Work: Today, it was my first big time art show. To celebrate I went... - FML

Nearly

28/09/2021 01:05

Today, I found out my dog of 11 years has very severe cancer. Her spleen, which has swollen to the size of a football, had a small rupture a day ago and would fatally within a week, we'll be putting her down tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29

You deserved it 3

27/09/2021 06:27

Today, I have to get up and go to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54

You deserved it 95

Spicy

Spicy

Unfriended

By thethrowawayplace - 15/10/2021 17:00

Spicy

Today, my friend was watching a black guy getting yelled at by the cops on TV. He then decided to yell, "Wow, ni***** really don't know how to behave!" When I didn't react, he yelled it over and over, until I slunk into my room. He knows I'm part black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 58

Grind mindset

By MyStomachHurts - 15/10/2021 05:00

Spicy

Today, my boss wrote me up for taking too many bathroom breaks. I tried calling in sick with a bad case of indigestion, but he told me to just power through it because, "it can't possibly be that bad." I have been in severe, persistent discomfort the whole damn day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 30

28/06/2009 07:54

Today, it was my first big time art show. To celebrate I went out to lunch with some people who's work was also there. When we got back police were every where. Someone had broken and stolen all of the art. All except mine. Even burglars don't want my art. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 684

You deserved it 5 282

Dysfunctional

Empathy lives

Bodyshaming

30/10/2009 07:45

Today, I decided to adopt a 11 year old dog that has been in need of a home for several months. Two hours after I got him home, I discovered him dead in the backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 581

You deserved it 3 971

She moves quickly!

By Jbug - 31/05/2018 13:30

Today, my girlfriend found a teacher who taught her 10 years ago. He's a complete player, but she fell instantly and madly in love with him and kicked me to the curb. We dated for 3 years and lived together for two. I was fixing to propose in 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 652

You deserved it 322

20/07/2016 06:40

Today, I dropped my knitting project while I was sitting down, but I managed to catch it between my legs. So my knitting needles also caught me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 582

You deserved it 1 356

02/02/2009 11:04

Today, my boyfriend told me he'd help me shave my mustache. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 834

You deserved it 6 648

01/01/2009 03:49

Spicy

Today, I went onto my computer and found a cyber sex conversation between my sister and my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 024

You deserved it 3 139

Bad choice of material, dude

By screwed - 11/03/2020 23:00

Today, I told my on and off girlfriend as a joke that I stalked her two years ago. She didn't believe me. When I say she didn't believe me, I mean she didn't believe it was a joke. FM

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 1 673

09/10/2015 18:54

Today, I saw my cat attacking a suitcase under my bed for apparently no reason. I laughed and picked it up to show him that there was nothing there, only to find a huge wasp hiding under it. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 22 834

You deserved it 2 659

15/12/2010 22:32

Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 268

You deserved it 27 646

Such a Jerry thing to do...

By Jerry - 19/12/2017 15:00

Today, I woke up and realized I didn't start a fire last night. I live in Alaska and our winter nights can reach -30 below zero. My fish are dead, my plasma television won't turn on, and the cat has frostbite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 516

You deserved it 3 197

29/04/2015 01:36

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 227

You deserved it 5 212

18/01/2009 10:24

Today, I tried buying a video game that was rated "M - for mature". The Cashier told me "you have to be 17 to buy this game". I didn't have any ID on me. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 902

You deserved it 4 293

11/02/2016 01:15

Today, one of my friends made it to school. He has been sick recently, missing days out of the week. When I saw him, I greeted him with, "Were you dying yesterday?" Apparently he wasn't, but his grandmother really did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 344

You deserved it 4 286

12/01/2012 10:14

Today, my parents want me to become a lawyer, all because our family members keep getting into feuds and court cases. I'm a successful developer, and run my own company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 727

You deserved it 2 432

Shy bowels

By Dragoness11 - 27/03/2014 14:12

Today, I still have my ridiculous fear of being heard on the toilet, and I can't go if people are around. I'd just sat down on the toilet when three of my housemates started chatting immediately outside the door. I had to sit silently until they were gone. For half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 029

You deserved it 9 615

20/09/2016 08:13

Today, I'm jobless and picked up transcription work online. I typed furiously all day. I have made a grand total of $2.06. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 553

You deserved it 1 352

So no one told you life was gonna be this way…

By Alexxicks - 05/03/2020 12:02

Today, I was asked a security question by my bank's app when I tried using it after a year. After two to three wrong attempts, I got it correct with the answer, "Myself." The question was, "Who was your childhood friend?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 370

You deserved it 244

Drama!

