Today, I wore a bikini to the lake with my parents. I didn't know that my back was covered in bruises, and ended up having to awkwardly explain to my parents that I am not in an abusive relationship; the bruises came from the sex I had last night. FML
Add a comment
Top comments
COMMENTS
By
wisericky
| 12
You should have been like.
"You should see the other guy"
"You should see the other guy"
Reply
lex1459
| 38
You should have started crying and claiming the demon from the conjuring was after you
Reply
soccerstar1996
| 18
OPs like, "Yeah, I wrestled a bear while drinking Dos Equis"
Reply
webbface
| 25
I find it kinda odd that your entire back was covered in bruises just from sex. Jeez I thought I was rough for scratches and little marks. Now I know if I actually wanna be rough I need to tell my bf to punch me constantly in the back while he is getting me from behind. Oh get a whip and whip the shit outta my back! Or smash me into some rocks! Jeez forget pleasure, bring on the pain.
I hope you just bruise easily.
I hope you just bruise easily.
By
michelleJ11
| 25
Bet that took a lot of convincing ... Sounds like an interesting conversation though. Hopefully it didn't end with one of your parents stores of their experiences ...
Reply
michelleJ11
| 25
Stories** whoops.
By
roflstomp716
| 19
guess you were cruisin' for a bruisin'..
Reply
PterodactylMan
| 23
That had to hurt OP
By
Zimmington
| 21
Well, he was technically beating Something up.
Reply
missfrenchie
| 11
He was beating... dat ass *cue Barney video* say it with me now.. Dat Ass~
By
Zimmington
| 21
Irrelevant received cunnilings
Reply
CoffeeChickBlows
| 13
What the fuck are cunnilings? Oh, you meant "cunnilingus"? Well your comment still blows.
Reply
Zimmington
| 21
Yeah I meant cunnilingus but my my phone kept correcting it. Anyway I knew this comment would get thumbed down but I thought it would prevent more "Doesn't matter had sex" comments. But since #10 is exactly that I failed twice.
Reply
Clioo_fml
| 17
Correcting it to cunnilings? Since when do phones autocorrect to nonexistent words?
Unless you've been using that word before continuously...but for what?!
Unless you've been using that word before continuously...but for what?!
Reply
RoboCunnilingus
| 23
Someone say cunnilingus?
By
KinkyCurly
| 13
Kinky
By
Juneyah1017
| 9
Y'all have sex on the cement?
Reply
KiddNYC1O
| 20
Nah, they had great sex.
By
AllyBrianne
| 10
Doesnt matter- had sex
Reply
dweeds508
| 24
Real original comment, #10. Never seen that before
Reply
kernelkat
| 16
I for one love lonely island references
By
kee_breezy32
| 34
must've been some good sex!
By
challan
| 19
Take the pictures off the wall before you get lifted against it. It's all fun and games...
"You should see the other guy"