Miscellaneous: Today, my mom yelled at me for taking too long at a job interview,...

By kylie b

Today, my mom yelled at me for taking too long at a job interview, and that it was a waste of her time to drive me to it; I just quit my job, moved away from my boyfriend and the coast to help take care of her in Idaho. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35979

You deserved it

4373

Favorite

Miscellaneous

Family values

Insurance is a scam: Tokyo drift

The grudge

By Anonymous - United States - Schenectady

Today, I woke up on the couch and realized I had fallen asleep while doing laundry. Ran to the laundry room, and found all my clothes gone. I really wish I hadn't been doing a load of all my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23896

You deserved it

3154

Favorite

By kookoocatlady

Today, I kept my cats indoors to be safe on Halloween, making sure to keep the food full and litter boxes clean. After dinner, I got dressed up and spent two hours at a party. When I got home, there was a large, rancid butt-loaf waiting on my bed. Unappreciative little fuckers. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9778

You deserved it

1568

Favorite

By mountainmetal983 - 5/3/2020 18:00

The serpentine movement of life

Today, the serpentine belt broke on my truck a mile away from work, 30 minutes before I needed to be there. This caused me to be 45 minutes late. I got written up for being late. The tow truck then took my truck to the wrong mechanic shop. Now I have to pay another tow truck bill to get it to the right shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1508

You deserved it

106

Favorite

By Vassy - Canada - Montreal

Today, I made a positive remark to the owner of my local groceries store for employing a special needs girl. Not only is the girl not mentally handicapped, she's also the owner's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12627

You deserved it

32600

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I met a girl who was just as socially anxious as me. We spent the whole night staring at each other, then quickly looking away when the other person saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18672

You deserved it

2637

Favorite

By erinbarto

Soon.

Today, I listened to my mom having a conversation with my dog, asking him if he ate my hamster. My hamster isn't even dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1283

You deserved it

113

Favorite

By Reaper - South Africa

Today, after weeks of agonising, I told my best friend (who I am madly in love with) that I love her. She said: "me too, you're like a brother and a best girlfriend rolled into one!" FML

I agree, your life sucks

58664

You deserved it

5032

Favorite

By retail hell - United States - Waterbury

Today, a customer berated me and told me to stop whining because I have to work on the weekend. What did I do to deserve this? I said, "Hi, how are you doing today?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

26358

You deserved it

1895

Favorite

By mcdman - United States

Today, one of my employees lit my tie on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29869

You deserved it

5868

Favorite

By Wellgreat

Today, I convinced my roommate, who’s been single for a while, to get back in the dating game. He downloaded Tinder. His first match was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3345

You deserved it

269

Favorite

By RabbitOwner - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing with my pet rabbit when my boyfriend discovered poop on his lap. As he brushed it off, I reminded him that there are a lot worse things in the world than rabbit poop. Almost as if on cue, my rabbit peed on both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14992

You deserved it

21662

Favorite

By Anonymous - Canada - Winnipeg

Communication tool

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40102

You deserved it

6146

Favorite

By ziatenaj - United States

Today, at work, I was trying to repeat an order back to this guy, when his drunk girlfriend started to interrupt me. Whenever I would open my mouth, she would say "Blah blah blah." Literally. Eventually, I gave up. I got his order wrong, and got yelled at by my manager for not repeating his order. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30130

You deserved it

2949

Favorite

By nickyboy - Australia

Today, while having sex on the couch with my single neighbour, a beam in the couch broke. Not even slightly fazed, she said, "It's okay, my husband can fix it." Husband? FML

I agree, your life sucks

38726

You deserved it

8628

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, on my 21st birthday, a relative asked me if I was still engaged to the love of my life. The man I spent several years with, gave my virginity to, moved across the country for, who promised to marry me before my 21st, and who swore he was over his ex for good. No, but thanks for asking. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40408

