By Ginna - 29/10/2010 18:29 - Canada

Today, my dad planted and "discovered" a pack of cigarettes in my backpack to distract my mom from his gambling problem. FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 141
You deserved it 2 615

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Plant a dildo in his drawer. Have your Mom go get something from his drawer.... Then enjoy the show :)

You can expect a free box of condoms any day now.

Comments

hahah agreed :P

It's a full blown conspiracy!!

Haha I agree with 1, 33, 41, & 48 :D

Guys omg don't you get it? OP is trying to make himself feel better over his addiction by lying.

Idiots. That's why you can "thumb up" his comment

hahahahah your dad sounds hilarious

Plant a dildo in his drawer. Have your Mom go get something from his drawer.... Then enjoy the show :)

haha clever dad. you should blackmail him

YDI for smoking.

Agreed. Smoking is a disgusting habit. You should feel ashamed OP.

Are you cunts even reading the FML? It's his dad that's the disgusting smoker. You know what, fuck this shit, you people must be legally retarded or something, fuck off god dammit.

#9, calm down... Both Ill and I are being sarcastic....

No I wasn't.

And not to mention, OP said he has a GAMBLING problem, not a smoking problem ("he" being the father, in case you can't read). Please, next time if you're going to blow up at a bunch of sarcastic strangers, re-read the FML yourself pal. Good day to you, SIR.

Yeah? Yeah? You want to fucking throw down, dawg? I'll throw down. I'll throw it the fuck down. Outside Perdix' kiddy-snatcher-mobile in 5 minutes. 5 minutes, don't forget it. We'll see who has the last sardonic laugh, you ridiculous little man.

True, it didn't mention the father having a smoking problem, or that he even smokes in the first place, but some people do not consider having a few cigarettes a day to be a smoking problem. The father could very well be a smoker and the OP just didn't mention it. If I were to plot against someone, I would be more likely to use something I had, rather than buy something to frame them.

Werd dat shit, mah African-American sistah. That's exactly what I was trying to say before what's his name challenged me to a throw-down. I was being polite and respectful too. Kids these days don't know the value of respecting their superiors, honestly. Fucking disgrace.

Actually the dad smokes but not cigarettes. I modded it and it originally said that the dad planted his medical marijuana not cigarettes. So it did belong to the dad.

WAT NO WAI OMGOMGOMGOMFG NOFUCKINWAI But yeah, they have an anti-drugs policy or something, or so I hear from a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-hooker's-uncle who submitted a drugs FML before. The mods replaced the cocaine with cigarettes. I shit you the fuck not.

Okay, now, take a few deep breaths, calm down, and go sit in the corner for 5-ish years or until you're sane again. Whichever's later.

I'm wondering how many people actually thought I was being serious.

Just enough for you to backtrack and try to play it off as sarcasm, eh mate eh, you siiiiiiiiick little fuck. Yeah, don't deny it, it's transparently obvious and you're just embarrassing yourself now, stop it, I mean it, just stop it before your mum finishes riding her fuckstick and reads your comment and then feels PROPERLY ashamed. Besides, you claimed above that you WEREN'T being sarcastic. WHICH ONE IS IT, MCDIPSHIT?! God, children today, I don't know what's wrong with them. Christ, I can't help you if you won't admit you're a fucklung.

Actually, both of my first two comments were sarcastic. Do you want a hug?

YES I DO. But make it both quick and inconspicuous. I have a reputation as a heartless loser to keep up here. One love, baby.

Don't worry, I won't tell anyone.

Okay, which idiot moderated my comment? There was nothing bad about it. It was a harmless joke that broke no rules. Heck, it was the least deserving of a moderation in this thread. -_-

lol to Ill and wwe on the first two posts ! Of course it was sarcastic :P I love sarcasm!! (but nothing sarcastic in this post haha)

Misdirection ftw!

Ok... Well I was being sarcastic anyway... What are ya gonna do? Sue me? (cue the "only in America" comments)

Dey Turk Er Jubs!

14 ur so stupid 4 getting so upset ovr an FML comment. maybe u should get a life

"Get a life." Really? This from someone who calls himself "callofdutyking?" Are you seriously serious? ALL HAIL THE COD KING. Goddamn video game fanboys. Jesus.

There's no problem with his username at all, you on the other hand assume that he's a no lifer and plays cod all day... He can be a huge fan of the game? Nothing wrong with that. You "seriously" need to "seriously" get off his nuts for that. Oh, and fuck off by the way, what guy isn't into video games? I've yet to meet one that hasn't touched one at all in there life. Learn to not judge people chick... People like you should be thrown aside from everyone else for being shitty to someone you don't even know. Bitch.

"People like you should be thrown aside from everyone else for being shitty to someone you don't even know. Bitch." God, I just live for things like this. You are so funny, being all hypocrit and stuff!

lol battlefield bad company 2 is bettul trolllllllll

ALL HAIL DOCBASTARD

ahaha, hopefully your mom believes you... ;) but I'd suggest get him back.. :)

haha. why didn't you just say ya mom i so smoke thats why dad planted them in my bag so you wouldn't realize that he has a gambling problem. then you can tell her you told her that you were not stealing money from them, that it was really all dad.

Holy shit, I'm gonna need backup for this one. Doc? Anna? Spas? Anyone?

*loads explaination gun* Ok, let's do this.

*sigh* Goddammit, now I need to switch into "Idiot Translation" mode. This person is suggesting that OC admit to smoking, while creating subterfuge at the same time by stabbing his father in the back - first by divulging his gambling problem, and second by suggesting that father steals money from mother to support said vice. That took a lot out of me. Whew. I need a nap, a shower, and a stout. Not necessarily in that order.

LEEEEEEEEROOOOOOOOY JEEEEEEEENKINS!

*Sighs and unloads explanation gun.* Thank you very much, Doc.