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By  livgasms  |  4

wait til you smell them cooking the placenta

By  Thanatos1206  |  0

They're trying to birth a home?? That's freaky.

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By  livgasms  |  4

wait til you smell them cooking the placenta

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  OkayImSorry  |  0

And you wait until you smell me cooking the baby.

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  GoneClubbin  |  9

that's even grosser u freak baby killer

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  GoneClubbin  |  9

WTF THEY DON'T EAT IT THEY THROW IT AWAY U FREAK TARD!

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  cocobulla1  |  4

I agree with GoneClubbin!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  FTWaffles  |  2

Eh actually the placenta is rich of nutrients that keeps hormones out of wack and decreases the chances of depression after birth, hence why people eat em. There are actually cook books for them lol.. bio class @_@

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  awardZu  |  0

Them: *scream* You : 'Hello, 911? Yes, I think my neighbors are killing eachother, the woman is screaming in pain...' Then wait for the cops to kick the door in, while you sit back and laugh.

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  misssoccer  |  0

128 home births are really a bad idea because of the comments listed above some hospitals do have rooms where you can do the whole home birthing thing but a midwife monitors you and the baby so you don't have serious complications

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  bishopb95  |  5

Actually, home births are only a bad idea if the mother is high risk. For women who are low risk, home births are perfectly ok. Before hospitals, women were having home births all of the time.

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  bishopb95  |  5

Many people with dehydrate the placenta and encapsulate them so mothers can take their placentas in pill form. It helps with post-partum depression, OCD, and many other things. It also enriches the breast milk and has even helped stop post birth bleeding.

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I think giving birth at home is a great idea because the on-your-back position is the worst position to give birth in because it causes the most pain and is the most difficult. Not to mention, the only reason why doctors tell you to push is because they have to be somewhere else. You shouldn't push until you're blue in the face. You shouldn't be on your back and then you should let gravity take its course...

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  ladybugobgyn  |  0

128, giving birth at home is a GREAT idea, especially when there is a nice big shoulder dystocia, tight nuchal cords, post partum hemorrhages and fetal respiratory distress. It seems perfectly reasonable to just let whatever happens happen. maybe you would enjoy a nice big seizure as well? Sign me up!!

By  Thanatos1206  |  0

They're trying to birth a home?? That's freaky.

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  Ugi  |  26

It's not freaky at all - it's only in the last few decades that most people in the "civilised" world have tried to give birth lying down in a hospital bed. The only advantage of that is for the doctor rather than for the mother. My wife gave birth to our first daughter in our living room (sitting on my lap). The midwife commented on how good a way it was to open the pelvis and she needed only gas & air and no stitches after. Second daughter was born in even more casual fashion, again at home with only a touch of gas. We actually went in to the ward to get her checked out & then went home again for the birth! Why add the stress of a hospital ward and unfamiliar surroundings. So long as you are within a mad-dash for the hospital in the event of an emergency (which is much less common at home anyway) then it can only be a good thing.

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  Ithiaca  |  3

Agreed, if more people start doing research before the birth of their child. They will find that a homebirth is not to so freaky or outrageous. Women have been giving birth for several thousand years. The practice of having a doctor in attendance is approximately 100 years. Why do you need a Surgeon to do something that your body knows how to do?

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  Ugi  |  26

I agree with you, but to be fair women have been dying in child-birth for a long time too! The thing is that these days you can have a very good idea of whether the baby is lying as it should be and can have expert midwives on hand to help. Any complications and you can be in hospital by the time they have prep'ed a theatre for you anyway.

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  Ithiaca  |  3

There in lays the solution. Sadly there have been cases where the Hospitals have given issues to a family coming in to the Hospital with an emergency birth or issue with the birth and the reception has been less then friendly. As the Hospital treats the home birthers as some sort of fringe (Crunchy-New Age-Granola chewing) nuts and it serves them right that they had an issue with their birth.

