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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, my boyfriend and I got in a fight about which is better: Star Wars or Lord of the Rings. We aren't speaking. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19991) - you deserved it (8992)

On 09/22/2015 at 1:18am - love - by amburrjade - United States (Texas)

amburrjade's comment about their FML

Hi guys! I'm the OP :) I'm 19, and my boyfriend's 20. I thought LotR was better, personally. To be fair, I've only seen one of the Star Wars movies, and he's only seen half of one of the LotR movies, so we were both a little biased. This was last night though, and by the morning, it was forgotten. We're all good now. Thanks for your comments! :)

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Today, my boyfriend cooked us a romantic dinner using the oven. The oven he recently hid $3,000 in for safekeeping. We essentially just spent thousands of dollars on a casserole. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21145) - you deserved it (11697)

On 09/21/2015 at 8:35pm - money - by Lucachoo (woman) - United States (California)

Lucachoo's comment about their FML

So yeah, storing money in the oven is a terrible idea. My bf (we'll call him Huck because he's a dumbass) is a bit paranoid and insisted on hiding the money somewhere where burglars couldn't find it. I told him it was fine since our nearest neighbors are a couple miles away but he insisted so I just gave up. Didn't realize that idiot would hide the cash in the oven then have a huge brain fart and use the oven to cook. We aren't complete idiots though, we do keep our life savings in the bank. The reason Huck put money in the oven was because we live on a farm that's a bit distant from the nearest major bank. We keep some money on hand in case something breaks and we have to fix it or make repairs and such. It's quicker when we have the money on hand. Otherwise we'd have to spend a couple hours driving to the bank, buying supplies, then coming back. Also while money does burn at 451 degrees, 451 degrees is the auto-ignition point of paper (the temperature that paper catches fire without being exposed to an external flame). So if the air temperature was 451 degrees the money would have burned but Huck put the money at the bottom of the oven, right on top of the hot metal burner thingy (I don't know what it's called) and that metal thing gets red hot. But yeah, Huck realized his stupidity after the oven finished preheating and managed to save some of the money though a third of it still burned to some degree. I'm still pretty pissed regardless and kinda feel like shoving Huck into the oven as well. The fact that he was trying to be nice by cooking dinner is the only thing preventing me from completely going apeshit on him. The first thing I'm making him do is go to the bank and try to replace the money. And he will never be in charge of safekeeping money ever again.

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Today, the nicest present I received for my 18th birthday was a free razor in the mail. It was then stolen by my mom. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23417) - you deserved it (1575)

On 09/20/2015 at 9:58am - misc - by ezrocks4u - United States (North Carolina)

ezrocks4u's comment about their FML

Hi, OP here. To give some context, I got a few t shirts for my birthday. My birthday was a month ago(thanks for the birthday wishes!) but only found out about the fact that my mom stole said razor a day ago, because I saw the package addressed to me in the trash. Needless to say, it is too late to steal back.
I had posted another birthday FML(from the actual day of) never got posted. Got locked outside of my car in the rain for 3 hours, couldn't afford a locksmith, and missed my birthday dinner.

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Today, I got a mosquito bite on my wrist. Maybe I'm paranoid, but I am pretty sure mosquito bites are not supposed to start crawling up to your armpit while swelling. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24230) - you deserved it (1544)

On 09/20/2015 at 3:11am - health - by Severus_Snape_ - United States (California)

Severus_Snape_'s comment about their FML

Wow, this is the first time one of my FMLs have been accepted! I googled whatever was happening on my arm, and I think 26 may or may not be right. According to the internet, if should go away in a few days, and it was a spider bite. But ever since I was a kid, I've always attracted some weird bug bites, but this has never happened to me before. Unfortunately, I am the type of person that will twist my wrist and still just say that I'm fine. Like that time where I threw up twice when I was 11 years old and still insisted that I was well enough to go to school, only to be sent back home when I threw up again. I applied some type of cream thing on the bite, and it has gotten better. It'll probably go away in a few days. Hopefully.

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Today, I found my diamond earring, which had gone missing. The vet had to surgically remove it from my dog. Despite having made the voyage through the dog's digestive tract, the earring is more expensive than ever. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19723) - you deserved it (1712)

On 09/19/2015 at 6:43pm - animals - by IamHM (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

IamHM's comment about their FML

Bingo! He's a black lab. And apparently likes shiny things.

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Today, my girlfriend told me she has decided to become a stay-at-home mom for our dog. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23665) - you deserved it (2733)

On 09/18/2015 at 5:24pm - misc - by connorcaffery (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

connorcaffery's comment about their FML

A little background info.
I've been with my girlfriend for four years- She is not the type to make me work while she does shit all.
We did have a long talk about this. She is just very stressed out as she is not here for 3 days out of the week because she makes a 2 hour commute to and from university every week and when she is here she works. She is just stressed and tired and feeling guilty about not spending enough time with our dog pepsi. She is not lazy, and certainly not a bitch just struggling keeping up with all aspects of her life right now. Thanks to all the nice and supportive comments we both appreciate them. :)

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Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic and trick me into missing my flight, so he could spend another day with me before I have to return to Asia for work. There is nothing romantic about spending 2 hours trying to sort out a new international itinerary with Delta's automated menus. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24123) - you deserved it (2118)

On 09/17/2015 at 10:37pm - love - by ak47nd (woman) - China (Liaoning)

ak47nd's comment about their FML

Hi, this is OP. To be fair, he did fly me out to visit him and put a real effort into making the week we had together great. That said, after I did manage to fix the flight back, I think he was scared I was going to kick him in the balls for that stunt for most of the extra 24 hours we had together. But the makeup sex was great and I barely managed to make it back in time for work obligations, so bf is EXTREMELY lucky :) And we have a new relationship rule of not fucking with travel arrangements. Sigh.

