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FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed and I noticed my boyfriend had commented on a post. It said, "Tag the hottest girl you know". Yeah, he tagged his ex. FML

#21346763
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31181) - you deserved it (2898)

On 01/30/2015 at 11:27am - misc - by Idek - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got attacked by a monkey. My country isn't even supposed to have monkeys in it. FML

#21346049
96 comments

Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hope whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch". Okay then. FML

#21345551
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28560) - you deserved it (2236)

On 01/28/2015 at 10:01am - work - by retailshell (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

#21340885
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33978) - you deserved it (3732)

On 01/20/2015 at 10:08am - misc - by mybfthecrossdresser (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was playing Charades. My boyfriend, who I'd recently had a fight with, had trouble and just said his answer was the name of my celebrity twin. Nobody got it. He said "Really? It's Fat Bastard." Stunned silence followed, broken by a single "HAH." from my 'best friend'. FML

#21340816
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29546) - you deserved it (3398)

On 01/20/2015 at 6:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 15 year old sister asked which animal rice comes from. She believed every word when my mum told her it's harvested from tiny cows in Asia. FML

#21340484
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27878) - you deserved it (2273)

On 01/19/2015 at 7:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I met my boyfriend's best friend. She was a girl he's known for years, and I respected that. She was sweet, until my boyfriend went to the bathroom and she threatened to stab me if I don't leave him. He doesn't believe me, and accused me of having serious jealousy issues. FML

#21340122
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37100) - you deserved it (2402)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, a customer tried to order a Zinger burger. I tried to explain that he was at McDonalds and that the Zinger is a KFC burger. He accused me of lying to him and tried to report me to my manager. FML

#21339341
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30063) - you deserved it (2218)

On 01/18/2015 at 2:04am - work - by McSlave - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that The Interview wasn't a documentary and that Kim Jong-un wasn't actually assassinated by a pair of goofy reporters. FML

#21338906
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27196) - you deserved it (5910)

On 01/17/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my dad was fixing my wardrobe and pushed too hard, causing stuff to fall from the top shelves. I saw it happen with my own eyes, but he's dead-set convinced that it was some kind of poltergeist fucking with him, and now he doesn't want me to go in my room. FML

#21338219
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26900) - you deserved it (2097)

On 01/16/2015 at 11:22am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my nutjob girlfriend dumped me for refusing to stop talking to my best friend, just because she's a woman. Before she left, my now-ex decided to punish me by destroying the dissertation I've spent months working on, along with both backups of it. FML

#21337587
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35933) - you deserved it (3906)

On 01/15/2015 at 12:23pm - love - by Can I press charges? (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, at the train station a woman's baggage had gotten stuck in the ticket barriers, so I used my ticket to unlock the barriers for her but told her to wait so I could get through too. She didn't wait. And I got painfully stuck in the barriers whilst I watched my train go by. FML

#21337468
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32335) - you deserved it (3253)

On 01/15/2015 at 6:35am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML

#21336365
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34890) - you deserved it (2859)

On 01/13/2015 at 11:25am - love - by can't win - Australia



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