Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. -Mom and Dad." FML
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By
Grayness_
| 26
Or you could just use your hand which is free ! :D haha
By
grahmagog
| 14
give it back and tell them to buy headphones
COMMENTS
By
Grayness_
| 26
Or you could just use your hand which is free ! :D haha
Reply
Sinistra_Blue
| 12
Now works without batteries! Buy one get one free!! :p
Reply
theTrollGuy
| 7
Actually, you don't have to buy at all! You already have two... I hope. :|
Reply
ElricMustang
| 23
That was kinda the joke... :/
Reply
Sinistra_Blue
| 12
The joke is only funny if you're not an amputee. If you are then I sincerely apologize. >.>
Reply
jasmine2301
| 25
Duh guys! #38 was trolling!
Reply
Kstruggles
| 15
I'm assuming that you are a guy. One's hand just can't always compete with or fulfil a gal the way a vibrator can.
Reply
OctoberJade
| 12
You're a guy, you don't get it. Once I switched to using a vibrator, my hand just didn't do it for me anymore.
Reply
ZeusBeDubsteppin
| 24
my hand doesnt work fir me very well.. i have small hands
By
olpally
| 32
Lol. Awesome mom and dad you have there! Hahaha.
Reply
Caitie_kid
| 8
She should slip a not under their door saying "I need 20 more dollars, vibrators are expensive."
Reply
Sweet_Meli
| 11
Oh the embarrassment D;
At least they didn't walk in on you, and had the courtesy to slip you a note ;)
At least they didn't walk in on you, and had the courtesy to slip you a note ;)
Reply
AprylAnn
| 23
I was thinking the same thing!
By
grahmagog
| 14
give it back and tell them to buy headphones
Reply
Jasmeent11
| 15
I don't think they're going to want to listen to music to cover up some smaller noise when they are trying to sleep...
Reply
grahmagog
| 14
then noise cancelling headphones?
Reply
vipirius
| 18
Those usually don't work that well when there's no music playing.
Reply
girlbye23
| 15
Why give it back? Keep the money and slip a note.
By
naznafeathers
| 22
Free money? Your life is definitely not fucked :p
By
150493x
| 29
Looks like your parents are buzz kills
Reply
Became_fml
| 10
I see what you did there
Reply
Axipiter
| 24
Sigh... We all did, 22.
Reply
MoronsAccount1
| 12
God dammit, 22.
This is why people born in 1998 shouldn't be here.
This is why people born in 1998 shouldn't be here.
Reply
tommylover842
| 23
Guys give 22 a break. he's new.
Reply
MoronsAccount1
| 12
This has nothing to do with anything here, 40, but 14 siblings?
My god.
How have you not, you know, ended it yet? lol.
My god.
How have you not, you know, ended it yet? lol.
Reply
SlapAndTickle
| 20
#40 I see you're new too. Also, the whole "give so-and-so a break" doesn't fly here either. People have to learn the ropes somehow.
Reply
arroberts
| 10
I have never seen a place more filled with sarcastic, egotistical assholes. Glad to see a place I belong in. But damn...
Reply
Axipiter
| 24
It'd be pretty boring if the only comments were "Awww, I'm so sorry to hear that happened to you. Things will get better! xoxo" Just like it gets boring constantly having someone tell us that they "see what you did there." Being a sarcastic asshole is way more fun.
Reply
thisguy22
| 33
@36
I'm more inclined to blame it on the fact that he is a ginger...
But that's just me.
I'm more inclined to blame it on the fact that he is a ginger...
But that's just me.
Reply
MoronsAccount1
| 12
It feels like home, 98. It feels like home.
Reply
hashshim
| 21
I mostly visit FML to read comments made by cynical, sarcastic, and clinically narcissistic members.
Reply
evan_7899
| 28
And there is those retards who vote down a sarcastic vote because they are too stupid to understand it and take it as a rude conment
Reply
mmahlke93
| 6
obviously 40s mom didn't need a vibrator
By
DocBastard
| 38
$30? Hell, a dildo only costs $8 or $10!
According to my research, with that much dough you should be able to afford the Anal Violator 5000XXL. It may not be that quiet, but you surely will NOT be.
Enjoy!
According to my research, with that much dough you should be able to afford the Anal Violator 5000XXL. It may not be that quiet, but you surely will NOT be.
Enjoy!
Reply
Welshite
| 39
We need Boners here for his expert opinion.
Reply
Saone_fml
| 27
Please tell me where you buy yours, because here a basic one costs MORE than that. ^^
Reply
PenguinBitch
| 43
Yeah Doc, tell everyone where you buy your dildos.
Reply
TheDrifter
| 23
I hear the hospital's sexual dysfunction ward gets a great bulk discount...
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
I get mine from hospital Lost and Found. A few wipes with industrial strength cleaner and they are good to go.
I mean, what dildos? I don't have any dildos!
I mean, what dildos? I don't have any dildos!
Reply
Caitie_kid
| 8
Any good VIBRATOR is going to cost anywhere between $50-$100+.
Reply
manhands21
| 6
i work at an adult toystore. Anything $30 with thay kind of name isn't worth it.
Reply
linyah
| 11
walgreens has them for under 30$ o3o
Reply
botanistjessica
| 24
I feel like it would be really awkward to buy a dildo at Walgreens.
Reply
Spider_Web
| 11
Just plop a 12" dildo on the counter and try to hold eye contact
Reply
linyah
| 11
that is why you can get them off their site too so the akwardness isn't there..or check groupon too XD
Reply
MerrikBarbarian
| 9
Pink cherry is the best source for cheap quality sex toys. If anything is defective they will exchange or refund it. Refunds arrive in less than 24 hours. They also indicate the noise level on many of their products. Op should really shop there... And no I don't work for them... Just a very... Satisfied customer :p $10 dildo? I got mine for $5 if you wait for their sales. The $10-15 vibes I got there are better made than the piece of crap $50 vibe I got from OhMiBod. Yes I have no shame. I used to do sex toy reviews. :p hopefully that info helps people anyways.
Reply
amalraj
| 1
Good advice
Reply
mangalomelon
| 7
what is this thread
By
Jellybean22
| 14
Well that's awkward... At least they gave you money
By
Zaros_fml
| 24
At least they didn't give you any bad vibes over it.
By
Became_fml
| 10
Just buy a premium dildo with that money
Reply
vipirius
| 18
Dude, you're 14. Why are you even on this site?
Reply
Kyuubi_Rose
| 11
Because its a free website with no age control on who can sign up?
By
Zen_Mei
| 17
I heard the lipstick vibrator is very discrete
Reply
Zaros_fml
| 24
Did a "friend" tell you that? ;)
Reply
monnanon
| 13
i had the lipstick one. wasnt any quieter than any other bullet but was good for the price.
Reply
whatismissing
| 8
Or the pocket rocket.
Reply
Zen_Mei
| 17
#33 haha google did. I have the 'rabbit ear' tho but er never mind