By Anonymous - United States
Today, it was my birthday. I was heading back to my apartment and I heard noises inside the door. Assuming it was the surprise party I'd hinted at, I flicked on the lights as two heavy guys pushed past me. I was robbed. FML
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I hope OP's birthday present will be a house restoration, like ones from those TV shows. Or maybe OP's friends could pitch in to remodel his house after everything was stolen, like new furniture.

I'm sorry to hear that OP. FYL. I hope something great compensates for this on your birthday.

  bunniex1  |  11

24/82 you aren't being pessimistic enough! You have to say. And then she was brutally stabbed while watching her beloved dog get run over by a semi. The End