By Anonymous - 08/08/2013 08:03 - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 54 426
You deserved it 4 796

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Top comments

Well you at least got ham

She obviously isn't a baker, but she sure is baked!


Well you at least got ham

Exactly! Ham is much better than cake!!

PterodactylMan 23

Ham > Cake

The cake is a lie. The ham is the truth.

bingbongbingbong 11

Halal friendly cake

salazara 10

This fml is definitely made up!

assassinbanana0 20


klovemachine 24

At least it wasn't a metric cunt-load of ham B-)

108- I am so happy that you made that reference

Granma hits again

It definitely hit you badly.

\ 28

**THIS COMMENT WILL BE BURIED** I guess you could say... *puts on shades* Grandma went HAM. YEEEAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!

This thread is making me cry.

jman26 11

Yeah and grammar didn't do you any good #2

\ 28

Sorry, I couldn't help it. Please accept my earnest apology, to all of the FML community for my soulless attempt at delivering cheap, unbranded humor. I go hara-kiri now

hcollins1 18

51, if you hadn't put '**THIS COMMENT WILL BE BURIED**' then maybe you wouldn't have been thumbed down.

You could say his comment was *puts on shades* Buried Alive. YEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!

\ 28

I thought everyone hated Sunglasses jokes. They were all buried earlier

ElementaryEdGuy 18

She went ham, now send her ass home.

Hey #19- Nice profile pic, fucktard.

ciumegu 6

Make the best out of it. Cook and eat the ham like a cake, better for you anyway.

MichellinMan 20

Not sure how a bunch of raging 5 year olds are gonna make the best of no cake at a party and a hammered senior.

JE553 9

Kinda fitting that the hammered gma brought ham, perhaps she has a sick sense of humor

TheDrifter 23

She's just hamming it up. She's become a comedian in her retirement.

In my opinion that sounds lile the best cake ever

Word! I'd chose ham over cake any day. Especially a ham with candles on it.

At least you got something to pig out on.

Soniye 14

Bacon anyone ?

She obviously isn't a baker, but she sure is baked!

I see what you did there

Do you know what "Baked" means? It's nothing to do with drunk... It's when you're high.

Oh our mistake then

Wow, grandma is crazy if she came drunk and baked.

Oh yea that's my bad I read the FML wrong. Grandma isn't baked.

These comments irritate me greatly.

What's the universal word for idiot? It's America.

shibeep 12

Yourrr HAMtastic!

With all those extra "r's" I don't see why you can't afford an "e."

You have to buy vowels. Consonants are free with a spin.

Maybe, since they're also missing an apostrophe, they meant "Yourrr HAM[ is fan]tastic!" Or maybe they have an irrational fear of E's.

44- Tht cld b prblm fr sm ppl :(

Hey a birthday ham is a long celebrated tradition by the baked ones.

kayteakay 26

I'm sorry your son didn't have the cake he expected.

I'm almost positive he will survive this grievous transgression against all that is good in the world. Protip: The cake was a lie.

kayteakay 26

Little kids get irrationally upset about things like this. Have you ever had to tell a little kid on his birthday that he doesn't have a cake? Meltdown.

Actually little kids prefer cupcakes because they contain a free goodie on the frosting

hcollins1 18

If it really is that important and left the kid heartbroken, all OP had to do was run to the store real quick and buy a cake. It's not like they HAD to have grandma bake one. There's always next year as well! If grandma doesn't decide to get drunk then either..