Today, while on student exchange in Germany, I was making myself...

By Hum - 2/7/2011 21:50 - Switzerland

Today, while on student exchange in Germany, I was making myself a cup of coffee. When I rummaged around in the fridge, my room-mates asked me what I was looking for. I said I wanted to put "samen" in my coffee. They laughed. Ah yes, "sahne" means "cream". "Samen" means "sperm". FML

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Intimacy

Rock, hard place

All for nothing

Clocked

By geewhy - 26/12/2012 21:20 - United States - South Park

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

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By married to a nerd - 7/6/2018 20:30

Today, I asked my 4-year-old daughter where her father went. She said, "Out to have fun with Zoe." Acting on suspicion, I followed him and did a stakeout. Hours later, I barged in and caught him playing Dungeons and Dragons. "Zoe" is the female wizard he plays as. FML

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By Anonymous - 6/6/2019 22:00

Today, I had a party at my house. I have a nice laptop that I hook up to the stereo, but someone almost spilt beer on it, so I took it downstairs. Later on in the night, I went down to look something up on it. Someone had taken a shit on it. FML

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By Anonymous - 3/3/2011 11:22 - United States

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

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By Annoymous - 3/9/2009 10:19 - Australia

Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML

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By notgreg - 10/11/2009 15:59 - United States

Today, I found out my neighbor ordered parking tickets for everyone on the block. My car was 4 inches into his driveway, but not obstructing his exit in any way. That didn't stop him from calling in, on a Sunday, at 8 AM, an 88 dollar ticket. He also left a note "Your parking sucks, love, Greg." FML

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By fml - 22/5/2012 23:54 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I saw a psychiatrist for the first time. He asked me what had brought me there, so I said I needed to get over some issues. He told me to close my eyes and visualize myself constructing a bridge. I paid to get told to build a bridge in my mind's eye. FML

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By anonymous - 10/9/2010 18:09 - United States

Today, at school, everybody wanted to be my partner for a project. This surprised me because nobody ever wants to be with me. Turns out when I was absent, my teacher promised that whoever was my partner would get extra points on the project. FML

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By speshlk37 - 20/8/2012 02:19 - United States

Today, while traveling with my cat, I had a mini-freakout when I realized that I left his favorite toy in the hotel room. I'm a 30-year-old man. FML

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By Username - 3/6/2011 14:04 - United States

Today, while babysitting I decided to play with a children's puzzle to pass the time. Fifteen minutes in I gave up. The kid then came over and put it together in less than five. There were only ten pieces. FML

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By Wisconsin love - 13/12/2010 17:35 - United States

Let me Slytherin

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

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By JTinNJ - 27/8/2016 11:57 - United States - Parsippany

Today, I woke up and poured myself a large glass of orange juice from a carton and took a big gulp only to realize it was liquid eggs. FML

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By Jumanji - 12/12/2008 06:05 - France

Today, I opened my laptop in the train to watch a good film I had downloaded. Of course, it was a fake and the whole carriage was allowed to watch and hear five seconds of butt licking. FML

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By Noname - 2/3/2009 18:52 - Canada

Today, I decided to be a good driver and not run through the yellow light. As soon as I stopped my car another came and rear-ended me. The guy told me to go in the parking lot so we can exchange information. So I drove into the parking lot, I turned my head and watched him drive away. FML

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By loud sweeper - 7/10/2019 06:00

Mrs Heckles?

