By blindsparrow - 18/11/2014 05:35 - United States - Dublin

Today, I went out to get milk from the garage fridge for my mom. The moment I stepped out, my foot settled on the neighbor's boa, who likes to escape. After my mom finally opened the door to my frantic shouting, she spotted the snake, slammed the door, and locked both of us outside. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 350
You deserved it 2 935

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Where's Samuel L. Jackson when you need him?

Mom of the year.


Where's Samuel L. Jackson when you need him?

Wizardo 33

Didn't he tell you? He's tired of those muthafucking snakes.

He is avenging those stuck on a plane

asnakelovinbabe 16

We don't need Samuel L. Jackson! We need the owner of the snake to learn how to properly contain his pet! It's not good for the snake and it's not ok for the neighbors to have to deal with it. It is very irresponsible on the keeper's part. It is not hard to secure a snake in a proper enclosure. I should know, I have 70 of them and the only time we can have escapee's is if I were to make a mistake and leave a cage open and even then, the snakeroom is completely sealed preventing them from getting far. OP, next time I wouldn't hesitate to deliver the snake to a rescue, or call one to come pick it up. If he can't properly contain his snake, he needs to give it to someone who will.

Mom of the year.

you couldn't get outside through the garage door?

For some houses you can

They were already outside

How was he supposed to know there was a snake outside?

shelbycobra0991 8

That sucks, OP. And your neighbors need to be more responsible about their pets.

At least it's just a boa. Hopefully the owner learns how to properly take care of their pet, because they seem rather negligent.

Just a Boa? There's a reason they call it a Boa can kill you. They're not venomous, but that doesn't mean a snake can't kill you.

Size matters in this case. Even a meter long boa won't kill you easily - unless it's wrapped around your neck - and since OP was stepping on it, small chance of that happening.

@6 - I don't think that's why they call it a boa constrictor, otherwise they'd just call it a "boa axe murderer".

Boa axe murderer made me chuckle. That is a sketchy animal right there. I think you may have inadvertently just created a new sci fi low budget film right there.

Call dibs and proposition the SyFy channel before he does!

#6 boas are a lot less aggressive than pythons and don't get as big. The odds of being killed by a boa are very small. And since it's in the garage it would be cold and when boas are cold they don't have the energy to do anything. I have a 6 foot red tail myself and she's never tried to attack anyone. If they are starved and never handled that's when they can get aggressive. And wow those neighbors need to get their shit together, it's not hard to keep your boa in it's enclosure.

It doesn't matter if that it probably couldn't kill you, it could kill a pet or small child and even as an adult being attacked by a big snake is not fun. If the snake can escape so easily and attacks people it should be taken away from them.

ash0158 15

Read the fml. The snake didn't attack anyone, op stepped on it... It probably likes to escape because it doesn't get enough attention and I doubt it was aggressive or op's mom would have called for help (maybe haha). Op should send the neighbors an angry worded letter and watch where they are stepping :p op: yls. But that's still kinda funny. And hopefully the snake is okay

asnakelovinbabe 16

It's called a Boa Constrictor for ONE reason. The Latin name for the common pet boa is "boa constrictor imperator". That is it. It has absolutely nothing to do with "it can kill you". Most nonvenomous snakes do kill prey using constriction, even small snakes such as corn snakes. If you honestly think boas kill people, try looking up the actual number of snake related deaths sometime. It is EXTREMELY small. Take away venomous snakes and you've got, almost nothing. Except for irresponsible people making very poor decisions with their pet reticulated python or african rock python. Dogs and horses send people to the ER or to a coffin every single day, and yet they don't have this negative stigma associated with them. Snakes harm maybe a handful of people per year, and most of those people were harassing the snake and ended up bitten by a venomous animal, getting what they deserve. Want to know how to avoid being harmed by a snake? Leave it the hell alone. Be aware of the local species that live in your area, and wear proper footwear if going into their habitat. Want to know how to avoid having your child or pet harmed by a snake? Supervise them. Don't let them go wandering off alone into boa constrictor land or rattlesnake country. If you have a large pet snake, LOCK THE THING UP. It's not rocket science. You have a far better chance of being killed by lightning, a vending machine, or a falling coconut than you do a snake. (That was not a joke, google it if you're curious, I can't even make this shit up)

I love reading your fascinating novel-length comments on snakes. (no sarcasm)

asnakelovinbabe 16

33, boas are not any more or less aggressive than pythons. That statement is complete and utter hogwash. "Aggression" (better described as defensiveness) in snakes largely depends on the species and most importantly, the individual. First of all when you refer to "python" you are covering a gigantic group of snakes spreading over many continents and genus, that look and act nothing alike. Within this huge group are snakes of every shape and size, from the tiny Anthill Python which is 20 inches long and sits in the palm of your hand fully grown, to the enormous reticulated python which is incredibly intelligent and holds the record for length in living snake species. It's the same with Boas. There are many types of boas, tiny finger sizes ones that eat snails for a living, all the way up to the female green anaconda, who of course holds the record for weight. I have met very defensive boas who hiss loudly and wanted to tear my face off, and I have also met very calm boas who make fantastic pets. Same with pythons.

asnakelovinbabe 16

Thanks 43 :) I'm just here to spread the truth about these misunderstood creatures... because when I read threads like this I honestly want to poke out my eyeballs. The amount of misinformation that people pass around about snakes is seriously alarming.

Snakes are wicked awesome creatures. I have 3 ball pythons of my own and want to get a boa when I have the money. I hate the stigma surrounding them. It's really sad to see the irrational fear that many people have. :(

#44 As an animal lover and Ravenclaw, I appreciate your information about snakes. I think it's cool to see snakes wrapped around people's arms and necks.

NotGabe 28

I really wanna know what happened next. This needs a follow up.

Boa aren't very aggressive unless tormented, so you should've been fine lol

Stepping on it wasn't tormenting it?

Fear is a powerful thing. Sorry OP!

Hop in the car...that's the best bet

RandomUsername88 24

When I first read "boa" I thought it said "bra" and I was very confused for a second lol

Damn bra constrictors, pushing up boobies until the wearer suffocates