Kids: Today, while babysitting, I gave the boy a pen and paper because...

By thesitter - 10/05/2009 13:18 - United States

Today, while babysitting, I gave the boy a pen and paper because he wanted to draw me. When he was done, he let me see but then said, "Wait! I'm not done." He took it back and basically colored in the arms. I said, "I'm not wearing long-sleeves." He said, "That's hair." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 337

You deserved it 8 174

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 13:33 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 533

You deserved it 7 926

By YAABOIII - 05/04/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, the 7 year old boy I was babysitting studied my upper lip and said "It's okay, my daddy won't let me shave yet either." I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 219

You deserved it 8 808

By anonymous - 26/01/2013 08:42 - United States - Fairbanks

Today, while babysitting my neighbors' kids, their oldest son used a paint pen on the carpet. The boy blamed me and I got fired. He's only 3 and can barely talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 205

You deserved it 5 652

Chilling

By BondingTime - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Paul

Today, I was babysitting my nephew and we decided to color together. He drew a picture of someone who looked dead, almost zombie-like, while everyone else looked pretty normal. When I asked who it was, he said in a serious, scary voice, "It's you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 366

You deserved it 4 206

He has issues

By just a joke - 08/06/2020 20:08

Today, I playfully drew thick eyebrows on my one-year-old son to make him look like a cartoon villain. He laughed cutely in the mirror as I took some adorable pictures. When my husband saw, he threw such a horrendous fit about boys and makeup, I was reduced to tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 680

You deserved it 365

By Anonymous - 19/04/2009 18:42 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a 5-year-old girl and we were coloring. She made me a card that was very sweet, so I smiled. She looked at me and went "Don't smile, your smile is really scary." FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 716

You deserved it 5 305

Thanks, hun

By Anonymous - 03/12/2010 00:47 - United States

Today, at work, one of my 6 year-old students, who has had intense speech therapy since kindergarten, told me, "I can tell you're hot, because you rolled your sleeves up." I was very pleased with his articulate sentence, until he said, "Your arms are hairy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 430

You deserved it 4 388

By jwolt92 - 25/10/2016 02:27 - United States - Bourbonnais

Today, I felt something wet and warm on my arm. I looked down and saw a kid with his mouth attached to my arm. Didn't expect that out of a third grader. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 625

You deserved it 707

By ellieowenie - 29/07/2012 08:11 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 758

You deserved it 3 439

By Anonymous - 02/03/2012 08:30 - Belgium

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year-old brat. He refused to eat his vegetables, so I forbade him from playing until they were finished. He stomped off upstairs, so I let him cool off for a couple of minutes. When I went upstairs, he had taken scissors to all of his mother's clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 601

You deserved it 4 432

ryvenna 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:07

He could've drawn a mustache instead~ Or a unibrow.

leilaostara 1

Thursday 23 February 2012 22:56

It's a child you retard that's horrible.

Comments

tozfeekum 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:02

hahha, are you a girl or guy?

b182link 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 19:02

girl, look in the top right corner

Ben12345_fml 18

Monday 3 August 2015 7:43

If it was a guy why would it matter?

leero 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:03

haha that sucks. I totally know how you feel though :/

Jcsati8 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:03

Nair and a razor would do.........

username_no34536 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:06

#1, I don't think it'd be an FML if the OP was a guy. Kids are funny.

ryvenna 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:07

He could've drawn a mustache instead~ Or a unibrow.

boomBOOMshake 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:07

Arm hair is normal. Don't feel too bad.

SarcasticUnicorn 9

Thursday 16 August 2012 7:11

Yeah, exactly. But if it really does bother you, there are many ways to get rid of those little hairs.

PureGold 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:09

Aww :( Kids and their honesty. But I can totally relate lol.

yummkathycakes 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:10

Now it's your turn to draw a portrait of him back :) Give him a smaller dick :)

leilaostara 1

Thursday 23 February 2012 22:56

It's a child you retard that's horrible.

Phallus_fml 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:10

What an observant kid! Say thank you!

MmmHotWaffles 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 20:13

reminds me of Napoleon Dynamite.. when he drew that chick with hair on her upper lip haha.

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Love Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, I got home from visiting my long-distance girlfriend. I spent $366 to get a plane ticket to visit her for the week. The day after I arrived there, she broke up with me and I had to buy a ticket for an earlier flight home. With fees and penalties, I paid around $550 to be broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 713

You deserved it 5 223

Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 132

You deserved it 2 823

Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 527

You deserved it 5 330

Today, my father picked me up from the police academy I'm attending, and got caught speeding. The officer was my drill instructor, and I had to do push-ups on the side of the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 102

You deserved it 5 191

Today, I’m convinced my son has some sort of radar. Literally every time my partner and I try to have sex, he wakes up and interrupts us. At first I thought it was a coincidence, but the fact that it’s happened at 12am, 12pm, 6am and 3pm tells me otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 402

You deserved it 230

Today, while at the gym, I started flirting with a hot doctor. I thought things were going well so I suggested we work out together sometime and maybe work our way up to dinner together, to which she replied, "Sorry but I've seen tumors bigger than your biceps," and then walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 009

You deserved it 2 100

Today, I found out the truth about my parents’ divorce and why our family is so distant. Turns out my dad had an affair with not one, but two of my mom’s sisters. And that my youngest cousin is also my half-sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 365

You deserved it 153

Same thing different taste

Chilling

He has issues

Thanks, hun

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