Hey, I've found if you stick around long enough, the creepy becomes cute and the girls just learn to love ya... Or they get a restraining order. Either way, no sense giving up until you're arrested, sued, or married, right?

Why are you sorry? The OP has a bright future in blackmail.

29- The future is black...

He's a creepaa, like a boss.

Since I just have to ask, was her name Debra?

If it was, I think he's allowed to cry deeply and then shit on her desk among other things. He is the boss, you know.

Sounds like my boss. He is a dirty old married man.

90- but he doesn't suck his own dick, that's just not him.

The woman he's stalking is a lesbian...

Because he's trying to be a good friend/co-worker? Just because he's backing her up, doesn't mean he's trying to get with her too.

It's called pointing it out to the creep of the boss so that he knows that she is not available so he can stop his advances. It's not being nosy or anything. Rather It's being a good person or friend.

Boss is whining to OP about it. Repeatedly it seems. I'd lose my shit, too.

OP doesn't initially care. He's pointing out that A) the boss doesn't have a chance because his secretary's in a relationship and isn't going to cheat and B) even if she was single, she's gay anyway and wouldn't be interested. That's why OP cares. Sheesh.

Dude that was a stupid fucking question

Also because the boss is kinda harassing her. He may have gotten suspended for it but in the long run everyone will be a little happier.

Re-read the post, then look at how stupid your comment looks.

It is and she or he (can he?) needs to sue!

Why does it always come down to a lawsuit?

Cause for once this FML is coming to a lawsuit. Sexual harassment is not cool

44 - Because if challenging everyone that annoys you to brutal gladiatorial combat was legal, lawyers and judges would be paid significantly less and the lobbyists can't have that. So you want something done, you have to do it legally. =/

The OP was not harassed, and the secretary likes the free lunches, so no, there is no harassment here.

3 accidentally gave all their pronouns to 20.

Why did I read that as the rapist? I think I might need to see a therapist myself.

#75 you had a perfect opportunity for a classic FML bad joke by simply removing the "a". I am disappoint.

Still, it's a YDI. There's a different between calmly telling someone they're wrong and exploding on someone like OP described. The boss may be a terrible person and a terrible boss to his secretary, but suspending OP is something I can't disagree with.

Sometimes people just need to be called out honestly.

I'd say human resources in the early stages of this, Private confrontation around the middle to end, and call em out in front of the entire office as a last resort.

Yeah, OP kinda deserved to get suspended, but OP's boss kinda deserves to be fired.

I agree 17, but there is a difference between totally flipping shit and calling him out honestly. In OP's case, some serious shit was flipped if he got suspended.