Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Taday ma friend were coming to pick me up from volleyball practice . Wen tier car pulled up, I jumped in . It was really quiet, so I looked up, only to fine I ad gotten in te wrong car . FML

#19684966
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21411) - you deserved it (9548)

On 05/26/2012 at 7:00pm - misc - by HorcruxDelight73 - United States (Washington)

HorcruxDelight73's comment about their FML

This was actually my FML, everyone. No, it wasn't a pedophile, THANK GOD. It was a couple, and they said "Umm...can we help you?" and I was like, "Sorry! I thought you were my friends!" Then got out awkwardly. They had the same car. It wasn't my fault.

See all the comments including another original poster's reaction

Today... I was choosing my soft drink at a restaurant. The kid in front of me was too short to reach the lids so I handd him one. His mom rushd over... prid it out of his hands... threw it away... an yelld... "She's filthy... don't use that." FML

#19672437
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26608) - you deserved it (2709)

On 05/24/2012 at 11:50am - kids - by td1078 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

td1078's comment about their FML

I wrote this FML story and for the record I was in a suit and heals, with my hair and makeup done, as i was on my home from the office. The woman was just a B. More than anything it was funny because she was so hysterical over a seemingly innocent gesture.

See all the comments

Today, there is an annular solar eclipse. As I was buying the last pair of solar glasses to watch the eclipse with, some jerk snatched them out of my hands an bolted off with them. I now have to make the decision between watching the eclipse an not going blind. real FML

#19653342
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18472) - you deserved it (2822)

On 05/20/2012 at 7:35pm - misc - by VocalizedBoar - United States (New Mexico)

VocalizedBoar's comment about their FML

No joke, all solar eclipse glasses were sold out. Even all the welding goggles were sold out at the hardware stores.

See all the comments including another original poster's reaction

Today , I tougt I felt my babby kicking 4 te first time. After excitedly exclaiming tis fact to te few people around me , I involuntarily let out te loudest fart. Not te babby kicking , just gas. mega FML

#19645533
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20738) - you deserved it (3728)

On 05/19/2012 at 7:05am - health - by GothicAngel17 - Australia (Queensland)

GothicAngel17's comment about their FML

57- well you seem to have quite a good memory, ha. I've gotta say I'm thankful that the morning sickness has subsided so I don't have to drop everything and run for the toilet or for fresh air (except on a Saturday for some reason). Now I'm just gassy it would seem. Oh joy. And forgetful. Speaking of which I just remembered I put eggs on the stove to boil a while ago and forgot about them so now I have to go D:

See all the comments including 14 other original poster's reactions

Today before I went into surgery the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get!! As he woke up in looool the recovery area 10 feet away I was getting my final prep before the operation!! On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain!! FML

#19645415
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23276) - you deserved it (1483)

On 05/19/2012 at 6:02am - health - by lubey - United States (North Carolina)

lubey's comment about their FML

Thanks for all the positive comments :) to answer som questions: yes I'm recovering well. The surgery was to fix a deviated septum. The patient before me didn't immediately respond to the pain meds that's why he was screaming. And I wrote this fml last night at 2 am after the anesthesia wore off

See all the comments including 12 other original poster's reactions

I found out the hard way that it is possible to sunburn the soles of yur feet. mega FML

#19628540
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17759) - you deserved it (4507)

On 05/15/2012 at 6:39pm - health - by Leadamp (man) -

Leadamp's comment about their FML

We where in Spain and I was reading a book by the pool.

See all the comments including another original poster's reaction

Today, I got all mah wisdom taath out. Hava you avar thrown up aftar mouth surgary? Stomach acid in yur bloody gum holas is just as fun as it sounds. FML

#19610335
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27415) - you deserved it (1805)

On 05/12/2012 at 2:41am - health - by lspicknall - United States (Wisconsin)

lspicknall's comment about their FML

Sorry darling! You really do just fall asleep then you wane up you're done! Just make sure to have ice packs and lots of cold soft foods

See all the comments including 3 other original poster's reactions

Today... I had a dream I was on the toilet taking the longest piss known to man. Unfortunately... it was partially true. big fat FML

#19581043
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22609) - you deserved it (2584)

On 05/06/2012 at 7:54am - misc - by geez_wth - United States (California)

kissandcontrol01's comment about their FML

This is the OP. I actually am in my 20s and had passed out after taking a muscle relaxer. Never slept so well in the last year or so.. Until.. I woke up cold and wet ????

See all the comments

Today, while at the store, I realized how socially inept I am when I said ( excuse me ) to a shopping cart because it was in my way. FML

#19579687
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18476) - you deserved it (4327)

On 05/05/2012 at 11:19pm - misc - by BTM13 (woman) - United States (New York)

BTM13's comment about their FML

Of course I did. Like shopping carts, keyboard help us out a lot in life and deserve to be recognized. XD

See all the comments including another original poster's reaction

Today, my apartment was robbed by my looool landlord!! Her logic? "I own the building, an therefore everything in it." That TV cost more than my rent!! FML

#19572629
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30652) - you deserved it (2387)

On 05/04/2012 at 10:38am - money - by Eragons_Mommy92 - United States

Eragons_Mommy92's comment about their FML

This is mine. we did call the cops. we have to prove its our tv so now we have to find the receipt from 2 years ago. her whole family is into illegal shit. her son got arrested recently for forging the mayors signature. we intend on moving as soon as we find an available apartment.

See all the comments including 3 other original poster's reactions

Today..!! tha school nursa callad ma in!! Sha said sha knaw I was pragnant and sha was worriad about how it was affacting mah gradas!! I'm not pragnant!! Apparantly I'm just stupid and fat!! FML

#19572337
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30352) - you deserved it (5176)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:25am - health - by CharlieOrion (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

CharlieOrion's comment about their FML

Hey, I'm OP- and I'm really not that fat! I've just gained weight quickly, cause I'm stressed about exams... This didn't really help much!

See all the comments including another original poster's reaction

Today, I Was Petting My Cat And I Jokingly Said Out Loud, "Oh, The Pussy Likes It Rough? You Like That, Don't You?" My Windows Were Open And I Could Hear The Neighbors Laughing !! FML

#19570232
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9997) - you deserved it (28985)

On 05/03/2012 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by anonymous4991 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

anonymous4991's comment about their FML

From the poster: I fully expected to a lot of "you deserved it" I just thought it was too funny not to share with the world. Yes, I was talking about petting an actual feline. No, I do not talk to myself while masturbating or have regular conversations with the cat. My neighbor's porch is a couple feet from my window and I can hear all of their conversations too. I am dating someone and have gotten laid recently. I think it is hilarious they put it in the "intimacy" section.

See all the comments

Today, I was looking through my roommate's room trying to fine a DVD, when I stumbled upon a bundle of pictures of me showering and sleeping !! FML

#19546407
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38680) - you deserved it (2531)

On 04/29/2012 at 6:10am - misc - by Tashie01 - Australia

Tashie01's comment about their FML

What i'd like to know is how he got pictures of me showering without me knowing. :/

See all the comments including 2 other original poster's reactions



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: