FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, after meticulously rereading my application, merging references, budgets, academic transcripts and itineraries for an amazing scholarship, I clicked submit, only to remember that the system was on Daylight Savings time, which we don't have in my state! I missed out on $2,500 by 3 minutes. FML

by PoorForever / 02/28/2016 at 8:53am / Australia (Queensland) / Money

Today, I went to visit my dad for the first time in over a year, as I have been studying for my Master's degree in history halfway across the world. The first thing he said to me? "So, gotten a real job yet?" FML

by Anonymous / 02/26/2016 at 3:37am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, during an unrelated appointment with my GP, he offered me a free check for chlamydia. Despite me reassuring him that I was STI free, he insisted that I should undergo the test. I ended up agreeing, only because I was too embarrassed to admit that I'm still a virgin. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2016 at 2:39am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, while taking the bus home, a girl stared at me for a while before asking me if I'd ever heard of makeup. FML

by living in the ugly treehouse / 02/14/2016 at 6:23am / Australia / Transportation

Today, I got jumpscared, by my freshly-bathed grandma coming out of the bathroom without a towel on. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2016 at 2:45am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cuddling with the man I've been seeing, and he started caressing the mammoth of all pimples on my back. He continued fondling me while lecturing me on the dangers of skin cancer. FML

by tooembarrassed / 02/12/2016 at 10:13am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I found out that the guy I've been crushing on for months is actually 15 years old. I'm 22. Not only is it gross, but it's also illegal. FML

by abnormallyadam / 02/09/2016 at 8:08am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I worked up the confidence to go to the mall alone for the first time since being confined to a wheelchair. It didn't even take 20 minutes before some teenager grabbed my wheelchair and tried to race me around, all while his friends watched and laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 02/05/2016 at 3:08pm / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, as my brother parked in our hotel's parking lot, I told him to be careful because the car wasn't straight. He retorted, "Yeah, just like you". My mother was in the back seat and heard everything. I hadn't come out yet. FML

by Anonymous / 02/05/2016 at 7:37am / Australia (Queensland) / Transportation

Today, my mum had no legitimate reason to have her daily yell at me, so she resorted to bitching me out for putting her phone on charge after it started beeping with a low battery warning. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2016 at 10:29am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I confronted my husband about a pair of panties I found in his office. They're his. He put them on to show me that they fit. FML

by Xandriajoy10 / 01/30/2016 at 10:44pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a woman yelled at me for hurting her. I'm a tattoo artist. FML

by thrill house / 01/24/2016 at 7:57pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, after the topic of grandkids came up yet again, my fiancé confessed that we've been having trouble conceiving. Later, I overheard his mum telling him to take my engagement ring back to the store and get a refund, because apparently I'm not worth marrying if I can't give him kids. FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2016 at 4:21am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Love