Today, my batshit crazy downstairs neighbor threatened me with "legal action" for making too much noise. According to her, it’s "illegal" for people in upstairs apartments to use vacuum cleaners, therefore I must sweep my carpets to avoid disturbing her and her imaginary guests. FML

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By canabana - 11/4/2009 08:42 - Canada

Today, I spent 3 hours trying to close a simple $400 deal with a homeowner. He spent 3 hours telling me about his life story including his marital problems, his philosophical views of the world, AND he read me 20 pages of haiku poems. Only 3 hours later did he tell me he couldn't accept my deal. FML

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By keelah - 27/6/2014 21:57 - United States - Montgomery

Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year old woman, to tears. FML

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By All The Best People Are Crazy~ - 4/11/2016 03:49 - Canada - Oakville

Today, my cat used his expensive new bed for the first time since he got it last month. He used it as a litter box. FML

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By Cody - 30/4/2011 06:13 - United States

Today, I got pulled by a cop because I forgot to put my registration sticker on. I get nervous around authority and have nervous shakes. I ripped the registration sticker 3 times trying to put it on. The cop then gave me a ticket for "Improper Equipment". FML

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By what - 11/6/2015 22:46 - United States - Livermore

Today, the man who stole my laptop at the train station yesterday used the contact information I had written on it to call me and ask for the password. FML

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By JustEwww - 22/10/2009 21:24 - Australia

Today, I played with the white dust on the counter at work for the last time. After a couple of weeks of arriving to a thin coating of dust over the counter, and drawing in it, piling it up and other such fun things, I met the guy who now does the earlier shift. He has a huge, dandruffy beard. FML

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By marisacb - 13/3/2013 18:52 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with my best friend. Depressed, I started telling her about my terrible week. A woman came over and asked me to not be so "whiny and negative" in front of her children. FML

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By Moimoi78 - 1/2/2017 05:00 - Australia - Eatons Hill

What? It's just helpful advice because we know better.

Today, I introduced the concept of 'mansplaining' to my husband. Ever since, he's been deliberately mansplaining every single thing to me. All. The. Time. FML

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By hobbit - 22/5/2013 17:40 - United States - Winthrop

Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails asked if I wanted my toe hairs trimmed. I was so taken aback and embarrassed that I said yes. They charged me extra. FML

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By Anonymous - 13/8/2015 04:39 - United States - Mount Pleasant

Today, I realized I apologize too often as I said I was sorry to my boyfriend as he broke up with me. I apologized for being sad and making him feel bad. FML

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By Salzburg - 6/5/2019 12:00

Today, my sister and I got a room in the attic of an old hotel, while our parents got a room several floors down. We discovered the room was full of bugs. Our parents didn't believe us, so we brought them some as proof. They told us to get over it. We can't sleep. We've killed 50 and counting. FML

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By weep weep weep - 12/3/2012 03:04 - United States

Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML

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By Demotivation - 23/8/2013 14:12 - Germany

Today, I learned that when a heavily-pregnant friend asks about my progress with the baby socks I promised to knit, it's rather unwise to tell her, "Not to worry, we're set even if it comes out with a few feet too many." She's still crying. FML

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By boardman - 25/5/2009 02:17 - United States

Creeped out

Today, I found out my parents joined the mile-high club. While I was on the plane. FML

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By Anonymous - 6/2/2017 12:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, after months of apartment hunting with my boyfriend, he told me he had found a fantastic place that was really inexpensive. It seemed way too good to be true. It was. He took me to a storage unit. FML

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By betamaxjim - 19/11/2012 20:06 - United Kingdom

Today, as I left class, I felt a tug on my rucksack from behind. Thinking it was just someone deliberately dragging me back, I struggled to let myself free and shouted, "Let go!" I looked over my shoulder just to find that one the straps was trapped in the doorhandle. Everyone was in hysterics. FML

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By Awkward - 4/2/2010 16:03 - France

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, claiming moving in was a bad idea and he is the type who needs his privacy. It was his idea to move in, he had to convince me. Now we are stuck, under lease together for the next 6 months. FML

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By Username - 4/4/2011 17:36 - United States

Today, my dad woke me up for the second time to get me ready for school. Wanting me to prove I was really awake, he made me sit up. As soon as he left my room, I dozed off and faceplanted my nightstand. FML

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By Anonymous - 27/2/2016 11:17 - United States

