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FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

#21290572
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35035) - you deserved it (3896)

On 11/02/2014 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was pulled over and fined $100 for driving without a license, as I'd accidentally left home without my wallet. I later found my wallet wedged beside my car seat, where it had been the entire time. FML

#21288966
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31588) - you deserved it (5962)

On 10/31/2014 at 9:35am - money - by emptypockets - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my friend thought she would "save me some time" by spoiling Game of Thrones. FML

#21288916
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28215) - you deserved it (3704)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, trying to be a good role model for the kids behind me, I stopped and thoroughly checked both sides of the road before crossing. I still managed to get hit by a car. FML

#21287500
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34410) - you deserved it (6646)

On 10/29/2014 at 4:19am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I'm so out of shape, I started wheezing on my way to check my mailbox. Not my physical mailbox, either; my email inbox on the phone I'd left on the table at the bottom of the stairs. FML

#21285495
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22358) - you deserved it (21193)

On 10/26/2014 at 6:35am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was shopping at my workplace, out of uniform, with my husband. A customer recognised me and wanted me to serve him, but I couldn't since we can be fired for doing so while off-duty. He complained to my manager, who wasted no time publicly bitching me out. FML

#21285416
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33587) - you deserved it (2160)

On 10/26/2014 at 1:53am - work - by iskiel (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was waiting at a traffic light next to an ice cream van. The man in it turned to me and winked, making sexual hand gestures. I felt my childhood die horribly as I watched. FML

#21284616
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33136) - you deserved it (2429)

On 10/24/2014 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, early in the morning, I got a knock on the door from the police. It seems my son and his friend had been caught throwing toilet paper at a neighbour's house. He's 23. FML

#21283412
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33083) - you deserved it (3720)

On 10/22/2014 at 9:33pm - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my parents told me off for reading, as opposed to watching TV like the rest of the family, because it was "anti-social". FML

#21282362
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32807) - you deserved it (2324)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I woke up to find "Fuck you, Harry" painted on my car. Harry's my neighbour. FML

#21280293
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35817) - you deserved it (2158)

On 10/18/2014 at 3:20am - misc - by Queensland - Australia

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44700) - you deserved it (2978)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my wife pressed a button in the elevator and quickly ran out, leaving me in there with my crying baby. When the elevator arrived at the floor, the doors opened on a wedding reception. The doors couldn't have taken any longer to close again FML

#21276854
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35194) - you deserved it (3227)

On 10/13/2014 at 11:42am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I thought I would be cute for my 1 year anniversary with my girlfriend so I cooked a three course meal for her with candles and rose petals on the floor. She loved the dinner, except now she's passed out in a food coma upstairs while I'm left with the dishes. FML

#21270586
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36690) - you deserved it (6925)

On 10/04/2014 at 9:57am - love - by cuteloser (man) - Australia



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