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I sure that almost every chair you've ever sat in has already had its fart cherry popped.

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Ehhh this comment is better than 'first' I guess

#16 No, it isn't. I would've farted and said "new high score"

10/10 most inspiring thing I've read all day, #1

#1 more like, "I want the first comment so bad. Let me stay on this website for hours and wait until an FML shows up so I can achieve this (pointless) goal." Congrats bro. I'm clapping

Or maybe #1 just thinks it's gross.

#1 can't have an opinion I suppose, because everything on FML has to be witty and well-thought-out. Especially the first comment. God forbid he should think it's actually gross.

I never understand why people believe the first comment just can't be one word. I mean I could get it if he just put first, but what's wrong with saying he finds it gross?

You must've gotten off fast!!

Yeah if he was the one who came when his girlfriend farted on his lap..

Especially if she did it while he was sitting in that chair.

That sounds like a weird fetish. Who gets off from farts?

Three words: Brazilian fart porn

I meant getting off the chair.

Why the hell would you do that to a chair?.. And also, how?

Or look him in the eye and say, "you have no idea how many times I (bold I) have farted in this chair"

This man exhibited true chivalry today. Most men would just walk away but he had the courage to save her from the stanky chair.

OP: "Oh, so it wasn't a heated chair after all...."

That's nearly as bad as thinking about how many people the water you are drinking has gone through.

Actually, I hadn't ever thought about that until you brought it up. So thanks for that.

There are two types of people in this world.......

I remember hearing that it was about 7 people. Now, if only I knew who these people were before I take a drink.

If it goes through 7 people, then that means, that the other 7 had 7 other people's water. So it goes through 49 people, but then the other 42 people had 7 other people's water go through them…

Well that's a stinky situation

I don't think "stinky situation" was ever even a 'thing' on fml

Don't let it be...

It will be. (ha thought I'd join in)

Well, I know next time.

I sure that almost every chair you've ever sat in has already had its fart cherry popped.

Yeah if you've rationalised this every bus, train and car seat has been farted in, nothing big.

Well that blew me away.

Weird....anyways don't worry about it OP.

Well... How many times?

not just him, me too