Today, my boyfriend left me for my step-sister. He's been cheating on me with her for the past 6 months, and got her pregnant. I also found out that my stomach pains are due to the fact that I'm also pregnant. My family could officially qualify for Jerry Springer. FML
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By
tdub10
| 2
This is truely an fml. Sorry, I feel bad for you Op.
By
12596
| 0
Jerry is the answer to all your problems
COMMENTS
By
drakem
| 7
that sucks
Reply
WishResign
| 0
I've never been pro-choice, but you might not want a baby by this man. especially since you'll be reminded of him by your bitch stepsister & her own kid. don't tell him about it or do but you might not want to be tied to a douche forever.... hehe tied to a douche. That's a funny image I just got there
Reply
Skroal_stomper
| 5
I agree.
Reply
WishResign
| 0
If you're looking for an ethical debate with anyone I'm not interested. I was talking outta my ass. that should have been clear on the last line. what does anyone care what I think? I can't believe people are starting to get up in arms about a passing comment I made. I also consider myself 'conditionally pro-life'... make of that what you will, idc. not everything must be black or white, up or down, republican or democrat, etc. I have a right to be in the middle all I want. if it bothers people that's okay. we all don't have to agree on things. we're all different. you see... that's what so great about this world. we are all made up of different colors & backgrounds but we can all communicate through the power of love. my hope is to one day hold hands with every type of person one day. thin, fat as fuck, tall, short, straight, queer, & everything in between. and well buddy, maybe you & I can hold hands in harmony one day, as well. and if you don't want to, why that's okay with me, too :)
Reply
starile
| 19
My gawd, that last one was a loooong thing to speak out of your ass. I was about to tl;dr, but I just couldn't stop gawking at this piece of work.
Reply
WishResign
| 0
89, you mean my ass? feel free to 'gawk', everyone does. It truly is an amazing piece of work.
In fact, I'm buttering my ass right this moment.
In fact, I'm buttering my ass right this moment.
Reply
pooponyuou
| 0
maybe thts why they say save it for marriage?
Reply
TheIrishJaneDoe
| 8
80: Oh, shove your condescending beauty pageant crap. Your comment didn't make sense and pen called you on it. Suck it up and admit it; your sarcasm, if that's what it was, just makes you look like an ass.
Reply
WishResign
| 0
wasn't sarcasm, little red... it was honesty in the 1st part mixed with humor in the 2nd part. I was attempting to lighten the mood. whatever he called me on is irrelevant b/c I'll always say what I want. I chose to take the high road & make a joke. at first, at least he was nice about his opposition, unlike you. don't believe me? it's of no consequence to me. I'm also allowed to have a 'gray area opinion', not my fault that you don't understand it & it's nothing to argue over if you don't. no need for you both to get up in arms over me trying to make light of the situation.
now if you'll excuse me, I hear my sister's stomach growling under the floorboards. I need to get the key from Mother to feed it.
now if you'll excuse me, I hear my sister's stomach growling under the floorboards. I need to get the key from Mother to feed it.
Reply
goldiefox
| 0
Any reason no matter what it is to get an abortion is murder. If we're all about saving the endanger animals then why is it not bad to kill babies? It's the same thing! And waiting until marriage is the best birth control ever!
Reply
Chris_Rahl
| 2
@80- Can you "Imagine" a World like that?
Reply
WishResign
| 0
the redhead was talking about my #80 comment... it's not hard to understand. am I addressing retards here? this is getting sad. the first part of my #80 comment was honesty & the second part of my #80 comment was humor. we were done talking about my #40 comment, which I still hold that I was talking just for the fuck of it. It's pretty sad to see that I was trying to be nice in my #80 comment by trying to lighten the mood with a joke (regardless of whether you thought it funny or not), at least you could have seen, as I've explained, that I wasn't coming from a bad place. I'm not an idiot just because YOU don't understand what I'm saying. I thought you were being lighthearted in the beginning as well, but I see you were just trying to be mean I guess. I've made jokes in all my posts to show that I was still willing to let this misunderstanding go without any hard feelings & in turn I get called an idiot...?
Reply
WishResign
| 0
#158 - no, I can't hahaha it'd be a little too high school musical for me ;)
By
traze
| 7
Holy shit. Please go Jerry.
Reply
traze
| 7
in*
Reply
traze
| 7
WTF! ON* bitch ON FUCKING KEYBOARD.
Reply
KaySL
| 24
Hey, Traze man, lrn2spell lulz :D
Reply
traze
| 7
It's not that at all, my fingers are to big.
Reply
KaySL
| 24
Your fingers are "TO" big? Are you fucking shitting me?
Reply
traze
| 7
Again WTF. I'm not shitting you. Dammit, I need a new IPhone.
Reply
KaySL
| 24
You need a new Broca's area, that's what you need u duma$$ sumbich loloooollolllollolz
That and better taste in electricals.
That and better taste in electricals.