By fuckparents - 09/01/2012 23:01

Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 319

You deserved it 3 635

24/02/2012 21:35

Today, I tried to make a rocket, using Diet Coke and Mentos. It worked pretty well, as both the kitchen window and my chipped tooth can testify. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 741

You deserved it 34 113

08/03/2012 16:23

Today, I was in class and felt something tugging on my hair. I thought it was caught on the chair, so I turned around a little to look. The guy behind me was holding my hair and smelling it. He gave me a creepy smile, winked, and continued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 799

You deserved it 2 529

31/01/2011 17:35

Spicy

Today, my fiancé ended our engagement, saying he wanted to have "one last quickie" for the road. He saw nothing wrong with that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 917

You deserved it 4 019

That's no excuse

By Anonymous - 15/04/2021 08:00

Today, a customer yelled at me because I wouldn’t sell her a boneless chicken bucket with extra fries, beans, coleslaw and Pepsi. I work at Subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 58

19/11/2008 03:44

Today, I tried demonstrate to my little brother that, unlike what he sees in cartoons, it is impossible to slip on a banana peel. I'm not too sure he's convinced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 004

You deserved it 36 741

24/11/2018 16:40

Today, I smelled gas when entering my apartment. I checked everything and then left to seek help. I was told to call 911, which resulted in two firetrucks and 10+ firefighters, one of which was my high school sweetheart, entering my messy apartment and finding nothing wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 829

You deserved it 614

10/01/2010 17:36

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my long time boyfriend and found out I'm severely allergic to latex. I also found out that my family doctor had been transferred to the ER. He went to play golf with my dad later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 573

You deserved it 3 526

13/07/2011 13:31

Today, at a family reunion, my dad announced to everyone that I'd finally started my menstrual cycle. My grandmother started sobbing hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 248

You deserved it 3 084

13/10/2008 08:25

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but in fact, it wasn’t her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 970

You deserved it 108 793

Never cross the streams

By caughttt - 10/02/2010 02:52

Today, I drove my ex-boyfriend home from dropping his car at the garage for new tires. On the way, I drove past my house where my boyfriend was sitting in the driveway ready to surprise me. My boyfriend watched us drive by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 227

You deserved it 43 489

21/06/2011 05:07

Today, the girl I've been dating for several months, and fallen in love with, said "We're just friends, right? My mom thinks I'm leading you on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 826

You deserved it 4 858

03/06/2016 19:46

Today, the police finally recovered my stolen car. All it took was a shootout and two people dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 575

You deserved it 1 930

06/12/2012 02:32

Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 600

You deserved it 2 759

12/05/2018 01:30

Today, I married my best friend in the whole world at a small romantic venue. By that I mean I married my actual best mate while completely hammered at a drive-through wedding chapel. My fiancée is gonna kill me when she finds out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 262

You deserved it 4 620

24/10/2012 10:51

Today, I went to the bar I've always gone to after work for the past 12 years. On arrival, I got banned for life, punched in the nose and thrown out. The barmaid comes out and says, "Sorry, wrong guy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 214

You deserved it 1 882

02/09/2012 10:07

Today, my little sister came home crying because someone had shown her a video about the Slender Man. Trying to calm her down, I explained to her that he wasn't real, just like Santa Claus. She looked up at me and said "Santa's not real?" It's been 3 hours, and she hasn't stopped crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 303

You deserved it 32 577

06/01/2012 04:06

Today, I got pulled over for a busted tail light. The officer gave me a warning and told me to fix it. Ten minutes later I was pulled over again for the same busted tail light by the same cop. This time he wrote me a ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 801

You deserved it 3 682

16/01/2010 20:19

Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 019

You deserved it 3 640

18/12/2015 13:34

Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 618

You deserved it 7 172

07/08/2012 20:13

Today, I was at a Chinese buffet, and I got a fortune cookie. I opened it, and it said, "The love of your life is sitting across from you". The only thing across from me was an empty chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 552

You deserved it 3 510

22/04/2015 15:44

Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 064

You deserved it 2 460

18/04/2017 20:00

Today, I walked into a bathroom to find a dad telling his kids not play with the pee in the urinals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 046

You deserved it 347

06/07/2009 04:03

Today, I was snuggling in bed with my girlfriend. She was depressed, so I complimented her strong legs, saying they were "like a horse." I spent the next hour and a half trying to stop her crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 466

You deserved it 77 622

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:23

"today, my stuff wasn't stolen. FML"

barlessprison 16

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:16

Seriously? You're lucky your hard work didn't get stolen so quit whining. For all you know, the burglars didn't take your art because by the time they reached yours, the alarm went off and they had to make a run for it, not because your art wasn't good.