Today, I forgot to bring my lunch to work. I got so hungry, I resorted to eating antacid tablets from the medicine cabinet for lunch. FML

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By Fcuked - 23/3/2011 04:40 - New Zealand

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him 'meow' over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

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By HungerStrike - 29/12/2014 23:28 - Czech Republic - Hostivice

Today, me and some friends had home-made burgers for lunch. The guy who did the cooking later insisted that spitting in a frying pan is a perfectly acceptable way of guessing the right time to add the oil. FML

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By Anonymous - 19/4/2014 01:19 - Norway - Mo I Rana

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

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By Anonymous - 20/7/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, I went out to eat at a restaurant. When the waitress saw me, she continously told me how beautiful and kind I was. Flattered, I just said thank you. Five minutes later, one of the ugliest girls I've ever seen in my life walked in. The waitress told her the same exact things she told me. FML

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By Anonymous - 30/4/2016 06:20 - Australia

Today, I briefly had the coolest boss in the world. He stormed over to a nasty customer who was giving me hell, and he absolutely laid into her. It lasted about 10 seconds before he collapsed from a major heart attack. A coworker's already blamed me for not pacifying the customer in the first place and causing all this to happen. FML

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By polkadotpinup - 16/9/2016 17:22 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I got a call from my employers wanting to ask why I had a no call, no show for today. My supervisor reported me for not showing up to work. It's my day off, and also my birthday. FML

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Top comments

By KingGeorgeGal | 12

#2809421 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:45

Well, I hope they put 'sahne' and not 'samen' in your coffee!

By saIty | 17

#2809440 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

How funny would it be if one of them pulled down their pants, and started beating their ferret?

COMMENTS

By myfruitloop | 0

#2809418 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:44

first

By KingGeorgeGal | 12

#2809421 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:45

Well, I hope they put 'sahne' and not 'samen' in your coffee!

Volcano47 | 0

#2809452 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

well thats a good alternate:)

derper71 | 3

#2809478 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:49

lmao.. would u like some sperm in your coffee sir?

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809499 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:50

actually I think sperm adds flavor

flockz | 19

#2809511 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:51

hmmm thats odd the german guy at my coffee place thinks samen means cream and puts that in my coffee. i wonder why he laughs everytime i take a sip....

shybear15 | 0

#2809545 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:54

yea... I wonder

bravesfan112233 | 0

#2809644 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:01

ya I'd like a medium coffee, hold the sperm

princessjes23 | 6

#2809656 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:03

oh for sure! that would be fun!! =D

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809708 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:09

i'd rather tell them to leave out the sperm instead of holding it while they make my coffee, but that's me

asdfghj771 | 0

#2809880 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:33

likewise

GunnarG9 | 0

#2809891 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:35

52-I love your dawg!

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809981 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:54

thanx dawg

gangssaboo | 0

#2810619 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:30

my moms from Germany....samen means seeds.....not sperm..

msl1333 | 4

#2810664 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:44

Salem does mean seed, but it is often used in the context of "one's seed" as in sperm...also...even if you thought it meant like seeds of a plant, why would that make it better? do you take seeds in your coffee?

ninjasaurous | 0

#2810711 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:54

I don't enjoy this IndiRae person.

die_coco | 0

#2810741 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:57

sperma means sperm, but samen is the german pendant to semen. i'm from austria, i know it ;)

die_coco | 0

#2810752 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:59

ah btw: samen also means seeds^^

UnderJonathan | 8

#2810961 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:50

17- that's messed up!!

KingGeorgeGal | 12

#2810982 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:52

166: But so true (;

adropofpeace | 8

#2811184 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:29

Would you like that salty or sweet?

dolphincheddar | 10

#2811230 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:39

it would be sweet If the guy eats pineapple

JuliaDragonNinja | 0

#2811545 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:57

Pshh i might not be a zombie but im a hell of a Dragon! AND A FUCKING NINJA

criminalmind | 10

#2811784 - Sunday 3 July 2011 9:00

Roomate: Would you like some cream in your coffee? I made it by hand.

