it was a birthmark. She cried in the dressing room for half an hour. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 12:02am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, on my way home from a Christmas party, the cab I was in was hit in the side. After making sure everyone was okay, the cab driver informed me that I'd still have to pay the cab fare, which he'd kept running. FML

by ouch / 12/22/2010 at 10:23am / Australia (Queensland) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boss quit his job and stopped coming in without warning. Guess who just inherited his tasks and responsibilities without the training or pay associated with his manager role. I was hired last year as a junior system admin. FML

by promoted / 12/20/2010 at 12:29am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, while in a public restroom I could hear a guy having his way with his hand. He was quoting verses from the bible. I was in a cubicle and he was at the urinal. I was too frightened to leave. This went on for a very long time. FML

by biblewanker / 12/17/2010 at 11:05am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I took out my ear cartilage piercing. With my comb. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 8:13am / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids