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FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, at a music festival, some douche unzipped the back of my skirt, exposing my Ninja Turtle undies to everyone before running off. FML

#21369215
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31915) - you deserved it (4834)

On 03/06/2015 at 9:03am - misc - by no touching - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML

#21365080
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36345) - you deserved it (2420)

On 02/28/2015 at 4:04am - health - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I am still finding glitter in my ass crack after a concert last night that had a confetti cannon. Thanks Marilyn Manson, I feel so metal now. FML

Today, I got pulled over for speaking on my phone. I accepted the fine because I was too ashamed to tell the cute officer that I was actually trying to pop a huge pimple on my cheek. FML

#21363177
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24422) - you deserved it (11669)

On 02/25/2015 at 5:33am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was off from school because of an extremely bad barking cough. My neighbours called the police because apparently my cough sounds like someone torturing an animal. FML

#21359104
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29479) - you deserved it (1950)

On 02/19/2015 at 8:46am - animals - by Animal cruelty (man) - Australia

Today, I went to an ATM intending to withdraw $150. I approached the machine, inserted my card, typed in my pin and followed the prompts. When my card came out, I removed it, put it in my pocket and drove off. FML

Today, after being with the company for over 3 years, I realised nobody really knows my name. This was after my boss was walking around a new staff member and couldn't introduce me. Neither could my colleague, who's been sitting next to me for the last 6 months. FML

#21358494
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32322) - you deserved it (3664)

On 02/18/2015 at 7:35am - work - by lonergirl - Australia

Today, I received a bunch of flowers from my 'lover'. This would be fine except that I don't have a lover, and my boyfriend now thinks I'm cheating. FML

#21357201
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33129) - you deserved it (2717)

On 02/16/2015 at 7:57am - love - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

#21356993
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33897) - you deserved it (2254)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, once again I tried to convince my dad to stop smoking. And once again, while I was speaking, he lit up a cigarette and smoked until my asthma flared up and I was wheezing so hard that I had to leave the room. FML

#21356583
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33367) - you deserved it (2555)

On 02/15/2015 at 9:52am - love - by =( (woman) - Australia

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

#21355623
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27586) - you deserved it (3136)

On 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm - love - by FMAhole - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while watching a clip of the show "16 and Pregnant" on YouTube in my room, my mom yelled from the kitchen that dinner was ready. Without skipping a beat, I yelled back, "I'm pregnant!" I'm a guy. FML

Today, I went to a thrift store and found heaps of clothes that I loved that fit me perfectly. Then I found a special distinctive dress. My dress. My dad had thrown away heaps of my clothes and I had to buy them all back. FML

#21355097
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28914) - you deserved it (2592)

On 02/12/2015 at 11:59pm - money - by NotMacklemore - Australia (Victoria)



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