Today, my mother yelled at me for standing too close to the microwave. Her reason? The radiation was going to seep through, kill my sperm and cause cancer. FML
Add a comment - Reply to : #
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account
Sign in
Top comments
By
alaskababy907
| 11
Hey, I heard that if you stand too close to the microwave you can get cancer from the radiation in those things. You should probably stay away from them...
By
thatgirlinoregon
| 21
I wonder how much 'kimotherapy' costs? Less than chemotherapy, perhaps?
COMMENTS
By
SettoFail
| 9
HAHA
Reply
trollfaced
| 2
She probably got it from that one south park episode, your mom is so gullible.
Reply
A100893
| 30
Through her reasoning, it seems the radiation has already killed half of her brain cells.
Reply
GovernorGeneral
| 8
Baha my mother once (ok more than once) yelled at me for looking at the microwave straight on xD
Reply
thatgirlinoregon
| 21
You would have to spend an absolutely ludicrous amount of time in front of the microwave before you run the risk of nuking your 'nads. Scientifically speaking, of course.
Reply
afunnyterdcody
| 5
I do it so my girlfriend doesnt get prego
Reply
Wederoney
| 16
Someone wants to have grandchildren ;-).
Reply
VorpikeII
| 17
Aren't the older microwaves dangerous because of radiation? And where do you think southpark got it from?
Reply
Hunthas
| 17
Micro radiation actually does both those things... Standing beside it probably won't do it but sleeping on microwaves that are turned on for a few months probably wi
Reply
amyjadee
| 0
Sounds Legit.
Reply
baconftw
| 9
1- If I had a dollar...
Reply
yearcity
| 0
a lol of the radiation does get out nut much though and don't open door before bell is up
Reply
TraeThaTruth07
| 7
You just said a lot gets out... Not much though. That statement contradicts itself??
By
kikikat88
| 0
My mom still tells me that, but she's not worried about grand kids just kimo bills
Reply
thatgirlinoregon
| 21
I wonder how much 'kimotherapy' costs? Less than chemotherapy, perhaps?
Reply
xgetxbentx
| 13
Apparently she isn't worried about you being educated either...
It's CHEMO not kimo lmfao
It's CHEMO not kimo lmfao
Reply
Arashi_Nightmare
| 8
Oh, please. It could be a personal spelling preference. Some people do have a preference to how they uniquely spell words with certain letterings/pronunciations while knowing that it isn't the conventional spelling... Look at 2's name, for instance :I
Reply
1happymummy
| 14
Chemo.
Reply
tweetbaby14
| 17
52, maybe they just didn't know how to spell chemo, and you didn't need to try and tell a story about "spelling preferences" because you can't justify stupidity?
Just maybe though.
Just maybe though.
Reply
ohSNAPyall
| 26
Calm down, y'all. Kikikat had probably never seen it written.
Maybe she had misunderstood "chemo" for a medical term or a term from another language and spelled it as it sounded because she didn't know it was an abbreviated form of "chemical."
Maybe she had misunderstood "chemo" for a medical term or a term from another language and spelled it as it sounded because she didn't know it was an abbreviated form of "chemical."
Reply
kitkatknicknack
| 12
52, your comment put me to sleep
Reply
herpderpjones
| 0
You know, some people might take serious offense to that comment...
Reply
tanneriscool
| 2
You know, your comment was pointless?
By
alaskababy907
| 11
Hey, I heard that if you stand too close to the microwave you can get cancer from the radiation in those things. You should probably stay away from them...
Reply
imustbeinsane
| 2
Ladies! For that morning after unprotected sex with a douche, just stand by a microwave to destroy all his little good-for-nothing sperm. Cheaper than Plan-B
Reply
ihasbrains
| 10
Microwaves do use radiation, I think, to heat your food. It's just a type that is not really harmful to you. I don't think you would even have a chance to get cancer unless you stood right next to it while it was microwaving for like twenty years straight.
Reply
Jkolbly
| 11
The radiation from microwaves is harmful, but the lead mesh keeps it in the microwave, so no damage can be done if the microwave is intact.