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Today, while playing with a group of kids at the school where I work, I heard an immense rip. I looked down and recoiled in shock as I noticed a gaping maw in my pants stretching from my ass to my left kneecap. I had to finish the rest of the day and walk home like that. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20253) - you deserved it (1725)

On 09/17/2015 at 11:40am - work - by TheNewGuy03 (man) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

TheNewGuy03's comment about their FML

I wish I wore my sky blue Wii boxers for that momentous occasion, then. I am filled with regret.

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Today, my boyfriend is trying to get me to cut my hair, wear different clothes, apply my makeup differently, and even change my morals and values to match his mother's. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26531) - you deserved it (2482)

On 09/15/2015 at 10:11pm - love - by kukumber (woman) - United States

kukumber's comment about their FML

Hi, this is OP! I can't believe this got posted! Anyway, he has always been a huge mama's boy and thinks that her way is the only way. She is a rather rude and opinionated woman, and has raised him to think that there is only one way to do things, and that's her way. I did talk to him and explain that I am not his mother and that I like myself just as I am and don't plan on changing, and he got pretty upset about it. We are now over, but it doesn't bother me much since this has been an ongoing issue for awhile now, and he just can't accept me for who I am.
He was always trying to tell me that I should cut my long hair super short because his mom cut hers that way, and even asked me what I would do if I woke up with short hair, which concerned me. He also told me he and his mom didn't like my choice of clothing so that I should dress like she does, that I should wear my makeup like hers, and that my opinions, morals and values should be exactly the same as his mother's. It was just too much, and he got really upset when I told him no. He even suggested I quit college and my decent-paying job and get a job working with his mom for minimum wage and to draw welfare like her. He also always expected me to drive him everywhere, buy him everything he wanted, and baby him. I think I dodged a bullet, and I feel much better without all of the pressure to change.

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Today, my teacher plugged the speakers into the wrong input on his computer, and said, "Oops, wrong hole", to which one of the students who often makes the same mistake said, "Story of my life". I understood it differently and started laughing. It would have been fine if the teacher wasn't her father. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24965) - you deserved it (3396)

On 09/15/2015 at 6:31am - misc - by zachjm98 - Canada (Ontario)

zachjm98's comment about their FML

OP here!!
Wow, thanks for the funny comments, guys! If I knew this would have gotten featured so quickly I would have made an account beforehand!
Anyways, quick follow-up:
This "class" of mine is actually a co-op program in music for songwriting/recording/touring which I'm doing a second time now. My teacher knows me well, the student in question is my best friend and her father found the incident to be quite funny actually.
All is good!

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Today, I was convinced to face my fears of rollercoasters by a friend. I'm writing this at the highest point of the ride after being stuck over thirty minutes. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26775) - you deserved it (2099)

On 09/14/2015 at 1:54pm - misc - by VHBJ - United States (North Carolina)

VHBJ's comment about their FML

Hi OP Here

For those wondering, it was the Fury at Carowinds. I've heard rumors of it stopping a lot, but is been really hoping to beat my fear. My state of mind was millions do this, just think to yourself you know it will end so enjoy the ride. Imagine my surprise when the ride stops. No more coasters any time soon. Thanks for the supportive comments.

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Today, I slipped in my own vomit while dashing to the bathroom to puke. My knee hit and shattered the toilet; the toilet shattered my knee. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28809) - you deserved it (2185)

On 09/14/2015 at 1:21am - health - by kunjac0945 - United States (New York)

kunjac0945's comment about their FML

OP here. For clarity's sake, this actually happened to me several years ago, on the first day of my summer break. I had to spend the rest of break, as well as my birthday in a cast.

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Today, I got excited about finishing up my laundry detergent and softener, because I could get new ones. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20763) - you deserved it (3240)

On 09/13/2015 at 5:28pm - misc - by TheVengefulGeek - Canada (Ontario)

TheVengefulGeek's comment about their FML

OP here. Can't believe this actually got published.

Insight time: we've been stuck in the little-to-no-money rut for a about a year now. The detergent we had smelled like hospitals and that weird plastic-y smell you get hit with at the dentist's office. We finally have enough money to get the stuff that has an actual scent instead of whatever "clean breeze" is supposed to be, so it's a small victory that is actually quite symbolic to us.

Your comments had me laughing. A lot of you are right; enjoy the little things. You tend to miss out if you overlook them :)

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