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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, in the middle of my haircut, the hairdresser went into labor. They never finished cutting it. FML

#21347835
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30488) - you deserved it (3991)

On 02/01/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by TheTacoMan -

TheTacoMan's comment about their FML

OP here, I wasn't saying that she should come back to complete my hair cut, I was talking about everyone else who was working there. Luckily the hair cutter made it to the hospital in time, and she gave birth to a healthy boy, or so they said over the phone. I came back the next day and they finished cutting my hair... For half price.

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Today, I was at an interview for one of the top universities in the U.S. Everything was going great until I choked on my own saliva and almost threw up on the interviewer. FML

#21347318
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27847) - you deserved it (2647)

On 01/31/2015 at 2:14pm - misc - by Paras_800 - United States

Paras_800's comment about their FML

Hey guys, its OP here! Just to clear a few things up, I was the one applying to the college, not interviewing another person. Sorry it was a typo, but in terms of the college I am hoping they will look at the big picture rather than focusing on the one mistake.

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Today, I got hit between the legs with a kayak. FML

#21347300
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26179) - you deserved it (2673)

On 01/31/2015 at 1:22pm - misc - by UnidentifiedFun (woman) - United States (New York)

UnidentifiedFun's comment about their FML

Alright, some of you need clarification.. So my friend and I were paddle boarding/kayaking (she had the kayak), and I decided to backfloat in the water for a bit, as it was smooth waters and a relaxing day. But alas, my friend thought it would be hilarious to full-steam ahead into my crotch. Needless to say, it was a painful experience.

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Today, my girlfriend ran off with my beloved dog. Why? Yesterday she asked me who I'd choose, and I honestly said that I would choose the dog. FML

#21346972
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26487) - you deserved it (16226)

On 01/30/2015 at 7:13pm - love - by nodoggforme - United States (Oregon)

nodoggforme's comment about their FML

OP here. Just to set things straight, we'd only been dating for about 3 weeks and weren't lifelong friends before that or anything. My dog I've had for 7 years, so yeah, he won. I agree that if it had been the other way around I would have deserved it.

The whole thing came up when we were sitting on the couch and I was rubbing my dog's back. Psycho chick then asked why I wasn't rubbing hers instead and asked who I cared for more and choose. "'Cause you can only have one!" Now I have none :(. Still looking for my dog.

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Today, a booklet came in the mail, addressed to me and titled "How To Train Your Wife". I didn't order it but my wife doesn't believe me. FML

#21346949
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27135) - you deserved it (2310)

On 01/30/2015 at 6:28pm - love - by briang959 - United States (Georgia)

briang959's comment about their FML

I'm the OP. Thankfully my wife has a good sense of humor. We eventually found out some of our friends did this as a joke. :). Time to pay the prank forward. The comments are hilarious, BTW.

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Today, I got attacked by a monkey. My country isn't even supposed to have monkeys in it. FML

#21346049
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28041) - you deserved it (2499)

On 01/29/2015 at 5:10am - animals - by Crystal_da_thing (woman) - Australia

Crystal_da_thing's comment about their FML

I'm the one who wrote the fml turns out it escaped from a traveling zoo

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Today, instead of taking down the Christmas tree, my sister covered it with Valentine's Day decorations. FML

#21345710
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23259) - you deserved it (3234)

On 01/28/2015 at 5:35pm - misc - by lolcat97 - United States (New York)

lolcat97's comment about their FML

I'm the OP, and I'm glad this got published! For those wondering, it is a fake tree. And it was actually because of my laziness that I had her take it down because I never got around to it. That is when she came up with her "brilliant" idea to cover it with Valentine's Day decorations, which my parents did not seem too impressed with haha.

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Today, I went on my first date in over 4 years with a smoking hot guy. The big event was a trip to Target. I work at Target. He took me to my workplace for our date. And they say romance is dead. FML

#21345533
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27937) - you deserved it (2476)

On 01/28/2015 at 8:51am - love - by anonpbc (woman) - United States (Kansas)

anonpbc's comment about their FML

OP here. To clarify for the haters, I do know what a date is supposed to be, I'm not an idiot. We had been planning to meet up for weeks. The date was lame, hence why I posted to FML. But it was definitely intended as a real date, accompanied by dinner and shopping a few other stores. No errands were ran, No groceries or Tp was purchased. I visited a few coworkers & he picked up a few electronics items. and no I didn't buy it or use my employee discount. It was my day off & he knew it was my workplace.

