Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML
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Top comments
By
isabelf
| 17
your boyfriend sounds like he has some very odd fetishes...
By
nhormuss
| 17
He's a keeper
COMMENTS
By
nhormuss
| 17
He's a keeper
Reply
Queen_bee1234
| 21
This comment is getting pretty old.
Reply
Garrison21
| 11
Hey at least you got some.
Reply
elly94
| 23
Comment moderated for rule-breaking..
Show it anyway
Reply
incoherentrmblr
| 21
Just start start talking like Jabba the Hutt, I think he'll understand then...
Reply
TheSwegMaster69
| 11
Just don't do bondage Leia style.
Reply
rachangie
| 19
Why not do bondage Leia style? What's wrong with that?
Reply
TheSwegMaster69
| 11
Because it will end in death, have you not seen Star Wars?
Reply
Vagitarian1
| 10
y I DoghQo'!!!!
Translation - Don't be silly.
Translation - Don't be silly.
Reply
Vagitarian1
| 10
y IDogh Qo!!!
Translation - Don't be silly.
Translation - Don't be silly.
Reply
shanebob
| 15
If you read the FML, it clearly says that she didn't...
By
isabelf
| 17
your boyfriend sounds like he has some very odd fetishes...
Reply
almightyteapot
| 8
Aren't all fetishes a bit on the stranger side? They all kind of vary between 'ehh, that's a bit weird, but oh well, what ever floats your little boat' and 'holy macaroni, there is definitely something wrong with you, let me just call an exorcist real quick'
Reply
isabelf
| 17
not all fetishes, such as fishnets or blonde hair fetishes, etc.
Reply
kingdomgirl94
| 28
Kinky is using a feather, perverted is using the whole chicken.
Know the limits, play within it.
Know the limits, play within it.
Reply
onlychildFTW
| 33
Well Klingons are known for their rough sex. He must like being rough.
By
LizReszke
| 11
I say this on the moderation list and said yes, and now it got posted. Sweet.
Reply
Queen_bee1234
| 21
Do you want a round of applause?
Reply
igive
| 29
Almost as bad as "First!"
Reply
Enslaved
| 36
Hey, I also get happy when I moderate FMLs and they get posted. I feel that I'm helping by doing a small part to keep this site great.(:
Good for you #3 Way too many people like keeping others down when they say positive things.
Good for you #3 Way too many people like keeping others down when they say positive things.
Reply
Brandi_Faith
| 33
She's new guys, give her a break.
Reply
BBeffedmylife
| 28
41 and 43, I always love to see your comments! Love your positivity!
Reply
metalcrazed
| 21
Not really,the ones I vote yes on are hardly every posted even though they sound realistic and are relatable.
I think that person is right to be happy.
I think that person is right to be happy.
By
liffagain
| 16
Or... he could teach you some naughty Klingon :P
By
woainishamu
| 21
Learn from the guy in the movie Daddy Daycare.
By
kinky44
| 28
Step 1: Learn Klingon
Step 2: Talk to boyfriend
Step 3: ??????
Step 4: Profit
Step 2: Talk to boyfriend
Step 3: ??????
Step 4: Profit
Reply
marcranger
| 28
"Profit" would be more of a Ferengi thing.
Reply
clemsi
| 20
instructions unclear, leg stuck in garbage disposal
Reply
metalcrazed
| 21
Not really if he gets so upset over minor things it may be best for her to move on.
Reply
mrnipples7311
| 13
My dick got caught in the ceiling fan
Reply
Earths_Venus
| 25
Didn't know you could get something that small stuck in a ceiling fan...
Reply
cjwayy
| 22
BUUUUURRRRNNN!
By
gunda95
| 11
YDI, mIw vIlIj, 'ej wej tlhIngan vISov
Translated:
YDI, for not knowing Klingon
Translated:
YDI, for not knowing Klingon
Reply
domolovesyoshi
| 33
yeah because everyone knows klingon, that's something they should have talked about before they got intimate
Reply
MidnaLink
| 32
Also, not everybody is INTO Star Trek.
Reply
gunda95
| 11
LOOL, I'm not into Star Trek.. Bing translator also translates to Klingon.
Reply
_purepxrcelain_
| 6
MAYBE some people just want a normal relationship, not some bullshit language.
By
midamisenju
| 12
Hes a special guy i tell ya
By
alex_622
| 22
Guess you'll be learning Klingon instead of Spanish now
By
Michael2687
| 9
You need a new man.