By SingleGirl - United Kingdom
Today, my mum grounded me for going to my boyfriend's house instead of the library. She said my boyfriend's mum phoned up because she could hear us having it off in his room. When I denied it my mum shouted at me for being a liar as well as a slut. I did go to the library. FML
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  NippsSlipps  |  10

Wtf is wrong with you?!
That someone deserves to be cheated on if they weren't good looking?
You're probably a lard ass munching on doughnuts as you're typing.

Grow up you douche, learn how to be sensitive.

  NippsSlipps  |  10

You're probably a barbie who got dumped from her boyfriend for a much more appealing person.

Go take a long look in the mirror before you start judging people for not being attractive.

  Jincos  |  0

#40, yeah you invented it indeed, but that doesn't mean you branch off of it. Learn to use mother or father instead of 'mum', I wanna hit you in the face whenever I see mum.

  gummibehrs  |  4

You fail to amuse me with your stupidity, Unregistered.

She deserves bad things because she doesn't talk like you? For that, she's lucky because you must be one of the biggest idiots I've ever had the misfortune to stumble across on this website.

Let me explain something to you, and hopefully that blank space of air in your head that you call a brain will find a way to absorb the information. You see, everybody's cultures and languages are not the same as your own. People speak differently. In the UK, "mum" is widely used. So stop being an ignorant dumbass (if that's possible) because no one wants to be sickened by your stupidity anymore.

  Puolukka  |  4

Well, actually English refers to someone from England whereas British could be anyone from the British Isles, including Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland...and since back in the day the other 4 countries used to speak Gaelic rather than English and even their version of English greatly differed from the "proper" English, saying "the English invented the English language" is not all that wrong :P


you know what, the country is no longer called England nor is it called Britain. Second of all, mum is slang/vernacular for you're whole argument is pointless

  ghostgirll  |  0

unregistered fails miserably.
to add to everyone else who brought him/her down
it's actually not 'mom' in every other english-speaking country.
new zealand, australia, england, and parts of canada are just a few that use 'mum' instead of 'mom'.

PS. #53, go make a play-date with unregistered.


I use Mum, Ma, and Mom. I'm from North America too! Oh, shocker!

Anyway OP:
That blows. You get in trouble for having a boyfriend cheat on you. Your mother thinks you were doing something you shouldn't... God damn, your boyfriend (or ex now, I would think) is going to have to explain A LOT.


#74---If those two go on a playdate together, who's going to supervise them? Little children should be watched over at all times. They might hurt themselves with their stupidity!

English isn't the only language that changed when it branched off in other colonies. Spain "invented" the Spanish language, but they pronounce some letters differently and use different words to get the same concept across than the Spanish-speaking countries of Latin America.
I don't know why we make such a big deal over the difference between the different forms of English. If you can understand what they're saying, there's not a problem. If you can't understand them, look it up.


No no no, if you edit it to dad then the trolls will win the Internet! O.o Just feed Unregistered those cute little dinosaur shaped cookies, but keep the mum part of the FML the same!

  Starchild21  |  3

Bullshit the mod would probably change it to "Dud" or something instead of Dad

mOm is the correct spelling


  kewlcat  |  0


up until i was about 11-12 i called my mother "mama"
now i call her mom but i learned 'mama' from when i lived in holland then picked up "mom" when i moved to canada.

  Colombus_fml  |  0

Well, you might have invented the language, but we perfected it and came up with more practical words. The Chinese invented pasta, but the best pasta's Italian.

  take_a_moment  |  0

OMFG unregistered, why don't you come down here to Australia (where we use Mum by the way, and bloody proud of it) and use "Mom" in your gay american accent and we'll show you what a true broken face looks like ya loud muth fucking retard!!

  gummibehrs  |  4

Yes, Unregistered. That's what the Irish are. Funny to me that I'm not drunk at all, nor know any alcoholics, and must have a hundred times your IQ.

Way to prove yourself, once again, to be the biggest idiot ever. And try proper grammar sometime, if that's possible, so that maybe people can decipher your gibberish.

  CFR  |  0

A face full of broken eh #90? I think saying "mum" sounds less obnoxious than "MOM!!!! People on FML are burying my comments again!"

  tab_ga1990  |  0

Unregistered. You, my friend, are in the group of people that give America a bad rep.
Wouldn't be so bad if we didn't have idiots like you.

No country is useless.

And who cares what "Patriotic Americans" think when it comes to accents. I like my country, and it wouldn't be gay if your and your ignorant group of people didn't exist.

You hate them saying the comments about your country, but you are saying so much worse about other countries.

  CDS09  |  0

what #141 said...

I'm American, I dont care if you say mom, mum, mother, ma, mama, whatever....WHO CARES

Poor OP
Poor people who actually get pissed at slight differences in words and accents and want to hand out (if thats the right term) "faces full of broken".

Differences make the world fun! If someone isn't speaking in a foreign language while pointing at you, then let it go.

  bickymonster  |  0

I think you will find that the word Mum predates mom, so actually if you want to get all upity about it, it is the americans that have it "wrong" but personally i just think that there are just mulitple ways of expressing the same thing.

  Unregistered  |  0

lmao you guys haha trying to prove a point about how "ignorant" i am and "uncultured" lmao thats funny because ive lived in 4 countries so you can suck it.

