By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Birmingham
Today, my mother-in-law yelled from across the house for me to come quickly. She sounded frantic, so I rushed and asked what was wrong. She said, "Nothing." and that she just wanted to remind me that she hates my guts. She'll be living here with me and my wife for the next two months. FML
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  tjv3  |  10

Just tell her that your house is haunted and that strange accidents have happened there. Then tell her it would be just awful if she had one of those accidents

  Holy_Schnikes  |  23

My Fiancé has learned you can't. We have been together 3 years and and they still hate him and say he will leave me every month. They laughed when I told them we were engaged and said he doesn't want to marry me. They make fun of him every time he does or says anything. A couple months ago my Grandma said she would basically disown me if I had a kid out of wedlock (even though my prostitute cousin just had one and she is excited) so I told her not to worry and that we are waiting until marriage......then she started laughing and asking if he had a penis at all and "What kind of nan would wait?" "He must have something wrong with him, he either doesn't have a penis or he needs a little blue pill if he can't perform" "I don't need to worry about you getting pregnant if he can't get it up." And he is as nice as can be to everyone. My friends love him and their kid loves him too. Sometimes in-laws are just assh*les.

  kaitlynjane  |  28

105: wow, are you kidding me?! That's fucking ridiculous. Just reading that makes me want to slap your grandmother in the face, and I would never normally do that.
That is awful, I'm so sorry you and your fiancé have to deal with that :(

  nurchok  |  15

Well, that is very sad to hear, 105. Your grandma deserves to have your fiancee's dick rubbed in her forehead. I think if a girl is happily married, her side of the family should only be happy for her...

  Holy_Schnikes  |  23

Like I always say I can write FML's all day long about my family. My Grandpa had sat down after a long day at work and she was telling him about it asking him "There has to be something wrong with him!?!?! Isn't there?! He doesn't want to have sex!" and my Grandpa just sighed and said " Leave it alone [Grandma's name] if they want to wait then let them. There isn't anything wrong with it. If there is something mentally or physically wrong with either of them then that is between the two of them." And she just kept going so I left. Sadly my Grandpa and I are the only sane ones in the family.


Just adding on to...#45
Or take a shit on the toliet seat... And refuse it was you and maker her clean it up...just take a shit anywhere, on the carpet, in the shower, on her bed...

  brackaman  |  18

Personally I'd feed her nothing but dog treats for the two months. If anyone asks why just say that if she's gonna act like a bitch she might as well eat like one.

  angeluv_2014  |  22

Exactly. Why don't you just kick her ass out, OP?? It's your house too, and you don't have to put up with being treated that way. That's bullshit- if you're putting her up for two months, then she can cut that shit out.

  starile  |  19

#12, it was actually another chick that originally used "douchecanoe" in the other FML. This guy here just decided to copy that word and use it here. A little too soon, I think.

By  CaptMurdock  |  25

Ah the monster-in-law. Maybe you should return the favor. You could try standing outside her room in the middle of the night and scream her name, then say you just wanted her to know the feeling is mutual.

By  RoseBlack123  |  37

Sounds like my grandma. She even told my mom that she deserves to die and crap. You really should talk to your wife about this and confront her as a couple. That should stop her. If not, charge her rent per day she spends with y'all. That'll show her