Ha at least it was dark, either way sucks for you

no i dont know what 15 year olds do at midnight
please enlighten me.

[these question fmls are going to confuse alot of people, no need to answer the question i know what 15 year olds do.]

also, were you turning 15 or 16? confusing!

YDI for being a gook.

Think about it

@ # 58 what does being korean have anything to do with masturbation?

yeah.. at midnight I sleep

because your not working

They drink root beer, eat gummy bears, and play Tomb Raider?

...That's what I do anyways...Then again I am 16, not 15.

i dont masterbate at midnight
thats a waste of my sleep time if im sleeping
and im 15 btw

@67, what does what #58 said have anything to do with being korean??
if this is a repeat text sorry, my computers being dumb

#67 i think by "gook" he meant someone from vietnam but i'm guessing its an epic fail troll anyway because it still doesn't make much sense

I didn't at fifteen either.
Also, to whoever said it; many teens like to stay up late, masturbating or not.



OP, you're supposed to lock the door when you give yourself your birthday present!

Lmao agreed.

uhhh sleep?

@160 "gook" is a derogatory term for Koreans, Japanese & Chinese people.
Kinda like "chink" but chinks are only Chinese.

thats what fags with no life do

Dammit iceman, now I want root beer and gummy bears. Thanks a lot. x_x

LIAR

Lol.

Well, happy birthday. :s

#68 lol you're lying.

id guess any 15 year old would be either asleep or out with friends at that time, but apparently this 15 year old decided to stay home not sleep and have a wank..

I don't know what they do... :( Whatever it is, I guess I never did, I mean, I'm usually asleep by midnight.

Sorry alewiina, all I have at the moment is sour gummy worms and pepsi =(
lmao.

that's why i never jack off on my B-day, i don't want my momma breakin into my room to sing me happy birthday while im nutting. YDI for not holding off, and at midnight? come on dude go to sleep. no one jacks off at midnight unless they are single and really horny.

@ 176, actually gook is just for koreans. the korean word for korea is Han-Gook, which is where the gook comes from. and chink is for all asians, not just chinese. maybe im wrong about chink, but im pretty sure its all asians.

There are a bunch of pussies on FML.

"I'm 15 and I don't even masturbate"
You guys need to grow some balls. Don't act like you don't know what he is doing.

Umm, he's 15, retard. I'm thinking he's single And horny.

That's what I do. Tomb Raider is great at midnight, so is Morrowind.

Nothing Like Choking The Chicken Right OP?

A gook is a racist name for a Korean you dumb fuck.

High-five on the Tomb Raider!

most of them sleep?

is this a very old fml? morrowind? really? oblivion is where its at! or even better fallout 3

you can't be out with friends past midnight every night

umm... yknow what I do at midnight? btw I'm a girl. that makes it even hotter.

i play WoW at midnight...

agreed at midnight I was either hanging out w friends at my house sleeping or watching tv...what has this world come to?

do they sleep

I like to see tat ;)

well said and lol

who said anything about Koreans?

man, I'm 20 and even I now want root beer and gummi worms

WIN!!! XD

what teenager sleeps before midnight

Plutos a cutie!

lol c:

Okay I'm 13 and I never fall asleep before 2. So the people saying asleep, WRONG!

Watch out guys we have a real bad ass over here! Not going to need till 2am wow, what a rebel!
@438

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

Haha, you idiot. I wasn't aware masturbation made you a "pervert".

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

hahaha happy birthday[:

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

Oh the joys of gone away to college...

Do you circle jerk with your roommate(s)? Or do you prefer a back to back kinda experience?

Hahahaha I laughed at that

i don't get it..

then you probably shuldnt be on this website.

Or the person who said this (the I don't get it) is a girl and doesn't masturbate at midnight. If we're going to be completely honest, it would have been more accurate to ask "Do you know what 15 year old guys do at midnight?" I mean, I'm sure there are girls who do it too, but obviously it's more common for guys.

Bla bla, bullshit.

Besides how hard can it be, people complain about being caught, what, do you like do it on your desk or something? You're under covers and shit...

#202, i agree. any FML where you do embarrassing things (or at least something you don't want other people to be seeing) without the door locked YDI. if you don't want anyone to see you "having fun with yourself" then lock your frickin door. anyway, I think you should have expected that they'd come into your room to wish you on your birthday...cuz it sounds like they do it often. but even without that, you still deserve it.

not everyone has a lock on their door

ever think that there is no locks? damn...

really? OP was masturbating.

he was MASTURBATING. tehehe

He was m*st*r-b*t*ng

He was stroking his cat to make it jing jang, thinking about some skiddly boops

Sleep?

.

masturbation?

Ding ding!
That's correct! Lol.

Come on ppl use ur imagination! Hahaha

at OP, that must've been /awkward/! Lol.
U were having a /very/ nice brithday, too bad ur parents kinda spoiled it.
Well hopefully soon you'll be able to look at them in th eyes and not wanna hide cuz they saw u beatin ur meat lol.

Just take me advice and don't do that when ur parents are home, it's really never as safe as u think it is just cuz you're in ur room.
Better luck next time :)

ps. Happy birthday

#45

That was really long. And the sad thing is, I sat and read the whole damn thing.

-_-

Yeah, if I can take anything from my time wasted reading FML, it's that when I have a son I should always knock before entering his room! Same with daughter if I recall my teenage years... hahaha.

I did the same thing... one minute of my life wasted..

grosss

Brilliant timing you have there.

maybe make the whole anecdote more clear?

I'd say its pretty damn clear

You're an idiot.

Save it for when your parents aren't home, sir...

Even stay at home parents have to shop ! Or just get out of the house sometimes ! Unless they're, like, wizards or something and they can make their food and all the other shit they need appear outta thin air and all their friends come to them all the time. And it usually doesn't work like that !
And OP, if your gonna masturbate in the middle of the night, why would you not have the covers on ! Hey hopefully your parents won't try that again, and if they do, no offense but your parents are idiots !