By and she blames me -_- - 13/10/2013 21:50 - Canada - Calgary

Today, some ass-bandit broke into my house by smashing a window, just so he could steal the ancient VHS cassette player that my wife wouldn't let me throw away. Thanks, scumbag, but the front door was unlocked. FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 264
You deserved it 4 343

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That bastard how else are you gonna watch Disney tapes now? :(


He steals asses

michaelaranda 28

this doesn't really sound like an associated bandit, it seems more like op trying to cover up that HE got rid of the vcr. or it was an ass bandit. sorry about all the ass bandits op.

They run about the same... - *takes off glasses in dramatic fashion* 'Dat ass' *steals everything associated with that ass*

22- leave that to Perdix.

TheCaramelKing 11

Swiggity swoogy I'm coming for that booty.

I didn't even have to look at the location thing on the FML to know this was in Canada. "The front door was unlocked" was all it took

right. that's a new one.

\ 28

"Ass-" is a prefix used to intensify an adjective or to demonize a noun.

Damn....wish I knew that the front door was open

Leaving your door open, no matter how "safe" your neighborhood is, is just stupid. Locks are there for a reason - use it - because you never know!! (And yeah, I am also from Canada)

As a Canadian not true.

LilFlutter 10

B-double O-T-Y, can't get it off my mind!

incoherentrmblr 21

Comes back to kick your door in. Waits until you get a new one, does it again three weeks later...

incoherentrmblr 21

Did he get away in a car that has "assman" for license plate?

JMichael 25

34- you can have it ;)

bandeek 30

I'm American and i leave my front door unlocked.

warriorartemis 11

Yes, as opposed to rump-ranger.

yesterday night I feel asleep with the door unlocked all night.

aron666 25

Like one of the Jiggle-butts.

Ass-Bandit and Crotch-Thief. Break in and make a daring escape! Quick to the ass hole!

45 - I also live in Canada, in a rather peaceful neighbourhood, and I still have enough sense to lock my door at all times. (You can tell I'm from Canada by the way I spelled "neighbourhood".)

justawallflower 27

Umm...he obviously robs booties.

GAH REALLY #93!?!?!?!?!?!

Ass-bandit. I like it.

HeyHeyFishFillet 34

One of the many reasons I love FML. I get to learn new insults every day!

Ass bandit is old, come out from your rock.

You're being an ass-bandit. Go back under yours.

That bastard how else are you gonna watch Disney tapes now? :(

I have VHS tapes... Just not a player for them...

go to goodwill?

I couldn't find any the last few times I went...

really? they have tons where I live o3o

DVD or online? get creative here :p

I would steal a VHS player... But I would check the doors first...

I would pay you to take my VHS player. It has less value than a door stop at this point.

incoherentrmblr 21

To hell with VHS, time to bring Beta Max back.

But if he had gone through the front door she definitely would not believe you that it was stolen..

\ 28

#96 Stop living in 1989! Beta is DEAD and VHS is where it's at.

Why the heck would she blame you o.o?

Angelrose2004 17

Maybe because he wanted to throw it away and she wouldn't let him. Hence, why she would think that he set it up to be stolen.

That makes sense. Heck, bitches be crazy nowadays...assuming OP would set up a whole robbery, whilst breaking a window, just to get rid of the damn thing O.o

I'm more worried about how poor their home security is.

Infamous_Tora 12

NOT THE VHS!! What has this world come to?!

So your FML is that he broke the window and not how much trouble your gonna be in with your wife lol.

Ass-bandit is a wonderful word. That really does suck, OP. I once had someone break into my house to steal cookies and ramen noodles. Look on the bright side, at least they only took that! Hopefully it doesn't cost too much to replace the window.

skyttlz 32

My house has been broken into but they took the wii, my moms iPad, jewelry, and cash.

That's very unfortunate. Punk ass ass-bandits.

Frostie13 11

so I think it was probably some very confused potheads that went in and took ur cookies and ramen lol

He did you a favor well except for the window.

It was a hipster heist

That was my first thoughts on this one!