Health: Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse...

By Anonymous - 24/12/2010 07:15 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse stuck the Otoscope into my ear to look, she was disgusted. When she pulled it out, she told me that I had an ear infection, and that she'd popped a pimple in there by mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 853

You deserved it 5 308

Health

Mind the handbrake!

Creepy

We need to know more!

By helpme - 25/09/2015 13:46 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, I wrote my boyfriend a love letter during class and told him to read it when he got home. He texted me later asking me why I gave him my school assignment. I must have handed the love letter in to my teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 293

You deserved it 7 729

By MoonStarShine3 - 09/06/2015 16:12 - United Kingdom - Chorley

Today, my boss yelled at me for being 3 hours late. I was late because I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. Apparently, breaking my arm is not a good enough excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 369

You deserved it 2 054

By Anonymous - 27/10/2010 18:57 - United States

Today, I decided to put on my Halloween make-up to be sure that I could and that it would look nice. I was satisfied with my results, and went to wash it off. Everything came off fine, except for the eye liner and eye shadow. It's bright purple. I'm a man. Halloween isn't until Sunday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 907

You deserved it 31 163

By erjazo - 31/12/2013 21:19 - United States - Morris

Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 157

You deserved it 6 821

By Anonymous - 07/02/2011 21:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on the phone to a guy I really like from work. We'd been talking for about 2 minutes, when he said he was getting another call, and put me on hold. I was so excited to be on the phone with him, it took me a whole 15 minutes to realise he had actually just hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 208

You deserved it 7 374

By Anonymous - 15/08/2017 21:30 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, I received a text from my girlfriend's female best friend that they have been dating for the last month. This was the week of our one year anniversary, and my birthday. We just moved into a duplex with my name on the lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 102

You deserved it 293

By YouAssholes - 09/12/2013 23:25 - United States - Anaheim

Today, my band members and I were brainstorming ideas to help increase our fan base. My drummer suggested they replace me for someone attractive. Everyone agreed and now they are trying to kick me out of the band I started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 577

You deserved it 3 765

By chinousmc - 06/12/2012 11:30 - United States - Clearwater

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 788

You deserved it 3 396

Need more details, please

By Anonymous - 27/07/2021 17:01 - United States - Spring Hill

Today, I fucked up a relationship, by accident, and then they broke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 618

By Anonymous - 02/07/2015 04:49 - Australia - Townsville

Today, I quit my job so I wouldn't have to work with this one complete fuck-wit anymore. I told him what I thought of him, and then walked away giving him the middle finger. Turns out, he is a regular customer at my new job. Everyone loves him and thinks he's awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 208

You deserved it 10 130

By blahbags - 06/04/2009 13:39 - United Kingdom

Today, I was going on holiday. As I was checking in my bags, I said to the really cute steward, "I think I'm overweight." He told me about discounts for customers of 'larger proportions.' I was talking about my suitcase being overweight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 731

You deserved it 17 743

By Anonymous - 07/01/2011 02:59 - United States

Today, after lifting a 20 pound box of oranges for a woman at work, she turned around to say "Your acne needs help." I still had to tell her to have a good day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 096

You deserved it 2 914

By Noname - 15/02/2009 05:44 - United States

Today, I stood by the wall at a party while everyone else danced and ignored me. It was my birthday party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 883

You deserved it 11 567

By montextes - 25/07/2011 16:12 - United States

Today, my mom finally learned how to text. Now it's her way of communicating, even when we're in the same room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 234

You deserved it 3 938

By Anto - 03/12/2008 06:11 - France

Today, in front of a hospital, I noticed that an old lady was having trouble lighting her cigarette because she had Parkison's. So I went to help her to light it up and she then started chatting with me and told me she had lung cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 869

You deserved it 6 868

By jdch_99 - 03/11/2012 05:34 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 698

You deserved it 1 732

By buckley456 - 28/05/2012 03:33 - United States - Glenolden

Today, my remote control airplane arrived in the mail. I was super excited, so naturally I took it outside for its first flight. It now resides at the top of the tallest tree in sight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 743

You deserved it 8 928

By friend - 29/06/2012 20:48 - Israel - Rishon Le Zion

Today, I was babysitting a little girl, and we were playing with dolls. After we fed her babies, we put them down for a nap. After a few minutes, I asked if they'd had enough sleep. She looked at me like I was a freak and said, "Uh, they're not real babies, you know..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 617

You deserved it 3 664

Global stinking

By Anonymous - 22/09/2019 20:00 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, my boyfriend told me he thinks brushing his teeth and doing anything basically hygienic is unnecessary now, because, "we're all going to die out around about 2050 anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 499