ILOLatmockdaweek | 0

#2811840 - Sunday 3 July 2011 9:08

222 ftw

craziechiefsfan | 0

#2812153 - Sunday 3 July 2011 9:38

well then I spread my seeds well lol

KingGeorgeGal | 12

#2812212 - Sunday 3 July 2011 9:47

I'd say salty, but ehh, who doesn't like a little salt in their coffee?

Ali_Br_fml | 33

#2812275 - Sunday 3 July 2011 9:56

it's good to see this one translated in English. These comments on here are so much funnier than those on VDM...(I understand them more in my native language... and we seem to have dirtier minds...)

IscoreOnU | 19

#2812501 - Sunday 3 July 2011 10:35

234- I guess it's lost in translation. It loses value as with all things.

maslover | 0

#2813091 - Sunday 3 July 2011 14:00

144- seeded coffee is the best ;)

thecoolestever1 | 0

#2813811 - Sunday 3 July 2011 16:54

If i plant my seed in the ground, will it make a baby tree?

sexybeast6229 | 0

#2813830 - Sunday 3 July 2011 16:58

don't ruin an fml:0 you're not the one drinking semen.

Nhk_fml | 4

#2818753 - Monday 4 July 2011 15:37

This made me laugh

@141 it can mean sperm also

j_cat187 | 19

#2823154 - Tuesday 5 July 2011 8:57

im salty

006ruler | 0

#2845394 - Friday 8 July 2011 6:26

TheFection | 0

#2847302 - Friday 8 July 2011 12:30

well yeah but sperm is basically the human seed, if ya see what I'm saying. and op, even I know sahne is cream and I never studied German.

fishing12345 | 2

#3207273 - Tuesday 30 August 2011 22:47

Yaa

l23VIVE | 17

#4846684 - Wednesday 22 August 2012 5:29

Das ist nein gut, du willst sahne en koffee. Nein samen

telli164 | 30

#5889766 - Wednesday 19 March 2014 13:15

What?

By princessjes23 | 6

#2809426 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:45

haha! nice.

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809455 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:47

jess. how long have you been a zombie?

princessjes23 | 6

#2809580 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:56

lol! oh only like 4 months... =)

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809606 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:58

oh ok. I also enjoy human brains, they're very nutritious

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809624 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:00

oh cool! I also enjoy human brains, they're very nutritious. maybe we could go on a killing spree together :D

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809647 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:02

damn double posts..

princessjes23 | 6

#2809693 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:07

oh for sure! sounds fun!!! =D

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809717 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:11

alright cool. i have like 8 dead bodies on
my freezer right now if u want an arm or two

princessjes23 | 6

#2810063 - Sunday 3 July 2011 2:15

sweet! I jus might take you up on that offer, thanx

dolphincheddar | 10

#2810082 - Sunday 3 July 2011 2:18

np. so how exactly did you die?

LuLzUnDaTaBrDgE | 0

#2810303 - Sunday 3 July 2011 3:18

gtfo you losers you are why ths websites sucks so bad. go have you bullshit convo somwhere else douchebags.

princessjes23 | 6

#2810321 - Sunday 3 July 2011 3:20

wow rude much? were havin a convo on a comment so u don't even have to look at it. get over urself asshole!!

Codezlol | 21

#2810329 - Sunday 3 July 2011 3:23

Mad troll is mad? You're terrible at it anyways, maybe you should stop.

CryMoreFMLs | 14

#2810562 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:21

I looked into her soul with my face and she saw obliion, so she became a zombie instead.