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Today, I was talking to a girl. It was going pretty well until she said, "LOL." What's so bad about that? We weren't texting. FML

#21345280
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25189) - you deserved it (4668)

On 01/27/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by MyUsernameisEpic (man) - United States (Florida)

MyUsernameisEpic's comment about their FML

Okay, so this is my FML.

The girl is 15, and we have classes together in school. I didn't really mind that she said it, but it was funny. That's why I decided to share it on here, and it actually got posted! Anyway, back to the story. We were talking in class about something and I made a joke and she started giggling and then, she said, "LOL!" Like, "el-oh-el". Also, I should mention that I wasn't flirting with her or anything. I'm not pursuing a relationship with her, but if I was, I wouldn't completely freak out and change my mind because she said lol. That'd make me a judgmental prick. That'd be pretty screwed up of me. Lastly, I'd like to say that I am friends with her, and just because she said lol, that doesn't mean I think she's stupid or anything.

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Today, I was getting a haircut. During the haircut, the barber cut her hand. She hesitated for a minute then continued to run her hands through and cut my hair with her bloody fingers. FML

#21345207
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27765) - you deserved it (1932)

On 01/27/2015 at 6:06pm - misc - by Animaldude55 - United States (California)

Animaldude55's comment about their FML

I am the OP. Basically it was near the end of the haircut when this happened so I didn't have time to say anothing. Just to add a few more details, she tried putting on a bandaid but it didn't work, rubbed her fingers on a towel I saw blood.

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Today, I found out my girlfriend is bulimic. Like that wasn't bad enough, I found out because she spent all of our rent money on food. FML

#21345004
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25487) - you deserved it (3110)

On 01/27/2015 at 9:07am - health - by nicktrelos (man) - Greece

nicktrelos's comment about their FML

I'm not making it about myself - I'm not happy with the money loss, of course, but 350€ is nothing compared to how much I care. I meant it in a "that's devastating, and this sucks too" way if that makes sense?

Thank you all so much for your support. We've been together for years, and she's my best friend in the world. It's hard to believe I never noticed the signs.

The rent will be taken care of, right now getting her help is the most important thing :) I'm going to support her every step of the way. I've been learning about eating disorders all weekend (event was actually from Friday), and I can say for sure it wasn't a matter of being selfish. She's sick. That's not her fault, it's everyone else's for making her feel worthless.

You're all incredibly sweet! A bit sour about the jokes, but that's okay, haha. I never take anything seriously myself.

We can get through this :)

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Today, I mentioned to my girlfriend that I'd sent in a job application after she went home. In front of her parents. Who thought she'd stayed the night at a friend's place. FML

#21344632
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21804) - you deserved it (8069)

On 01/26/2015 at 5:30pm - misc - by TysonY2 (man) - United States (Idaho)

TysonY2's comment about their FML

CLARIFICATION:
(Yes I am the op)
Yes, she stayed the night at my house. We are both 18, and have been dating for 4 years. Her parents had been assuming we had been "fooling" around for quite some time, so they weren't really per say SHOCKED when it slipped my mind. We both live with our parents, but my mom left for the night.

The reason it slipped my mind was because she was the one who told me there was an opening (she saw a sign as we were driving back from getting coffee the morning after), so to my stupid ass brain attributed her directly to applying in the first place.

Her mom laughed, and her dad remained silent. Her little brother also remained silent.

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Today, a weird friend of my father's decided to visit us. Our house isn't very big, so when he went to the bathroom, I could hear everything. He didn't wash his hands after a massive dump, and when he came out of the bathroom he patted my face. FML

#21344428
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29032) - you deserved it (2036)

On 01/26/2015 at 6:29am - misc - by texasrose921 - United States (Illinois)

texasrose921's comment about their FML

Hi, I wrote this FML. Have any of you ever seen an older friend of the family you haven't seen in a while? They've most likely said something like, "Oh, how you've grown!" Or given you a compliment, and then given you a hug or patted you on the head. That's what happened with this guy. He was commenting on a compliment my dad gave me, and decided to pat my face, like a much older uncle would. It wasn't in any weird, predator way. But it was gross. And yes I scrubbed my face with anti-bacterial soap right after.

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