ha

Spider bite...... Spider bite... Oooooh itchy spider bite!

It would be funny if OP walked in on his parents and his dad says "ummm your mum also had an itch"

LOL, classic!

Good contribution. And what makes this a classic unless this is a regular occurrence for you.

Good contribution. And what makes this a classic unless this is a regular occurrence for you.

The numbers started at 2. Weird.

29 - That means number 1 got moderated.

I've noticed everyone seems to be assuming it was a guy. The "explanation" would've made more sense - and the entire situation been way more awkward (and interesting) - if OP was female O_o

31- I was actually thinking the same thing.

Yep and you had to fap it.

Uh, I mean scratch it.

29- you must be new . (picture)

Fap fap fap fap fap...

Same thing happened to me! Hahaha

Heh. Heh heh heh. Fap.

Tis all.

Think that's bad I was masturbating and playing pokemon (not at the same time and no I wasn't jerking off to Pokemon) and my dad walked in luckily he didnt see ._.

Wat the fuck dude really ?

"I was justing cleaning it and it went off"

um...I was just massaging it because some idiot kicked it......wanna help??? ;P?

A really really bad itch.... So I casually decided to scratch it.... With lotion and porn....

He is pretending he didn't see.

Dad: Must have been one hell of an itch
Offspring: Yes, it kinda was... O.o
Dad: Umm why are there stains on your shorts, & wtf is that smell??

..

Why would there be a smell???

Its that new semen smell!

It may not be the smell of semen it doesn't state whether OP is a male or female

Are you a virgin, 32?

32 - sex smells.

32 is indeed a virgin

Were you born in the last 5 years?

Ur not funny

Lmfao. This made my day.

Seems legit.

Ferociously itching...

Seems legit

There's a skeeter on my Peter whack it off!

I like to itch my balls while looking at naked (wo)men. Is there a problem, father?

My brother once walked in on me and the first thing I yelled out was "Fuck You" hahaha I don't even know why I said it lol just a reaction.

U should have told him u were checking for ticks

Made me LOL.

Isn't it the worst when your parents walk in.

Nah, it could be worse. Like when your grandparents walk in.

I wouldn't mind if you walked in ;)

Creeper alert!!!

5 - looks like you're used to that now, considering you must still be living at home.

It could be worse, like your parents and grandparents walking in! O.o

I'll admit it, I deserved the backlash even through I was only kidding around lol

Better than killing grandma with your money shot.

45- Nice profile pic.

American Pie ;)

#5's response could also be a legitimate reference to the original American Pie.

"It's like warm apple pie."
*challenge accepted**fucks pie*
(Dad walks in)
Challenge failed. (miserably)

He knows what you're doing and has done it himself...a lot!!!

Like smoking pot... The seventies!!!

yeah mausterbating was big in the seventies...

83-So was masturbating...

Only in new jersey...

Hay!! Don't diss Jersey!!! (BTW do not refer to JerseyShore that show is a ton of stereotypes!)

Is that why you spelled hey a hay and used the word diss?

lock the door maybe...

Ya because all doors have locks on them...
-__-

Find ones that do.

Or do it in the shower.

Just some hardcore scratching for an annoying itch!

Dad: Oh yea I have the same exact itch. Look!

Thats weird, i seem to have the same itch