Reply
cosmosis
| 12
Microwaves are bloody dangerous you hear! The radiation will cause your brain to melt out of your ears!!!
But seriously though as the young bloke above me said if the microwave is intact and good working order there is a reduced risk in radiation from the microwave triggering cancer.
But seriously though as the young bloke above me said if the microwave is intact and good working order there is a reduced risk in radiation from the microwave triggering cancer.
Reply
garethsmart
| 0
All radiations are bad! It just depends on the quantity or type!
Reply
weveevee
| 3
Actualy microwaves use microwaves which are on the opposite side of the light spectrum then radiation like gamma rays. It's by the type we use in heat lamps.
Reply
Gringe
| 1
Lol microwaves use microwaves... Thanks 68 good to know.
Anyway microwaves have the perfect combination of the low penetration of alpha particles combined with the low intensity of gamma. However, all radiation is bad for you, but the plastic covering on your microwave is enough to stop most of the waves. Ur better off next to ur microwave than in the sun.
Anyway microwaves have the perfect combination of the low penetration of alpha particles combined with the low intensity of gamma. However, all radiation is bad for you, but the plastic covering on your microwave is enough to stop most of the waves. Ur better off next to ur microwave than in the sun.
Reply
Pretty_Pink_Lady
| 10
32- Yeah that makes sense and all; the lead mesh keeps radiation inside the microwave. Wait a second! What else is in the microwave? Oh yes, your food. The same food that has been exposed to the radiation is now being consumed by you. Maybe we should start rethinking hot pockets.
Reply
kristienna
| 3
Microwave radiation is dangerous, and small amounts do seep out of the microwave. It's impossible to keep it all in. My bf is a physicist and won't even own a microwave for this reason, after studying this stuff and knowing how they work.
Reply
detroitsucks247
| 3
X-rays are radiation, Microwaves are Microwaves not radiation they may not be the best thing for you but they wont cause cancer. microwaves are next on the scale after radiowaves (short radiowaves) and then iltraviolet light after microwaves so they are not deadly.
Reply
IdontWanna69
| 8
Unless you manage to shove your balls into the microwave while it's on, then you should be fine.
Reply
MissPuppettear
| 0
True dat
Reply
Thunderstruck14
| 30
Yes, microwaves to use radiation. Its called electromagnetic radiation and its the same kind of energy that visible light is. Its just a different frequency. The frequency of the radiation a microwave uses is the frequency that resonates with water, which is in all the food you put in it. The electromagnetic radiation in the microwave causes the water molecules to vibrate, therefore heating up your food. Which is why some spots in the microwave don't heat up your food (the nodes in the wave pattern don't move the water particles).
The radiation is only INSIDE the microwave. Things outside the microwave don't heat up as well. You're perfectly safe. My dad believes they'll give you cancer too. But honestly, the electromagnetic radiation you should be afraid of is the kind that comes from the sun. THAT can give you cancer, so wear sunscreen and don't worry about your microwave. It won't hurt you. However, I stand away from it anyway because I dislike the smell it gives off.
The radiation is only INSIDE the microwave. Things outside the microwave don't heat up as well. You're perfectly safe. My dad believes they'll give you cancer too. But honestly, the electromagnetic radiation you should be afraid of is the kind that comes from the sun. THAT can give you cancer, so wear sunscreen and don't worry about your microwave. It won't hurt you. However, I stand away from it anyway because I dislike the smell it gives off.
Reply
TheSacredRatty
| 18
The microwaves are too big to escape from it. You know that perforated screen inside the microwave? That keeps the radiation from getting out.
By
syki
| 22
No, no, she's got it all backwards. It'll kill your *cancer* and give you *sperm.* Moneyshot!
Reply
boofgall
| 16
What?
Reply
hemz_fml
| 13
At least now you know she cares that much for you :)
By
baybeegirrrl95
| 5
Where the hell did she hear that?
Reply
Thelnternet
| 7
Experience.
