Today, while using a doorless restroom at the beach, a pack of seagulls rushed into my stall, followed by a group of kids chasing them. I guess the noise from tearing open a pad sounded enough like a bag of chips for them to think there was food. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while at the beach, my little sister thought it would be cute to feed a small seagull some of her food. Minutes later a flock of seagulls swarmed and attacked me and my sandwich. FML
Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML
Today, I drove to the beach for an hour to relax before returning to the intense workload of midterms. A kid walking by threw a cracker near me and I was instantly attacked by a group of seagulls. FML
Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML
Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML
Today, I was taking a crap in a public stall when three kids broke down the door and pelted me with eggs. FML
Today, I tried to quietly open a bag of chips during a movie. The bag made so much noise that people turned around to stare. When I finally got it open, I dropped the entire bag on the floor and chips scattered down the aisle. FML
Today, I was trying to relax on the beach after a stressful day, just to overhear a bunch of kids near me start fighting over who pooped in the hole they'd dug in the sand. FML
Today, I went to the supermarket and picked up some groceries, along with what I thought was a bag of chips. I ripped it open in the car and realized it was a bag of birdseed. As I spat out the birdseed through the car's open window and tried to clean the mess, a pigeon flew into my car and attacked me. FML
Today, I spent the only money I had left for lunch only to take two bites before a seagull snatched my burger from my hands. I had to shamefully start walking back to work with a pair of girls laughing at me and an empty stomach. FML
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Top comments
awildwhisper 30
This is why all bathrooms need doors and locks...
Isa_fml 20
Doorless restroom? The ****?
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Comments (13)
joeyl2008 29
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
This is why you shouldn't go to the beach while on your period. Woman should be confined to a locked room while menstruating.
Cali 54
...was that a really bad attempt at a joke?
awildwhisper 30
This is why all bathrooms need doors and locks...
Glowworm56 26
That must have either been a really noisy pad or those gulls had really sharp ears because the last time I checked, pads did not sound like bags of chips.
awildwhisper 30
well they do have sharp hearing
Isa_fml 20
They're birds, I imagine any kind of plastic crinkling is going to make them think "FOOD!"
Glowworm56 26
Sadly, I can easily imagine them all going "MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!" XD
wickedgetz 30
Kids these days have great hearing.
GIJoefan 6
Silly birds!
kimiirenee 17
if you're at the beach, why not use a tampon so you don't end up with a bloody diaper on?
TaoShaman 24
Not everyone can or wants to. And what do diapers have to do with anything? They're not the same thing. People go to the beach without getting in the water all the time.
Isa_fml 20
Doorless restroom? The ****?
Ray_of_midnight 22
Do you look like Tippi Hedren?
PaulieXP 16
When they saw it wasn't food, did they run so far away?
EbyKat 16
Time to switch to menstrual cups.