Miscellaneous: Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and...

By Deadcat101 - 10/07/2012 23:26 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa, and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 038

You deserved it 1 934

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/05/2014 16:05 - United States - New York

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 853

You deserved it 4 365

By sucks_brah - 25/12/2009 07:25 - United States

Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 277

You deserved it 2 514

Get out

By Anonymous - 10/08/2014 17:24 - Germany - Würzburg

Today, my mother kicked me out of the house because her new boyfriend needs my room. Evidently he also needs my credit card, passport, and wallet too, because she kept all three, while tossing everything else out on the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 222

You deserved it 3 240

By FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 673

You deserved it 121

By Anonymous - 04/03/2014 04:12 - United States - Woodland

Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 153

You deserved it 3 206

By myself - 30/01/2012 05:24 - Canada

Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from too much alcohol, my 2-year-old alone and locked in the bathroom, and my house in a complete wreck. To top it off, it's the day my mother-in-law, who hates me, is coming to visit from New York. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 357

You deserved it 3 952

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 20:00

Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 444

You deserved it 213

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 22:24 - Canada - Sackville

Today, my crazy drug-addict mother kicked me out of the house after siding with my crazy, drug-addict aunt, who'd just threatened to slit my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 079

You deserved it 2 009

By thatguy - 25/06/2011 07:47 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 728

You deserved it 2 983

By anonymous - 07/02/2012 09:27 - United States

Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 285

You deserved it 2 343

maliki32 7

Wednesday 11 July 2012 9:13

I feel so sorry for you, OP. Nobody should ever have to go through any of that!

GothicAngel17 24

Wednesday 11 July 2012 9:25

Stupid woman, vibrators are expensive! (For those who are retarded, it's a damn joke)

Comments

Irishgypsy 2

Wednesday 11 July 2012 13:38

Did she piss on your cat as well??

parshal 2

Wednesday 11 July 2012 13:39

Eww u dont deserve a mother like tht

laden_swallow09 34

Wednesday 11 July 2012 13:56

It's "caught", every time. No such word as "catched".

AgaveLoco 5

Wednesday 11 July 2012 14:07

Maybe she wants a bigger vibrator

chupachup_fml 0

Wednesday 11 July 2012 15:11

her little boyfriend doesn't satisfy her enough -.- corrupted world

MexicanGinger 5

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:25

BURN!!!!! xD

momo1972 3

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:28

She's a keeper!!!! Lol

jim_bolicious 4

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:50

Another example of why weed is better than booze

CamberwellCarrot 8

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:50

Do you live in the Sunnyvale Trailer Park by any chance?

Nbrandwine 7

Wednesday 11 July 2012 17:24

One word. Rehab

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Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 849

You deserved it 7 890

Today, I need a remote position due to a disability, but no company will even try to work with me. My car just died. I'll never be able to live on my own, despite being 30. The worst part? All the people who are gonna reply and call me "entitled." FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 133

The Top

Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 988

You deserved it 5 363

Today, at my surprise birthday party, my neighbor gave me a new dog collar. My dog was run over by him a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 106

You deserved it 110

Today, I was unloading things into a hotel. As I went to get a bag out in the hallway, the room door closed and I had no key. When I knocked and asked my family to let me back in, no one answered. The doors are clearly not soundproof. I could hear them debating whether or not to let me back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 431

You deserved it 4 076

Today, I was at work at McDonald's, at the front counter when an elderly lady came up to me and whispered, "I just shit everywhere in your restroom," then turned around and walked out the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 746

You deserved it 123

Today, I was in a work meeting because our clientele is unhappy with our service. I was in there because I don't correct our customers when they get my name wrong. My name is Blane, but "Blair", "Blake", "Lane", and "Glenn" got rave reviews. No one picked up on this. I hate my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 268

You deserved it 4 293

Today, as a going away present after five years of military service and one combat tour, the hospital scheduled me for a prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 030

You deserved it 4 000

Same thing different taste

Get out

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