Health: Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and...

By AnastasiyaNicholas - 18/02/2012 14:20 - United States

Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and yelled at me for ditching school. It took half an hour to explain that it's 5:00, and I've already been to school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 727

You deserved it 2 039

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 20:00

Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 444

You deserved it 213

By Anonymous - 21/05/2014 16:05 - United States - New York

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 851

You deserved it 4 365

By ipayyourbillsgorramit - 24/08/2012 23:29 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 437

You deserved it 1 907

By Anonymous - 04/03/2014 04:12 - United States - Woodland

Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 153

You deserved it 3 206

By BoomHeadshot - 02/05/2012 02:27 - Australia

Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 628

You deserved it 32 840

Mommy dearest

By Ohkourt - 20/04/2020 05:00

Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 652

You deserved it 110

Blackout drunk

By MagnusDeus - 07/06/2015 15:46 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I left a concert with my drunk mother who had spilled beer all over my shirt. I drove her home and she slept it off. Later, my mom "found" my shirt in the laundry and grounded me for drinking behind her back. She won't believe me that it was her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 848

You deserved it 1 766

It's just liquid fun

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 05:08 - United Kingdom

Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 026

You deserved it 3 021

By driverboy - 31/12/2014 08:08 - United States

Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 902

You deserved it 4 872

By Anonymous - 06/01/2011 16:46 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a show with my drama group. My mom isn't a good drunk, she decided to scream along to every song and pass out halfway through. She was in the front row. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 361

You deserved it 2 698

tellithowitis 13

Saturday 18 February 2012 19:48

Don't even try to explain... No use.

McMan 23

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:20

Tell her school was canceled for national alcohol abuse awareness day and that they were coming to get her. May provide some entertainment.

Comments

McMan 23

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:20

Tell her school was canceled for national alcohol abuse awareness day and that they were coming to get her. May provide some entertainment.

pulore 3

Sunday 19 February 2012 9:10

That was awesome!!! Lol

emeraldisle 30

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:23

Sounds like you're used to this kind of thing. Sorry OP. That sucks.

iloveweed69 7

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:25

Take her beer away :/

AnagenisisZagus 13

Sunday 19 February 2012 7:09

....No.

Alli201103 3

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:27

You might as well give up on the conversation...

muckler 1

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:43

Awww. That really sucks. Sorry.

liftedyoda 5

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:03

You can never win against parents dont even waste your time

derkster 6

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:07

Lmao :):):)

The_Hitdude 12

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:35

That's actually not funny....at all.

Michael_92 20

Sunday 19 February 2012 1:57

So this is funny how? Would you laugh if you were the OP?

pulore 3

Sunday 19 February 2012 9:13

You try growing up with a parent whose an alcoholic. It's certainly not a laighing matter. Try to have a little compassion!

pulore 3

Sunday 19 February 2012 9:15

Sorry for my shitty grammer. I'm severely sleep deprived. I meant laughing.

crazyblackchick 0

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:29

Maybe she took a look at your grades and decided that you need night school, too. And then got drunk off her ass.

notsorandomguy 18

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:30

"I'm actually your granddaughter. You've been in a coma for 42 years."

DocBastard 38

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:34

Good for you that you're still going to school despite having a useless sack of booze-sodden garbage for a mother. It would be very easy for you to fall into a similar pit, but it seems like you're rising above it. Kudos to you, OP.

Niicky_fml 20

Saturday 18 February 2012 23:25

No one probably cares, but my mom has a HORRIBLE drinking problem and I stay in school so I won't end up like her.

drawmesunshine 17

Saturday 18 February 2012 23:43

Good for you, Niicky. As Snoopy says, "School is cool." (:

demonmonkey 13

Sunday 19 February 2012 5:57

Youre right. I don't care.

THE_A_TEEN 27

Sunday 19 February 2012 18:25

You don't care, but then you spend precious time for you to write that "you don't care". So either you care but pretended to not care, or you're really a heartless asshole. Either way, go **** yourself, demonmonkey...