Miscellaneous: Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached...

By CandyMachine - 16/02/2011 23:58 - United States

Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 816

You deserved it 9 834

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By Not my day - 28/11/2022 21:00 - United States

Today, I tried to get something out of a vending machine. It got stuck. I tried getting something else to knock it down. That got stuck too. I tried a third time… take a wild guess. One massive tirade later, someone came and tried to help me out. Stuck. Four times in a row. How is that even possible? FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 161

By aquagoddess - 03/07/2018 19:00

Today, I used the last of my money to buy a bag of vending machine chips for dinner. It got stuck. A passerby saw and generously offered to buy another bag of the same chips to dislodge it. Gratefully, I accepted his offer. It stayed stuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 737

You deserved it 264

By Z'ev - 05/04/2013 16:34 - United States - New York

Today, I went to get my car fixed. There was a vending machine in the waiting room, and I was hungry. The snacks were overpriced, but I still had a little money left over. I noticed a bag of Cheetos hanging loose, so I paid for them, hoping to get two bags. They both got stuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 478

You deserved it 10 036

Goober

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 02:00

Today, at a local mini mart, I tried several times to open a door that clearly said "PUSH" by pulling it, much to the amusement to the customers and staff inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 771

By Eodowoiono - 06/08/2013 16:20 - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, as a joke, my friend put my bus money in the vending machine. Not only did the machine not return my money, it wouldn't give me an item in return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 308

You deserved it 4 598

By quarterback - 23/01/2011 05:43 - United States

Today, while at the vending machine, I put in my $20 instead of my $1. I got my change back in quarters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 098

You deserved it 44 595

Great idea

By dumbbb - 27/12/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 263

You deserved it 46 015

By iblamethetories - 11/10/2012 17:49 - United Kingdom - Colchester

Today, I had to pay my bus fare in very small change. After carefully counting out coins under the withering glares of a bus-load of people, I quickly slid them into the machine, and somehow ended up jamming it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 829

You deserved it 4 852

By Anonymous - 07/04/2009 15:51 - Japan

Today, I was in a store using the only bathroom there. After I was done, I realized I couldn't open the door. Panicked it locked me in, I banged on the door, and screamed for help. The security and a whole group of people gathered, only to find that I was pulling the door instead of pushing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 443

You deserved it 91 589

Flustered

By Tygastyle - 23/06/2009 17:37 - United States

Today, at the bank, I went to get some coffee from their machine. I gave it my money and pressed the buttons but nothing was happening. After banging on the machine for ten minutes and calling a teller over, a little boy reached up on his tippy toes to press the giant green START button for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 523

You deserved it 63 290

giantsofeast 2

Thursday 17 February 2011 8:59

lol you remind me of homer Simpson

schwiggidy 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 8:59

when it don't fit in the slot, harder! harder!

Comments

justinfailz 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 9:11

what would you do for a Klondike bar xD

atomicJ 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 9:13

Use your foot. Tada!

superwerid14 0

Friday 18 February 2011 10:50

look at the puppy!!

lil_lala209 5

Thursday 17 February 2011 9:18

this sounds like something out of family guy that Peter would have done... lol

mrahhhhh 21

Thursday 17 February 2011 9:24

For extra fun, try reading this FML while saying "THAT'S WHAT HE SAID" after every sentence while sleep deprived like I did.

daiissyyy 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 16:41

hahah!

Tonky 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 9:40

Jimboom 11

Thursday 17 February 2011 9:51

In Russia vending machine eats YOU!

FYLDeep 25

Thursday 17 February 2011 10:00

Did you post this FML from inside a vending machine?

ChibiGirl5 0

Friday 18 February 2011 8:38

how would she have her phone with her while her hands are stuck??

marlie_x 8

Thursday 17 February 2011 10:11

hey I would do the same thing for my food

fiveonefiveoh 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 10:11

u wrote this, so... Ur life's not ****** ;p

pepelapew 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 10:26

major tard

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The Top

Today, it's my husband's and my first wedding anniversary. I came home from work hoping for at least a bouquet of flowers, only to find my husband passed out on the couch, with a few beer cans next to him. I guess I missed the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 771

You deserved it 218

Today, I'd thought I was somewhat friends with a girl, the only person I actually talked to outside of school, but after overhearing a discussion I think she may actually have restricted me on Instagram, because I've "always pissed me off anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 92

The Top

Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 475

You deserved it 5 290

Today, as always, when my dad says he needs my help and that it will only take 15 minutes, it will actually take all day because he doesn't plan ahead. This has happened three times now, so this time I demanded he compensate me for my time if I have to drive out there. He called me an "entitled little shit" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 187

Today, I met a really nice couple at a bar. We talked and the conversation eventually drifted towards online dating. I casually commented that hooking up through the internet was sad and pathetic. Turns out they met on Myspace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 891

You deserved it 68 013

Today, a hummingbird somehow got into my house. I spent two and a half hours trying to get it out after finally using a blanket to catch it. I run outside to release it from my hands, and it flew back into my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 362

You deserved it 6 352

Today, as I was getting out of the car, my 7-year-old son opened the door for me. I thought it was very gentlemanly of him to do that, until he smashed my thumb with the car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 996

You deserved it 1 331

Today, I was at the bakery I work at. A man came in to pick up a cake he said he ordered, but we could find neither the cake nor the order form. He yelled at me about being 'incompetent' before remembering that he had ordered the cake from a different bakery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 111

You deserved it 2 997