I was born and raised in Cyprus (Learned Greek)
I stayed with my grandma in Russia (Learned Russian)
I moved to Czech Republic (Learned Czech)
I moved to Canada (Learned English/French)
Ive traveled to Egypt/France/Brazil and Japan

and guess what? Im 14! The fact that you are all probably older then 14 and have only traveled to a neighbouring city is pretty sad hey? guess what maybe you should get fucking cultured and auctually travel somewhere and not sit in your god dam house searching that shit on the web

So its pretty funny how you can call me uncultured after ive fucking traveled half the globe while you probably havent gone so far as to get out of your tri-state area

btw if you havent fucking noticted I AM TROLL-IN-G god dam you guys are fucking retarded please read the comments before you "do the thumbs down" and bury it honestly your fighting me because I said mum isnt the right way to say mom lmao


Ha, way to be presumptuous. I'm from North Wales and have been all over the UK and lived in England for four terms in college. I've been to France, Spain, Italy, Greece, Germany, Holland, Belgium, and Austria. I can speak Welsh, English, French, and German. So before you decide for yourself that no one is as cultured as you are, you should rethink decisions based on assumptions.

And by the way, trolling is pretty pathetic.

  mo_the_owl  |  0

I really think we need to start recognizing that people nit-pick to start these conflicts. Anyone who's honestly never heard "mum" lives under a rock.

Don't feed the trolls.

  Intoxicunt  |  5


Anyone can be. The red link at the top of the site saying "moderate the FMLs" is how you become one. You do it for however long you like, then quit.

There are also the FML staff that have the power to edit comments, FML posts, etc. They are marked by "(FML staff)" with their username and a red ribbon on their comments.

  take_a_moment  |  0

LOL oh this is a great debate! it's sad that down here in Oz most of our youth have been copying the yanks and a lot of their culture though. i'd much rather, dare i say it, that we copy the Poms! I know right, i never thought i'd say that lol and i know that not all americans are as bad as the stereotype but fuck there are a lot that are! how many of you americans have actually been out of your country or own a passport? you guys actually think that kangaroos hop down the streets of our main cities, i love that one lol oh and just a question for the poms on here,(completely off topic btw) i can't quite understand why you guys make such a big deal over winning the ashes? you celebrate it for weeks and give your cricketers medals for christs sake, make the most of it while you can i guess :P hehe, peace!

  take_a_moment  |  0

oh and to #185 'aquilo'; at least they have a sense of humor and know that there is actually life Outside of the USA! shit i can't believe i actually stood up for you poms then lol

  mo_the_owl  |  0

#188: I'm an American and I have a passport. I've lived in both Germany and France and speak both languages and I've traveled to Italy, Switzerland, England, Austria, Belgium, most of the Caribbean and much of Central America, as well.
-Oh, and I sure as hell don't think you have fucking kangaroos on your main streets.

Please do us of us a favor and try not to buy into all of the anti-American propaganda.
I am embarrassed to say I'm from the same country as these ignorant loudmouths but I think it's safe to say that if I went to Australia it would take far less than a day to find at least one narrow-minded dumb ass.

  gummibehrs  |  4

Aquilo, do you know what the hell you're even talking about?

Well, I'm from Ireland and I've vacationed in Chicago, Los Angeles, Cancun, and Tokyo. Last summer I had an internship in New York City.

And no, I don't know any redneck-y drunken potato-farmers.

  mo_the_owl  |  0

sorry, i meant "main city streets".
In the bush I can definitely imagine that.

I, myself, had a mountain lion in my yard once haha
-though i didn't try to keep it as a pet. ;]


Just because the Americans raped OUR language and turned it into an ugly thing, full of awful spelling and a whiney accents. Us brits can't help that, it's not our fault, other english speaking places have to go along with what the American version is, because let's face it, 9 out of 10 yanks are far too stupid to understand english if it was spoken and spelled properly. A good day to you. I feel sorry for all you American's with a brain, it's the useless internet morons and George Bush and his followers that give you a bad name.


you know whats ultimately ironic about this language/dialect debate? Mom is the proper Old English way of referring to your mother, the word Mum being a slang term developed by the cockney slums of England in the Victorian Era. For some double irony, the nation of America is a direct descendant of England as the English were the first dominant settlers of North America (the Spanish exempted), meaning that the American language is indeed derived from England, or in a more derrogative way of stating which you people will most likely understand, the English indeed "own" the American language. YET, the Americans have retained the proper Old English way of referring to their Mothers.

So i guess you both win, and you both lose. But i can't really talk, as i am also part of this irony. I'm Australian, therefore I am a descendant of the convicts from England, yet Australia, statistically, is now a much better place to live. Hooray for living on Planet Irony

  sandwichbait  |  0

Dammit #227, where were you before the flame war started? How many people couldn't resist responding to something that obvious?....Well...I learned something. About history and language. I could use this as research someday. -.- Anywayz...I'm gonna pwn all of you. Muhahahhaa-
"A wise man speaks because he has something to say; a fool because he has to say something"
Gotta love proverbs.~~♪

By  ireply_w_lyrics  |  0

"...'Cause I'll be there in the back of your mind
From the day we met to the very last night
And it's just too bad you've already had the best days
The best days of your..."

Because I'm assuming you dumped him :D