You deserved it

8076

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me to break up with me. Immediately after we hung up, I started crying hysterically. I thought I dialed my best friend, and as soon as the line picked up, I yelled, "That motherfucker broke up with me!" My now ex-boyfriend replied, "Yeah, I know I did." FML

I agree, your life sucks

49680

You deserved it

20457

Favorite

By Anonymous - Belgium - Gent

Today, I was verbally and physically attacked in a public pool, because I was swimming in what a grandma claimed was her part of the pool. Since I'm a very tolerant person, I calmly tried to talk some reason into the elderly lady. The lifeguard had to come to protect me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23719

You deserved it

1758

Favorite

By aunty_social

Today, I took my 5-year-old nephew camping. I was about to take him to the outhouse for a bathroom break when he flung the door of the camper open and shouted at the top of his lungs to the entire campground, "We are going to poop now!" FML

I agree, your life sucks

2220

You deserved it

296

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States - Erie

Today, I went to the restaurant where my date and I were supposed to meet. After half an hour he still hadn't arrived, so I texted him. He replied with a half-hearted apology and said he couldn't come because his cat had fallen asleep on his lap and he didn't want to wake it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30927

You deserved it

3174

Favorite

By Anonymous - Australia

Today, I'm a youth worker. I drove 7 hours to visit a teenage girl I have been working with, and who recently moved. Due to roadworks, it took me 2 hours longer than expected. When I arrived, she told me to fuck off and closed the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5071

You deserved it

526

Favorite

By lyssanthamum - United States

Today, on the train, I got excited when I suddenly noticed I had a missed call and voicemail from a boy I liked. With a grin on my face, I told my friend. My dad overheard and said, "oh sweetie, he probably had the wrong number." The voicemail was blank. I texted him. The call was an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks

55427

You deserved it

4411

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States - Bloomington

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because of the scratch marks on my back. I didn't have the nerve to tell her I tried to shower with the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks

21763

You deserved it

35675

Favorite

By SwedishBozo - United States

Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML

I agree, your life sucks

32816

You deserved it

325719

Favorite

By fucking Karens! - 11/8/2020 14:02

Karen strikes again

Today, I got lost searching for an apartment in a huge complex. A hysterical woman started screaming that I didn’t belong there, and that she was calling the police. She stood behind my car so I couldn’t leave. I’m a pizza delivery driver, in full uniform and with the company emblem on my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1774

You deserved it

Favorite

By slavelaborsux - United States

Today, it was my first day on the job as a first grade teacher. One student pushed another, so I asked him to apologize. His response? "If you boss me around, I'll tell Daddy you touched me somewhere you shouldn't have." I think I'm now this kid's slave. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40608

You deserved it

3870

Favorite

By kprince - United States - Northridge

Today, I was singing horribly in the shower. Without me knowing, my sister recorded my singing and set it as my ringtone. My phone rang in class and everyone heard it. My new nickname is American Idol. FML

I agree, your life sucks

52364

You deserved it

11202

Favorite

By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend tried to climb up to my third story window in the early hours of the morning. Just before he got to the top, he slipped and fell to the ground. My dad had to drive him to the hospital at 3am. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35810

You deserved it

7685

Favorite

By cmck932012 - United States - Tyrone

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11394

You deserved it

32219

Favorite

By RingofFire - United States - Edenville

Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14175

Phew, glad it wasn't me

1735

Favorite

By anonymous - United States - Federal Way

Today, I was told I needed to start carrying bandaids with me at work because practically every day I hurt myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11098

You deserved it

2291

Favorite

By Sweet Jesus - 18/6/2020 14:02

NCIS: Dumbass Response Team

Today, when my almost-16-year-old asked if the 9-1-1 phone number was named after 9/11, I forgave her because she wasn't even born when it happened, but when my 18-year-old asked if jelly comes from jellyfish, I wondered if I've failed as a parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1308