Comments

ragas 0

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:13

ydi for having suckish art

lmmmr 0

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Sunday 28 June 2009 18:20

It doesn't mean it was "suckish." Have some common sense. Do you think thieves take art to decorate their livingroom? No, they take it for the resale value. As a new artist, you would have none of that. It says nothing about the quality of your work.

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Sunday 28 June 2009 19:13

Hahah this is funny But it's okay cuz you have the whole gallary to yourself, and you didn't get your art stolen so that's not a bad thing really Glass half full

divineinstrument 2

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Sunday 28 June 2009 20:39

#26 speaks the truth, OP. And you should feel glad your art is still there. Oh, and for all the retards commenting here, the OP got his art into an ARTSHOW. That means he's pretty damn good! So stop calling him a bad artist!

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Sunday 28 June 2009 22:01

That's what I was thinking...but if he got accepted into a show then...he had good art? Right? So I really don't undertstand how this was a FML. You had good art, that wasn't stolen...

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Sunday 28 June 2009 22:23

Actually the op is a she.

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Wednesday 16 June 2010 4:58

fyl, now it looks like you stole them

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Thursday 13 January 2011 16:08

Did anyone else notice that it says "police WHERE every where"? I swear some people are just plain stupid. Yes?

rubyredringpop 0

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Wednesday 13 July 2011 18:02

Maybe they didn't OP's art was because it was too pretty. Eh? Eh?

barlessprison 16

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:16

Seriously? You're lucky your hard work didn't get stolen so quit whining. For all you know, the burglars didn't take your art because by the time they reached yours, the alarm went off and they had to make a run for it, not because your art wasn't good.

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Monday 29 June 2009 3:43

I agree. OP: stop your damn whining!! Your irreplaceable art wasn't stolen, and everyone else's was! You're whining because you didn't lose years' worth of hard work?? You don't deserve to call yourself an artist if you're offended that law-breaking art thieves didn't take your stuff. Get over yourself.

Awesomehobo44 3

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Saturday 25 February 2012 16:04

I somewhat agree. Dude, you should be happy that your art wasnt stollen. You should be happy you have the artistic talent to get in to an art show! I fail to see the down side.

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:17

OMG OMG I WILL BE FIRST ONE OF THESE DAYS!!!! YOU WILL SEEE YOU WILL ALLLL SEEEEEEEEEEE MUAHAHUAHAUAHAHAHHAH BsHJ kjsmdasnf;sdlKXZ>C sdcvfdz gdf

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Sunday 28 June 2009 19:23

hahahahaaa

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Friday 7 October 2011 14:16

WTF

somethingawesome 9

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:17

Well if your art is bad, at least you won't have to show it to a lot of people.

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:23

"today, my stuff wasn't stolen. FML"

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Sunday 29 November 2015 0:53

I actually laughed really hard because of this.

Naheelawhatwhat 0

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:24

Get better at your art then and make shit that's actually buyable that people like.

FDXCpinballwiz 0

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:29

FYL??? Now your art piece is the main attraction of the show...since it is well...the only piece. Oh well

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:46

LMAO! :D

CouchPotato47 0

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:32

Some of these FMLs havent been producing the same result that they used to...I might start switching over to mylifeisaverage.com or thetoolbucket.com

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Sunday 28 June 2009 19:57

Good, just leave if you think the site sucks so much. you won't be missed.

CouchPotato47 0

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Sunday 28 June 2009 20:47

Where in my post did I say it sucks so much?? I was just restating what other posters have said before and have said after me, that this is not an FML....so why dont you GTFO

popcorncomics 0

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:33

Are you sure the burglar didn't have enough time to reach it? =/ As one artist to another, just keep practicing. The more important thing is whether or not you like it and with an attitude like that, who would want to look at it?

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Sunday 28 June 2009 17:33

Can you please learn how to write in English? If an 'artist' doesn't know the difference between where-were, who's-whose, then I doubt the success in art.