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By kfoehslfns / Sunday 1 August 2010 08:45 / United States
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For all of you saying "it's her choice" you're right but also realize thats this is a a major issue in a marriage and can lead to divorce. It's unfair for him to force her to become a mother and it's also unfair for her to expect him to spend the rest of his life without ever knowing what it's like to become a father (if he stays with her). Children don't suck, it's all in how you raise and discipline them.

By  ONYA

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you don't want kids! what's the purpose of having them? it's just a lifetime responsibility.. I don't hate them but it's just idk I can't find a reason on why to have em.. just because Ur married doesn't mean u have to have kids enjoy urselves until Ur ready financially and mentally

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but it makes it seem like u care so ,no offense is a win win and OP u shud show your wife you can handle having a kid thn she'll love the idea of a soon to be child..... :D..!

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I clicked fyl because your wife sounds really immature. That is a really bitchy way to make a point! On the other hand, you deserve it because you guys didn't talk about having kids before you got married. That's kind of a big deal to not bring up before hand.

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YDI for your wife waking you up at 3:00am with a loud recording of a baby crying so she could get her point across that having kids sucks ass.

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You're an idiot-birth control doesn't come in a bottle, it comes in a packet where each pill has to get torn out one at a time. It'd pretty much be impossible to replace them with fake ones. Plus, coercing a woman into getting pregnant when she doesn't want to is a dick move, not to mention a sure-fire way to ruin her life and cause her to resent her husband for the rest of their marriage (even if she doesn't find out it's his fault). Even if your little scenario were to somehow work & she got pregnant, what would stop her from getting an abortion if she really, really didn't want to have the baby? Not only would that probably end the marriage, but it would also most likely devastate the OP. This fml is really a fuck-her-life. Let's not make it a fuck-his-life too, mmkay?

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83: Maybe people like 68 are part of the reason for that! When I was on the minipill (hormones, but no estrogen), it came in a similar calendar pack -- even though the dose was the same for each day (no placebos).

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Your wife is extremely smart. If you want a baby thats how it will be for SEVERAL months before he/she can sleep through the night. If you're complaining about it on here, you are most likely not ready for a baby.

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A teen is worse! My sister and her 14 yr old friends sneak out at 1am and walk across town for the fun of it. Not to mention 14 yr olds taking a car and driving it in the middle of the DAY! And the attidudes you get! Good luck!

By  ONYA

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yeah, because we all know that if a woman turned around and said they wanted a baby but the boyfriend/husband didn't that she's gotta have one(!) It's both their decision, and his wife is being childish about it....rather than saying she doesn't really want one and explaining why.

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It being "her choice" depends on a lot of things. Did she say she didn't want children before they got married? Was it ever discussed? Does she simply not want a baby now, or not ever?? If she recently changed her mind about having a child, and her husband still wants one, then it shouldn't just be her choice. Sounds like this has the potential for an annulment.

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Tossing the first and second definition out the window, I think that third definition is debatable. I can see many adequate returns, but biologically speaking, possibly not. The prevention of the extinction of said organism's species might work.

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I'm appalled at the ratings here. I guess people really do view babies as parasites that leech off of their parents. Just want to throw out there that everyone was a baby once, so the idea of having a child is not something to negatively approach. At least they won't be procreating, I suppose.

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let's not debate the technical definition of the word parasite, as that's not particularly insightful. the point is, pregnancy carries a risk to the mother's health and even life - even in this day and age, things can go wrong. when someone does something that involves risk, it's generally considered important that they have made the decision to take part in that activity themself, without pressure from others. which means that yes, it is right that the decision to have a child should be made by the woman.

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If her final choice really is not to have a child, does her husband maintain the right to choose to have a baby with someone else?! I guess one would need to stop and figure out where personal choice fits within the context of a marriage. I'm not saying that someone can force her to have a child, but a spouse changing their mind about children is grounds for an annulment.

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That comment being negatively voted just shows that plenty of women on here must be childish. All i did is point out it's both peoples' choice in a couple whether they have a baby or not. As the person i replied to made it out like it's only up to the woman. By that, i mean if she wants it and he doesn't, it'd be unethical for her to trick him into getting him pregnant (whether it's by lying about being on the pill or putting holes in the condom or insemination or whatever).

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I agree completely. Both are required to make the decision. I'm going to go so far and say the people rating comments down are just women with sand in their vagina that wish humans reproduced the same method angler fish do. I mean, a comment comparing a baby to a parasite getting rated up? Get out of here. Thumbs down away, ladies! I wish you well in your quest for male angler fish.

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Who said he was pressuring her? He said, "brought up the subject of having a baby with my wife"...in what backwards universe does that mean pressuring? God, try reading before you blame him! Yes, in the end it's her choice if she wants to have a baby, but that doesn't mean the OP should have to just go with it because 'what she says goes'! The OP simply brought up the subject to get her thoughts on it because he may want children. Looks like he may need a divorce, and to start over with someone who wants the same things he does.

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121 - Funny how you seem to be blatanly pro-life, yet you wish another poster was aborted because you didn't agree with their opinion. I bet you'd be lined up outside the clinic to stop them from being aborted had they been a fetus. You're dismissed.

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