XXscenekidXX209 | 0

#2810617 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:30

luv the zombie face, i just so happen to be a unicorn

CryMoreFMLs | 14

#2810667 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:45

Oblivion* Fuck my phone.

princessjes23 | 6

#2810672 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:46

ha ya that's exactly what happened.
haha thank u! that's the result of me havin no life. n nice! but u look like a kitty =P

enoughgrace | 4

#2810984 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:52

"Hell's Janitor"

flockz | 19

#2811139 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:20

on a random note, zombie sex is fucking fantastic.

TheBitchOfChuckN | 7

#2811152 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:22

I'm looking to sell some of master Chuck's leftover corpses...we may be able to help each other.

Siji | 0

#2811225 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:38

"Open Season"

dolphincheddar | 10

#2811235 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:42

180. I heard these are very good quality and am willing to make a deal. meet me
in limbo by where they torture babies

princessjes23 | 6

#2811255 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:47

176 knows what's up!!

flockz | 19

#2811296 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:58

why hello there 186 i noticed that u are a zombie.

i like zombies.

princessjes23 | 6

#2811325 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:05

hello ;)

dolphincheddar | 10

#2811333 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:06

me too flock, you can join us in our brutal
manslaughter and cannabalistic feast if you wish

flockz | 19

#2811345 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:08

nope just in it for the sex that's all i want.

dolphincheddar | 10

#2811369 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:12

alright. well I'm into zombies but I'm
not gay, so I shall leave you two to that business. i heard doing it in a coffin undergound is hot.. that or ripping off and reattaching limbs during intercourse. and zombies do not have periods which is
convenient

princessjes23 | 6

#2811383 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:14

downfall to zombie sex=losing body parts =X

flockz | 19

#2811390 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:16

there is nothing like being slapped by a detached arm in the middle of sex. it really.... just brings a feeling nothing else can.

princessjes23 | 6

#2811406 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:19

lmao!

flockz | 19

#2811411 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:21

of course it would have to be a random arm cuz then the sex would be awkward if it was one of our arms. like two beached horny whales.

princessjes23 | 6

#2811486 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:40

agreed haha

valalvax | 13

#2811517 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:49

I love both the kitty face and the zombie face!

valalvax | 13

#2811526 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:52

hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the soft tissues goes first... of which both your *ahem* and *cough* are a part of

(penis and vagina, for those who have already had brain leakage)

flockz | 19

#2811532 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:53

i mean they don't call me the undead lady pleaser for nothing. that title is earned. and trust me when i say i have earned it.

By Elphieba | 4

#2809428 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:45

That would have been akward.

Garyy_fml | 11

#2810604 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:27

next time you get a coffee, they should be like "with or without the sperm?"

coolp3rson | 0

#2811499 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:43

I would prefer the cream

Jacobt24 | 19

#2813055 - Sunday 3 July 2011 13:42

Gotta have your daily protein

atthegates | 0

#2819252 - Monday 4 July 2011 16:59

not an FML.

By YouMentalFreaks | 3

#2809430 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

That Sucks, Op. :/ Maybe they'll just forget about it..? it's probably a common mistake.

mlexi21 | 5

#2810251 - Sunday 3 July 2011 2:59

maybe you'll lose some weight?

NYCM | 6

#2810353 - Sunday 3 July 2011 3:27

That's cold

cheekysausage | 0

#2810367 - Sunday 3 July 2011 3:32

was that comment necessary?

LikeaPRESIDENT | 0

#2810413 - Sunday 3 July 2011 3:44

98 your a douchebag

LikeaPRESIDENT | 0

#2810700 - Sunday 3 July 2011 4:51

anyone smell smoke cuz in think someone just goT BURNED

Hockeyboy4280 | 18

#2810767 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:01

98 is quite the fucking asshole. A word of advice, if you have to point out other people's flaws, it only makes you seem the insecure fuckstick you really are. Besides, she isn't fat. Good one!

Maybe next time you'll make a better joke?

athena3100 | 9

#2810786 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:07

Dont worry hun, you are beautful the way you are and dont let some duche bag guy tell you otherwise.