Reply
RedPillSucks
| 31
oohh , No she di-int. school psychology, FTW.
Reply
mfmylifesrsly
| 29
you know Kay, you maybe shouldn't make fun of everyones spelling, I hate when people misspell words, too, but I made fun of my friends spellings cause he always misspelled words and it turns out he was severely dyslexic. just a thought.
Reply
KaySL
| 24
You made fun of a dyslexic kid? You sick motherfucker. That said, there's a difference between frankly unforgivable actions like your mockery of the poor kid, and mocking someone who's only spelling poorly because he's using a likely wank-encrusted Apple piece of crap. :D
Reply
theFMLiest1ofThe
| 0
first of all this guy blamed his iPhone, not a disorder.
second, Kay gets the win anyway for being the first person on FML that I've ever seen make a Broca's aphasia dis. Way to bring out the big guns ;)
second, Kay gets the win anyway for being the first person on FML that I've ever seen make a Broca's aphasia dis. Way to bring out the big guns ;)
Reply
WallyTheWombat
| 0
Funny shit KaySL. Unfortunately I also know the horrors of typing on the iPhone keyboard :( The FML app doesn't have a landscape mode for reasons I can't fathom. Portrait layout isn't spaced out enough for my fat fingers.
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Wally, that argument doesn't hold water. I'm on an iPhone too, and I mever nake mistakes.
Reply
BoomerFTW
| 0
^LMAO
Reply
thejacl
| 0
yah me nother
Reply
Iskaria
| 0
The term 'wank-encrusted' will be forever engraved on my mind lol...
By
12596
| 0
Jerry is the answer to all your problems
Reply
mfmylifesrsly
| 29
false. Maury is.
you ARE the father!!
you ARE the father!!
Reply
hawk515
| 0
JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!
Reply
hawk515
| 0
JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!
Reply
hmna
| 0
JER-RY! JER-RY! JER-RY!
By
tdub10
| 2
This is truely an fml. Sorry, I feel bad for you Op.
By
luvzit
| 0
ohhh god what a circus!!!! what happened to safe sex???
Reply
DjeePee
| 24
Indeed. don't you tell me that it's an accident if he got two girls pregnant. Use contraception, and no, a condom isn't safe. Just 75% whereas the pill is 99%.
Reply
mfmylifesrsly
| 29
you can still get pregnant from being safe. although it is likely they both didn't since he got two girls pregnant, but you never know.
also, your boobs are lopsided.
also, your boobs are lopsided.
Reply
SneakBS
| 0
lol!!! the things pol notice heh
Reply
athenaxdivine
| 0
lmao 43! I'd hide that shit if I was her
Reply
tmmundy
| 17
lmao....at ur last comment...I was thinking the same thing!!!!
Reply
iSitt
| 0
even if something is 99%,
if a if it's used a million times,
that's still 10,000 pregnancies.
if a if it's used a million times,
that's still 10,000 pregnancies.
Reply
SneakBS
| 0
the chances of the same guy getting 2 girls preg within what I assume must be weeks of each other must be minute! add a condom a the pill n it's mad to think of the odds but hey crazier things have happened I guess...
Reply
mfmylifesrsly
| 29
aww my comment got deleted :( lol
Reply
SneakBS
| 0
argh dnt tell me that now I wanna know!! :'(
Reply
TheDrifter
| 23
Just tell him to aim high next time op, it works wonders as birth control.
Reply
RileyL29
| 0
bahaha exactly what I was thinking!!
Reply
idratherbeincali
| 0
EWW! its true 43. I just laughed to tears. Thanks for making my day guys.
Oh, And kudos to 51
But seriously, c'mon, it's not her fault she can't afford all her plastic surgery at once.
Oh, And kudos to 51
But seriously, c'mon, it's not her fault she can't afford all her plastic surgery at once.
Reply
zkchild
| 0
At least he's keeping it in the family.
Reply
haiden108
| 0
haha #43 .. win . lmao
By
AAShah
| 0
Oh dayam.
By
Blazingcrono
| 6
You can't always be safe with safe sex. There's always a risk involved.
Can a mod rephrase this? This FML sounds horrible grammar-wise.
Can a mod rephrase this? This FML sounds horrible grammar-wise.
By
SamSayzRAWRZ
| 0
Bwahaha that's so silly! YLS though for you and your step sis both getting pregnant but YDI for not using protection.
Reply
jaybabyx3
| 0
How do you know she didn't use it?
FYL for not thinking before you speak.
FYL for not thinking before you speak.
Reply
SamSayzRAWRZ
| 0
I mean using ENOUGH protection. Think before you speak.
By
baylebear
| 0
that's horrible :(
By
DrDiamond
| 0
wow! at least your baby will have a brother/cousin to grow up with.
Reply
PrincessSxy32
| 0
in order for it to be a brother she would need to have another kid D.A.!
Reply
mfmylifesrsly
| 29
84 it will be their brother, their half brother.
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Gregor Mendel is crying right now, PrincessSxy32.