By axewoman - 17/10/2014 08:14

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 038
You deserved it 3 696

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Top comments

And then you can treat his wood for him ;)

Or she can cut their dicks off or whatever it's her choice I guess

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And then you can treat his wood for him ;)

You realize lumberjacks chop trees right? "Treating" his wood is possibly the last thing any sane male wants.

Or she can cut their dicks off or whatever it's her choice I guess

euphoricness 28

Don't forget the mayonnaise

5 - no wayyyyyy

kyu_Q 19

I'm with #1 on this. lumberjacks know how to handle good wood.

Knowing how to handle good wood is one thing #40 but its more important if she knows how to handle wood good!

incoherentrmblr 21

How much wood can a Wood Chuck chuck if a Wood Chuck could Chuck Norris?...

If you do indeed treat his wood right with any luck he will axe you to marry him! I'll show myself out.

diving_fml 30

at least he knows you'll find someone

How much could a wood chuck wood if a wood chuck could chuck wood

Hope she doesn't chop your wood down.

She's a lumberjack and she's okay, she sleeps all night and she works all day.

She chops down trees, she wears high heels.

Suspenders and a bra!

tony1891 22

so i married an axe murderer?

"I put on women's clothing / And hang around in bars."

Who needs outdated gender roles anyway

Well at least he doesn't assume that you're a lesbian

Wears a red flannel wedding gown

Because you are one awesome-in-shape-strong-stereotype-shattering-glass-ceiling-busting girl, right? :)

I sang that in Phineas and Ferbs' "truck-driving-girl" tune