FML : Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said "It's...

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Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By rachiej8 / Sunday 10 June 2012 04:13 / United States - Fairlee

Intimacy

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Top comments

By Pinkfl0yd | 9

#4547763 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:29

Doesn't matter; had snacks!

By ThatGuyRory | 9

#4547739 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:25

Ice Cream makes everything better.

Comments

By ThatGuyRory | 9

#4547739 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:25

Ice Cream makes everything better.

Dramori | 29

#4547749 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:27

What flavour of ice cream?

mango260 | 9

#4547820 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:39

It does!

zachherbert | 10

#4547839 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:45

5- Rocky road..

p3mguin | 7

#4548146 - Sunday 10 June 2012 14:53

Mint chocolate chip. YAY BUDDY!

ucoolgirl31 | 20

#4548231 - Sunday 10 June 2012 15:23

5 - rainbow.

thiscrazything | 1

#4549019 - Sunday 10 June 2012 18:44

Did you get hard or soft ice-cream?

Spicemelon | 5

#4549777 - Sunday 10 June 2012 21:49

Grown ups get wasted on ice cream

aaahhhfire21 | 0

#4550811 - Monday 11 June 2012 3:18

Hmm next time just blow him guaranteed concrete

DaBugg | 7

#4553100 - Monday 11 June 2012 18:41

shit flavor

ssbtoday | 3

#4557373 - Tuesday 12 June 2012 13:24

I guess they both got something soft and creamy that evening.

Afish955 | 3

#5086879 - Saturday 27 October 2012 8:48

I wanna get chocolate wasted!

By flamegrilled123 | 3

#4547743 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:25

Ice cream > sex

bengermin | 5

#4547806 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:37

They're from Vermont, the land of Ben and Jerry's! ...I'd bet all sorts of emotions are worked out over ice cream there.

awagh666 | 14

#4548019 - Sunday 10 June 2012 13:56

The story goes that ben and jerry tried to get it on, but ended up making ice cream instead. So yeah, ice cream > sex

Dylman | 6

#4548303 - Sunday 10 June 2012 15:53

New version of that song, "birthday sex"

ICastillo | 24

#4548395 - Sunday 10 June 2012 16:26

I bet OP had an orgasm in her mouth after eating that ice cream. So it a win win

Ray_of_midnight | 22

#4548905 - Sunday 10 June 2012 18:19

"Doesn't matter, had ice cream"

By alexm501 | 0

#4547745 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:27

You're a nice girl....

By ambowew | 7

#4547751 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:28

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

anoellem | 1

#4547862 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:49

Wtf?

zachherbert | 10

#4547959 - Sunday 10 June 2012 13:27

I've reread this six or seven times, and it makes less and less sense...

alstbv12 | 13

#4547997 - Sunday 10 June 2012 13:47

It essentially means that ops boyfriend can't get hard for women and that maybe he should try his luck with men...dont worry. I speak the language of the dumb.

zachherbert | 10

#4548009 - Sunday 10 June 2012 13:51

Ahh, a translator.. FML needs more of you.

Il_Maestro | 6

#4548058 - Sunday 10 June 2012 14:18

I think it is also suggesting that that different guy be her own brother. In which case I am inclined to smash my head against hard objects even more.

malters | 9

#4548167 - Sunday 10 June 2012 14:59

36- or just less stupid people

furfantasies | 0

#4548246 - Sunday 10 June 2012 15:27

What...

folfg0 | 12

#4548816 - Sunday 10 June 2012 17:56

Guys. People like #6 breed, and vote. We are fucked...........

#6. I have a question. Why.... Are you?

Shadomasta | 5

#4549638 - Sunday 10 June 2012 21:08

6- Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

By angelk12 | 6

#4547758 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:28

Bitch.

By Pinkfl0yd | 9

#4547763 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:29

Doesn't matter; had snacks!

challan | 19

#4548046 - Sunday 10 June 2012 14:13

I spit out my juice laughing.

Feared | 9

#4548275 - Sunday 10 June 2012 15:37

But I'm lactose intolerant.

Doesnt matter ; had snacks!

I just had snaaaaacks!

And it tasted so great!

Felt so gooooood, yeah...

...

reddudeover | 2

#4548464 - Sunday 10 June 2012 16:49

64 - Trying a leetle too hard, you almost come across as rabid.

Rocky007 | 15

#4549859 - Sunday 10 June 2012 22:10

Funniest comment I've seen on FML. Nicely played!

bluekid7 | 5

#4551406 - Monday 11 June 2012 7:50

Talk about soft-serve

RogueWarrior869 | 23

#4552371 - Monday 11 June 2012 15:55

This is why I wish we could favorite comments. XD
You win some internet.

By miserypoison | 13

#4547773 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:30

Erectile dysfunction.

UsernameHere234 | 13

#4548744 - Sunday 10 June 2012 17:39

No. This happened to me the first time I had sex. Both me and my partner were virgins and as such we were very nervous about it. Now though I never have a problem and me and her are VERY VERY sexual.

123josie123 | 11

#4550329 - Monday 11 June 2012 1:14

How exactly does one manage to be "very sex" ?

sirpantselot | 22

#4550994 - Monday 11 June 2012 4:21

I'm stuck at "fairly sex". Need to take the next step up.

writergirl23 | 19

#4551182 - Monday 11 June 2012 5:26

Lol sometimes too much sex can do that too, found it out on our honeymoon. But it is most definitely not erectile dysfunction!

By lucianaamelia | 21

#4547787 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:33

Nearly!

By usarmywife | 19

#4547790 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:34

How old are you? Maybe he needs to see a doctor?

By yoursucklives | 36

#4547797 - Sunday 10 June 2012 12:35

my boyfriend had a hard time putting it in for the first time too. just try to be as relaxed as you can.

aaaaand your solution with the ice cream is genius.