You deserved it 154

Just a prank, bro

By unlucky dudebag - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw while wearing hockey masks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 255

You deserved it 4 723

Parent #1 of the Year

By no i'm sure you're a responsible parent - 09/04/2020 02:00 - United States

Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 558

You deserved it 173

By nickorion12 - 28/06/2016 14:21 - United States - Shawnee

Today, it's my birthday. My children decided to make me "breakfast in bed", only to end up setting the kitchen on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 556

You deserved it 1 277

By whatzthehell - 03/06/2009 10:31 - Kuwait

Today, I woke up with a splitting headache. Then someone at work wouldn't stop whistling loudly and it was getting on my nerves. "Can the dick who is whistling please stop?" I asked. It was the general manager of my department. I'm still on probation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 594

You deserved it 51 342

By be_nj - 29/05/2009 03:51 - United States

Today, at work as a cashier, I had a male customer come up to me and ask me what hours I worked today, like he has done for several weeks now. Immediately after, my manager calls my lane to tell me to watch out for that guy. He has been stalking a co-worker of mine. Apparently, I'm next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 473

You deserved it 4 155

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 05:18 - United States - Seattle

Today, my wife told me she'd rather bust up concrete than get it on with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 696

You deserved it 3 917

By pathetic_girl - 14/10/2010 14:45 - Canada

Today, I accidentally admitted to two girls in my first year university astronomy class that I have a strict 10pm bedtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 675

You deserved it 33 406

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 04:40 - United States

Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 508

You deserved it 2 932

By stuck - 17/06/2009 03:42 - United States

Today, I was working as a service writer in an auto service shop. A really cute girl came in to buy a headlight, I offered to install the bulb for her. My hand got stuck behind the headlight, she had to ask one of our mechanics to come remove the air box from her car to get my hand out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 806

You deserved it 10 463

Hello Alanis ? We've got something for you.

By Anonymous - 27/02/2021 00:30 - Germany - Wolfsburg

Today, two people at work - both higher up than me - called me out for "stomping" when I walk up stairs. I have a disability that causes this. We work at a place specifically for disabled people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 46

By Anonymous - 09/03/2011 09:52 - India

Today, while stuck in a traffic jam, my son silently changed my gear to reverse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 862

You deserved it 7 097

Abalaschabalamanama

By help meeeee - 14/03/2021 17:01

Today, and ever since we watched a documentary about televangelists scamming people, my boyfriend randomly imitates them speaking "in tongues" because he knows it freaks me out. He's really good at it as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 144

By letmediealready - 22/12/2017 19:00

Today I saved my wife's puppy from drowning in an icy pond and I ended up in the ER struggling to breath from the water in my lungs. When my wife showed up to see me, I caught her flirting with my doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 673

You deserved it 321

By Drew - 30/11/2014 03:20 - United States - Harrodsburg

Today, it's my birthday. My grandma posted about it on her Facebook wall, but people got confused and thought it was her birthday instead. She got twice as many birthday wishes as I did, and that's including the ones I got outside of Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 652

You deserved it 2 988

By Escape! - 03/02/2009 21:38 - United States

Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecologist exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 495

You deserved it 4 242

By EmmaG123 - 28/02/2009 05:54 - United States

Today, I sent my mom an email with "Bad news" for the subject. At the end of her reply, she said, "And don't scare me! I thought you were going to tell me you're pregnant!" I AM pregnant, and wanted to surprise her on her birthday. Guess I should get her something less disappointing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 930

You deserved it 5 078

By anti88 - 01/09/2011 01:55 - United States

Today, I reached the point in my life where Target is the "expensive" store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 995

You deserved it 4 522

By arrow - 23/02/2016 20:39 - United States - Pomona

Today, the officers of my archery club forgot to check if anybody was behind the targets looking for arrows. I got hit in the leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 587

You deserved it 1 995

Themed

By Anonymous - 18/11/2020 05:03 - United States - Burlington

Today, I blew Christmas out of my nose. Out of one nostril came thick green mucus, and out of the other, thick red blood. Let the holiday season begin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 125

In the zone

By fgs - 29/11/2020 23:01

Today, after joking with the guy I've been talking to for 8 months about his plans for my birthday, he told me he didn't want to 'lead me on' and wants to stay friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 702

You deserved it 150

By Anonymous - 10/08/2018 18:30

Today, I finally had sex with my live-in boyfriend after a long dry spell. It was passionate and great, until I hurt my back changing positions. Now he refuses to touch me, going as far as sleeping on the couch to give me "enough space". Hello new dry spell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 186