CateXOX | 0

#2812492 - Sunday 3 July 2011 10:33

Oh yeah, I accidentally ask for semen in my coffee all the time.

"Accidentally"...

DuckfaceSoccerpu | 0

#2816403 - Monday 4 July 2011 2:33

239- maybe OP is still learning German. -.-;.

xNephilim | 18

#6024719 - Friday 1 August 2014 6:12

As a native German, I can say it's not really common but still not that big of a deal.

By orphinz | 3

#2809434 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

I must try that coffee with sperm

yummycupkake | 0

#2809754 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:14

reading your comment in a heavy, funny accent from ur pic made it sound alot more funnier :DD

dolphincheddar | 10

#2809833 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:25

orphinz. comment is very nice, but you have iPod mini, I has iPod regular, everyone knows mini is for girls

bbgisbeautifull | 1

#2810840 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:19

omg is ur pic the guy in borat! :D

dolphincheddar | 10

#2811342 - Sunday 3 July 2011 7:08

what guy in borat. the only guy in borat is borat himself you flubchunt -.-

ILOLatmockdaweek | 0

#2811916 - Sunday 3 July 2011 9:15

192- are your comments always this good or are you just having a moment?

KingGeorgeGal | 12

#2812504 - Sunday 3 July 2011 10:35

229- they are always really good and funny & you just gutta admit that picture of the dog is just just swaggin(;

ILOLatmockdaweek | 0

#2813147 - Sunday 3 July 2011 14:27

242- it's like a doggy pimp.

dolphincheddar | 10

#2814142 - Sunday 3 July 2011 18:52

dogs are awesome

dolphincheddar | 10

#2814280 - Sunday 3 July 2011 19:19

and thanks 242!

tzuriel11 | 9

#2821861 - Tuesday 5 July 2011 2:21

white girl saying its swaggin lmao

By canadian_ftw | 8

#2809438 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

At least you know now, so you won't make a fool of yourself again...

lol_ironic_life | 9

#2809470 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:48

Their ferrret will claw them in the face like the previous FML testing how flexiblity of the ferret's spine.

lol_ironic_life | 9

#2809505 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:50

Crap comment fail...That was meant for #8!

By saIty | 17

#2809440 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

How funny would it be if one of them pulled down their pants, and started beating their ferret?

Lauren10102 | 3

#2809770 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:16

ferret? I don't think that's a thing normal people say....

josh5634 | 0

#2809852 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:28

I think Mr. Salty does.. ?

saIty | 17

#2809866 - Sunday 3 July 2011 1:30

It was an old FML, about a kid getting caught beating his ferret.

Fmls4life | 6

#2810297 - Sunday 3 July 2011 3:16

haha lol that was funny

iluvevil01 | 11

#2810871 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:28

lol I remember reading that fml about the kid beating his ferret.

TheBitchOfChuckN | 7

#2811165 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:24

Very.

Katiekhalifa_fml | 28

#2812712 - Sunday 3 July 2011 11:38

lol the old fml was him spanking his ferret

vfs_fml | 0

#2813797 - Sunday 3 July 2011 16:52

I REMEMBER THAT FML ! ahahha

EagorLuvsBigFoot | 8

#2822114 - Tuesday 5 July 2011 3:50

Yeah it's was deffinetly SPANKING the ferret, I faved that FML

soulfulemo | 0

#2827816 - Wednesday 6 July 2011 0:07

it's not common cause it's a British saying..:P

By AmazingLadyy13 | 0

#2809448 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

Delicious.

athena3100 | 9

#2810797 - Sunday 3 July 2011 5:09

Mm maybe some sperm cakes wail youre at it?

By lol_ironic_life | 9

#2809449 - Sunday 3 July 2011 0:46

So which one did you get in your coffee?! :D Sperm makes everything taste better!

Xx_Dakota_xX | 1

#2811074 - Sunday 3 July 2011 6:05

sperm is full protein so it would be good for OP