Today we tried to have sex for the first time but I got so excited...

By too dumb for sex - 16/03/2019 22:00

Today we tried to have sex for the first time but I got so excited my blood pressure shot up and I got a nosebleed that didn't fully stop for nearly 30 minutes. Then when we tried again she accidentally headbutted me. The new bleeding still hasn't stopped and I'm feeling very lightheaded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 200

You deserved it 247

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tounces7 27

Sunday 17 March 2019 0:05

Maybe just try lying on your back. It sounds like any other position might be too strenuous anyway.

RichardPencil 30

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Saturday 16 March 2019 22:21

How old are you? 80?

Comments

RichardPencil 30

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Saturday 16 March 2019 22:21

How old are you? 80?

tounces7 27

Sunday 17 March 2019 0:05

Maybe just try lying on your back. It sounds like any other position might be too strenuous anyway.

Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15

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Sunday 17 March 2019 0:35

some things just aren't meant to be, like you getting laid😂

BurnInDemonFire 33

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Sunday 17 March 2019 3:05

Either you're on meds that are thinning your blood, or your girlfriend/wife/fuck buddy has a head made out of adamantium. If you're having long-lasting nosebleeds, don't just sit there complaining you're "woozy as fuck", go see a doctor, because you literally need your head examined.