Awkward, Tattoos and Intimacy: Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought...

By UnluckyInk - 18/02/2013 08:50 - United States - Manlius

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 319

You deserved it 49 700

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

For life

By thats_not_good - 28/05/2009 18:15 - United States

Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. Fifty minutes into the tattoo on my back, the artist said, "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 405

You deserved it 56 241

By branded - 14/05/2009 19:57 - United States

Today, I found out the tattoo symbolising my marriage turned out to be more permanent than the marriage itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 484

You deserved it 60 616

Inked

By damnit - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 937

You deserved it 64 672

By anon - 08/03/2009 08:47 - United States

Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a 'talk.' Now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 886

You deserved it 76 899

Memento

By Anonymous - 20/06/2023 03:00

Today, my quite squeamish girlfriend came with me to get my latest tattoo. She saw a few drops of blood, screamed in the tattooist's ear, and completely fucked up part of the outline. She had to alter the tattoo drastically to cover up the mess and now it just looks bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 675

You deserved it 501

By scaredinnyc - 14/11/2012 01:03 - United States - Trenton

Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 994

You deserved it 31 386

New kink unlocked

By sausages - 17/01/2014 20:56 - Macedonia - Skopje

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 161

You deserved it 8 430

Great idea

By aridaley - 21/05/2011 23:33 - United States

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 534

You deserved it 64 991

By slut - 29/08/2011 16:22 - Canada

Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 359

You deserved it 59 267

By authentic - 18/02/2009 23:20 - United States

Today, my tattoo artist boyfriend of five months gave me my first tattoo in celebration of my 18th birthday. It was supposed to be a heart with my name in script. He spelled my name wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 859

You deserved it 17 428

xLIGHTS_fml 23

Monday 18 February 2013 16:58

That's why you should know what the tattoo means first!

Kidkaplan 19

Monday 18 February 2013 16:57

You should also get a 4-leaf clover for food luck

Comments

SwiftyOTH 6

Tuesday 19 February 2013 0:12

You should have really researched what it meant before you got the tattoo, It was stupid not to

monkiki62 5

Tuesday 19 February 2013 0:38

Uh yeah. It didnt dawn on you to research the symbol meaning before getting the symbol tattooed on? Ydi.

lenamartinovic 13

Tuesday 19 February 2013 0:48

Sounds to me that the '****' and you will be best friends.

lolita88_fml 27

Tuesday 19 February 2013 0:56

Dude, who the hell can read the knots anymore? I'm Irish, born IN Ireland, not Irish because my American cousin's mother's dog was Irish like half the Yanks seem to think they are, and no one I know here can read the knots so honestly, no one'll know what the hell it means anyway. Your 'very Irish' family are incredibly unusual in that aspect. Do they speak Irish? Half this ******' country doesn't!