You deserved it

619

Favorite

By Tired - United States

Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML

I agree, your life sucks

46806

You deserved it

5344

Favorite

By Foxy0706 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I finally told my boyfriend I have a medical condition that makes me grow an unusual amount of hair on my face, so I shave every day. He said he was leaving me because he refuses to be with a "bearded lady". FML

I agree, your life sucks

29026

You deserved it

2390

Favorite

By Me myself & I - United States - Columbus

Today, my parents said they know I don't do drugs or drink because I have no friends to do drugs or drink with. They are right. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20734

You deserved it

2008

Favorite

By growlr - Australia

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43680

You deserved it

5783

Favorite

By ziggers10 - United States

Today, I was proposed to, under the condition that I "get thin" first. FML

I agree, your life sucks

52936

You deserved it

9874

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States - Sainte Genevieve

Today, I asked if my friend wanted to come meet my dog and give him a treat. We were walking to my back yard, her holding 3 hot dogs, when she said, "I think your dog is dead!" I said, "No, he's just old and sleeps all the time and won't wake up until you pet him because he's deaf." He was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9184

You deserved it

625

Favorite

By haileelouxxx - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45516

You deserved it

5409

Favorite

By Ammile

Today I had a customer come into my office smelling like feces, urine and body odor. I tried not to get sick to my stomach but failed miserably. I threw up in my trash can in front of him. It now smells like feces, urine, body odor and vomit in here. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2727

You deserved it

171

Favorite

By Ashley - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31439

You deserved it

25174

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By OCDC | 9

#2562476 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:01

How dare you think of others first, OP!

By iLazy | 0

#2562470 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:00

TELL HER TO GET A JOB!

COMMENTS

By iLazy | 0

#2562470 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:00

TELL HER TO GET A JOB!

Trupe | 3

#2563006 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 18:01

Cant be a nice person nowadays...

jane79 | 0

#2563226 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 19:07

tell her if she's going to act like that your out of there. I hate to say it but your mom sounds pretty ungrateful for what you have done for her and if she starting out acting like this then she will probally only get worse and in that cas I would go back to the coast and have someone else take care of her

Rainbow2Cloud | 12

#6256481 - Wednesday 8 April 2015 16:53

OP's mom is so ungrateful.

By OCDC | 9

#2562476 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:01

How dare you think of others first, OP!

iluvhobos | 5

#2563669 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 21:09

at least now OP can have all the potatoes she wants! (:

bhangu023 | 0

#2564840 - Thursday 26 May 2011 1:03

time to move back

By iAmScrubs | 19

#2562477 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:01

Your mom is a first class Principal Skinner's mom.

By spez8 | 0

#2562486 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:02

man! hang in there.

By claiiire_fml | 17

#2562514 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:06

Your mom is a bitch OP.

By BruisedGiraffe | 15

#2562520 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:07

I fuckin hate it when people act like this. you do so much for them and they just act like ungrateful little pricks

zbennett | 0

#2562845 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 17:19

Story of my life man, I feel like I help so many people and get little in return. I'm not complaining either. I know most of the time I shouldn't help, but I just feel guilty if I don't.

BruisedGiraffe | 15

#2563439 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 19:57

I feel the exact same way

By thebestof1984 | 0

#2562524 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:08

That's your que to pack up again and move back home far from Idaho!!!

KelStr | 0

#2563649 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 21:06

I love Idaho. Where else can you find almost every recreational sport in such a unique area? Idaho literally has everything other than the Ocean and a Rain Forest.

Person1233 | 12

#2564280 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 23:13

I'm sure he wasn't dissing Idaho, simply the bitch who lives there.

Noelletakumi | 36

#6547970 - Monday 29 February 2016 8:30

I have lived in Idaho for 13 years...like OP I am originally from the coast and would do anything to go back. Honestly a lot more opportunity by the ocean.

By HeavyMetalViking | 0

#2562528 - Wednesday 25 May 2011 16:08

You really deserved it for taking too long at the job interview. You're not supposed to give every single interviewer a blow job, you're only required to give a simple strip show. Blow jobs come after you get the job.