You deserved it 372

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Top comments

Mirorbo 26

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:09

...She's a nurse...she shouldn't be 'disgusted' by things like that. I hope you get your infection cleared up, darling!~

memo619 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:14

haha at least you finally popped that sucker, I hate pimples on the ear

Mirorbo 26

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:09

...She's a nurse...she shouldn't be 'disgusted' by things like that. I hope you get your infection cleared up, darling!~

Doortje 29

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Friday 24 December 2010 13:04

Exactly. This makes you wonder how she'd react to 'other' kinds of disgusting situations.

alexFYL 11

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Friday 24 December 2010 14:00

This is practically the reason why I want to be a nurse, I love disgusting things!

_Damien_ 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 14:18

Something you'll never hear, "when she pulled out..."

_Damien_ 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 14:23

it*

sugarr0babby0 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 16:32

I was just about to eat... :X

phatdaddy62 23

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Friday 24 December 2010 19:09

Have some banana pudding with whipped cream!

iivann 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 20:39

ew! WTF

doink 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 20:47

It's funny how you assume that all nurses are obligated to like disgusting things. Most nurses can tolerate all sorts of nasty stuff, but there is usually always that one thing that makes us want to gag. We are people, too.

Hayllee 4

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Friday 24 December 2010 21:10

I think peoples main problem was that she openly showed her disgust. It's one thing to walk out of the room and gag and talk about it, and it's another to make a patient feel embarrassed and nasty. It's a pimple, she could have held it in. Yeah, ear pimples suck OP.

CrabCaviar 0

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Saturday 1 January 2011 0:14

lol

Oreohugzpenny 4

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Tuesday 3 July 2012 2:13

Did it squirt puss?

TimeDisposalEngi 14

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:11

That's disgusting

Tanya101 4

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Monday 27 December 2010 11:16

i agree

wetchy 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:12

nassstyyy

memo619 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:14

haha at least you finally popped that sucker, I hate pimples on the ear

nikkibihm 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:22

that sucks lol

thequick 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:27

Seriously dude, basic hygiene.

memo619 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:33

hygiene? it's a pimple how the f*ck are you supposed to pop one inside the ear

iLoveMisaCampo 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 13:14

the same way the nurse popped it...?

Waffle817 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 16:39

by accident?

Acousticpixie14 6

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Friday 24 December 2010 21:24

You can pop them with a bobby pin. You didn't feel that you had a pimple in your ear? Those ones hurt. If I was going to the doctor to have something specific checked out, I'd make sure that something was clean and presentable before I left the house. That just seems like common sense to me.

Grimmerie 31

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Thursday 24 February 2011 9:37

and then you have pus in your ear. wheeee! no thanks. i'm happy to dab a little benzoyl peroxide on and let them disappear, rather than pop them and allow all the blood and sebum to fester in my ear.

FMLforALL 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:32

I hope you get an ear wax removal kit, a bottle of rubbing alcohol and a box of q-tips for Christmas! There's no excuse for nasty ears! Blech! I'd be disgusted, too, nurse or otherwise!!! FYL-YDI!

Flounder 2

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Friday 24 December 2010 13:11

You're ignorant, and you're embarrassing yourself with your comments.

pinkdottedbow 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 15:32

Agree with 14.

catatonicsleep 17

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Friday 24 December 2010 18:59

if you insist on pouring stuff in your ears use olive oil not alcohol

smashgrab 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 19:20

40- I've used hydrogen peroxide for years to clean my ears out, I highly recommend it! Never heard of using olive oil, how's that work?

catatonicsleep 17

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Friday 24 December 2010 21:22

it softens the wax

SamSayzRAWRZ 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 12:43

Wouldn't you have noticed already? Yuck.

mercedes3210 6

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Friday 24 December 2010 13:09

Probably, since we are all able to see what goes on in our ears.

loserboii 11

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Friday 24 December 2010 20:42

we call it a mirror

mercedes3210 6

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Friday 24 December 2010 22:06

You are still not able to see in great detail.

kethery 0

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Friday 24 December 2010 13:11

it was not disgust due to ur medical problem, but rather due to ur filth.

Blue_Black_fml 21

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Friday 24 December 2010 13:25

Why is everyone assuming that OP doesn't practise personal hygiene?! Ear infections can happen to anyone and the nurse was probably disgusted from the infection and/or pimples, which actually makes her a lousy nurse..