By eggman 583 - 13/09/2016 21:12 - United States - Massapequa

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I was, "trying to change her." A week ago I asked her to stop talking to the 6 guys that have all previously asked her for nudes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 557
You deserved it 1 185

Same thing different taste

Top comments

redcode5 17

Dumb bitch should have been dropped earlier, you are much better off without her OP.

It's the fact that they asked her for nudes. Not that she talks to some guys...


sounds like she was looking for a reason to end the relationship.

this could be an unpopular opinion but I find it weird when couples tell each other not to talk to others like if you trust your partner then why limit their friends?

It's the fact that they asked her for nudes. Not that she talks to some guys...

There's a huge difference between not wanting your SO to have friends and not wanting them talking to people who obviously want to have sex with them.

While I get that it makes OP uncomfortable, I don't think anyone ever has the right to prevent their SO from talking to someone. I mean, sure, OP can explain why it weirds him out, and ask why she would even want to keep talking to those guys, but it's up to the girlfriend to decide what she does with that. If OP literally told her to stop talking to them, I understand that she wanted to break up.

#26 I take it you'd be fine with your partner sending nudes to almost ten people then? Because hey, you don't have the right to tell them not to, right?

As a matter of fact, yes, I would be fine with that, although I would probably advise him to take care with sending nudes as you never know where they might end up. But that's my personal opinion, and I get that everyone has a different comfort level with regards to this type of thing. That's why it's important to discuss boundaries when starting a relationship. If OP is uncomfortable with his partner talking to people who are interested in her in a sexual way, that is definitely something to discuss with her. However, it sounds like OP simply told her she needs to stop talking to them, which seems controlling and unhealthy to me. There is a big difference between "you do this thing that I'm uncomfortable with, can we talk about that and see if we can find a solution that works for us both?" and "you do this thing that I'm uncomfortable with, and I've decided on my own that you need to stop doing it".

That would be fine if the relationship was open, but it's clearly not.

#37 is missing the point. OP didn't TELL her to stop. He said he ASKED her. There is a very big difference between those two things.

I agree with 1, she isn't really worth it if she can't handle something reasonable like that. Set some standards and stick to them.

Wth?!! Sorry OP. It ought to be standard girlfriend protocol to do that without being asked to. Sounds like you are better off without her and her many admirers.

species4872 19

Maybe I should send the nudes back.

redcode5 17

Dumb bitch should have been dropped earlier, you are much better off without her OP.

I read "trying to change her" and was hoping for the rare diaper fetish FML. I'm not alone, right? Guys? Pfft, story of my life. :(

I got stuck on that exact phrase for a similar reason.

Were you trying to change her into a girl that honors those requests?

so you essentially tried to make her cut six people out of her life, when she was likely handling the situation herself, and that somehow DOESN'T come off as controlling to you...? glad she got out of this one. fyi even if she was handing nudes out like candy you don't own your girlfriend's body or get to decide who she talks to. grow up dude.

The thing with dating is, unless you're in an open relationship, you're not supposed to flirt with other people or encourage other people flirting with you. That's not controlling or thinking one's body belongs to you. That's just the fact sending nudes is considered flirting and believe it or not, keeping in touch with 6 people who ask for those and surely flirt with her constantly would make a lot of people feel like they're not good enough, not important or not making their partner happy since they still feel the need to flirt with other people.

Relationships have their own boundaries. Many have the boundary of this isn't acceptable. If a partner speaks up about feeling uncomfortable over something, you need to talk it over and see if you can find a compromise or not. Apparently they couldn't in this. Though it'd be interesting to know how she'd react to the reverse situation of op being asked by other girls for nudes..

AznLuvsMusic 26

So if your significant other decided to send their nudes to other people (who may or may not have asked for them), you'd be perfectly okay with it?

I wouldn't say you're "not supposed to flirt" while in a monogamous relationship. People's comfort levels with regards to flirting vary wildly, and I know of quite a few couples where both partners fully agree not so sleep with other people, but where some flirting is considered very normal and innocent. Clearly OP and his ex have different opinions about this, but that doesn't mean OP's way of seeing it is necessarily the only right way, and that his ex is a horrible and disrespectful person like a lot of people here seem to think.

Justy101 23

Sending nudes to other men when in a relationship of any kind without having first discussed it with your partner is emotional cheating. I know several couples that are either polygamous or in open relationships and the number one rule is to be open and honest about everything. The second rule they have is that if one of them really doesn't like a person the other wants to date, then the other person will not date them. If you are in a relationship with someone, you probably give a shit about them. You simply don't pull shit like this on people you care about.

The FML doesn't state that she sent nudes to anyone, just that she's been talking to guys who've asked for nudes. Not the same thing.