Reply
NippsSlipps
| 10
South Park, for sure
Reply
yahoowizard
| 16
Or The Office
Reply
wironandine
| 8
It's fact
Reply
wisese
| 0
When microwaves first came out (which op's mom would remember), they did give off a lot of radiation and everyone was told not to stand in front of them while they were cooking. More modern microwaves are safer and give off less radiation. However, your body continues to accumulate radiation when exposed to it, so you should still be cautious.
OP's family could own an older microwave, in which case his mom is absolutely right to be cautious. Up until last year, my family used a microwave from 1984. I guarantee it wasn't particularly safe.
OP's family could own an older microwave, in which case his mom is absolutely right to be cautious. Up until last year, my family used a microwave from 1984. I guarantee it wasn't particularly safe.
Reply
iamyourgod
| 3
93 - no your body can not accumulate microwave radiation, unless your so fat you cause a singularity. It's low energy light, the light bulb in the microwave actually gives off more energetic radiation. All microwaves can do is induce currents in conductors and cause polar molecules to rotate. Your body falls into latter category as you are mostly water, so all a microwave can do is heat you up. It can NOT ionize your atoms, it can't mutate your DNA an it can't accumulate and poison you.
Other radiation such as high energy light (UV, X-ray, gamma) or alpha or beta particles can ionize your atoms and cause mutations such as cancer. When you accumulate radiation it is because you accumulate radioactive elements that emit these radiations when they decay. This is the danger of nuclear waste, not bouncing gamma radiation from the initial reaction lasting for long periods of time. Your microwave emits none of these unless you go and try to microwave uranium 235 or something stupid like that.
Other radiation such as high energy light (UV, X-ray, gamma) or alpha or beta particles can ionize your atoms and cause mutations such as cancer. When you accumulate radiation it is because you accumulate radioactive elements that emit these radiations when they decay. This is the danger of nuclear waste, not bouncing gamma radiation from the initial reaction lasting for long periods of time. Your microwave emits none of these unless you go and try to microwave uranium 235 or something stupid like that.
Reply
wisese
| 0
I never said your body accumulates radiation from the microwave; simply that it does accumulate radiation. My point being that people have to be cautious of how much radiation they are exposed to; every x-ray at the doctor, every pass through the airport body scanners, everything in our lives that we don't think about adds up. For most people, it's still harmless, but it's still important to BE AWARE.
Reply
deathfyre8
| 13
A typical human can stand about 5000 units of radiation before you turn into a glowing puddle.
Reply
possiblyapotato
| 10
when u see 2 smart ppl arguing with scientific terms ....
By
kooochris1995
| 14
That's what happened to me /:
Reply
rciccone
| 0
sperm or cancer?
Reply
xaer0babiix0
| 0
What? You turned into a car? Damn, I'm gonna stick my little brother in front of the microwave next time...
By
LookOnBrightSide
| 12
My father always ends up telling me that, though it could just be his paranoia. OP, I would just listen to your mother. It doesn't hurt to stand a few feet away from the microwave.
Reply
Thunderstruck14
| 30
My dad tells me that too. He also says cell phones will give you cancer. That you'll get brain cancer from holding it up to your ear to talk. I don't believe any of it. I know how microwaves and cellphones work. You can learn too on youtube, there's plenty of educational sites.
By
BeaterOfTheDrums
| 15
Only if you can successfully close your balls in the microwave. But then you can smoke all the pot you want. Anywhere.
Reply
SettoFail
| 9
South park, ?
Reply
datguyuno
| 5
Start bouncing around town on ur balls smoking pot with ur friends LOL
Reply
tracker7
| 5
But we don't want all the KFCs to go away
Reply
j_cat187
| 19
Haha medicinal KFC!!
By
stevenJB
| 25
Oh the parents of our generation are to blame for our stupidity I guess?...?
By
khaya
| 9
Radiation is awesome, stand there long enough and you will be able to fly.
Reply
Comet_Candy
| 23
You will also be able to glow in the dark.