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  Ugi  |  26

38 - where we were (Hertfordshire, UK) the home birth thing was all planned in coordination with the hospital and the midwives. We knew who would be coming for the birth and where we would go if there was an issue. They coordinated with the hospital so that we were "on the books" in the event of an emergency. It just happened that they were very pro-home birth where we were and had it all sussed out. We are by no means new-age nuts, both being science PhDs.

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  dreamering  |  16

There are lots of things that can go wrong during this process. It's true that throughout the history, humans gave birth in every place but in a hospital. However, it's true as well that the child mortality was very high compare to now. Only in the last month, two people I know personally have their babies in the ICU. Years ago these babies would't have survived. I got the joke and I lost 2 pounds typing all this crap on IPhone.

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  ColorfulDonut  |  7

108- ikr I have no idea how these guys have the time or the will power to type these long things... or maybe they are on computers and type fast... idk but we dont need to know your life story.. no offense ??°°?(?_?)?°°??

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  dreamering  |  16

Lalalady, there is a reason why in developed countries, only a very small % of people give birth at home. Saying, it's not risky at all, makes me just to say Wow. No further comment.

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  EmyB_fml  |  8

yes, the child mortality used to be high, but now there are experienced midwives that have gone to college, classes to prepare for birth, new techniques..... So many improvements in home birhs that you cannot compare homebirhing now to it 100 years ago !

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I'm sorry, I don't need a whole lecture on which method proves better or worse, I come on FML for the laughs. And since most of these comments on #3's humorous reply aren't exactly laugh out loud material, well of course I won't read it

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  DGross  |  8

I birthed a bike before...and almost birthed a shed...but in a bad storm the shed collapsed and killed my bike...now FML is all I have left :-P

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deaths in the middle ages after childbirth were quite often due to infection from things Like midwife wiping her ass, not cleaning her hands then sticking her hand up a Womans twat to check for baby's head. malnutrition, exhaustion etc etc

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  knightsfb  |  0

155 no one is forcing you to read this..if it's not making you laugh move to the next comment...some people are talking about these methods because it is interesting to them..if it's not interesting to you, don't tell us that because we don't care!

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you see these people are what we call "tools" they have no clue when to shut up and thought they should "enlighten" us with their home birth facts, when, in reality nobody gives a crap and it was all a joke anyway.

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  ladybugobgyn  |  0

I totally agree! Also, don't forget to forgo your prenatal care, immunizations for the baby, and anything else you feel would be better, since your body can do it all!! It seems so strange that I have seen so many emergencies stopped from becoming tragic outcomes by medical intervention. But doctors, nurses and other medical professionals are just nonsensical!! Let's all go out and "let our bodies take care of it"!!!! certainly this would help with overpopulation. have at it!!!

By  mikelovesbubes  |  0

get a baby cooking and do it in there house

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  GrahamAker  |  3

That's very unkind to give birth in apartment/townhouse/cardboard Box without any warning I would call the cops for the loud noises when I'm trying to sleep. I don't give a fuck where u give birth just don't Bother me about it. that's why the OP complained. I would actually smoke alot of shit and cause fires and bang on the floors.

By  Astroman129  |  7

Kesha: "When I was born I was covered in glitter and I ate my own placenta. I also came out of my mom's butthole. Vaginal birth is for people who want to play by the rules.

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  gardianlh24  |  0

Who fucking listens to Ke$ha? You can't even pronounce the fucking dollar sign!! What, is it Ke-dollar-ha? She fucking sucks at singing. Autotone is all she uses. Grow up and listen to real music like Rock.

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  Soloman212  |  28

Yeah, covering your ears suffocates your brain! Don't do it! just stick to the head-smashing to be safe. If you're doing it hard enough the sound should muffle out the birthing anyways.

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  slimjim9876  |  0

please refrain from hitting any body parts against the wall, as it may cause damage to the wall. if you find you must strike any body part to a wall brick is the suggested surface if choice (for greater impact)

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