By Anonymous - 15/09/2012 18:34 - United States - Metairie

Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML
I agree, your life sucks 7 561
You deserved it 34 159

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Why the hell would that be your first reaction? "Somebody tapped my shoulder - I'm gonna punch their nuts!"

You're way too paranoid


You're way too paranoid

Every stranger on the internet must be a pedophile, a stranger on the street must be a rapist, everyone these days are so paranoid.

Well, when you're not expecting someone to touch you, it can really startle you!

29- you either say "@16" or "16-" before a reply. Don't mean to be a bore, but I was seriously confused.

Paranoid or not , sounds like a start of love story to me.

are you black by any chance?

...I must seem worse with my initial reaction to a stranger confronting me. My initial thought is usually, "Holy hell! A serial killer!" Must be all those episodes of Crimminal Minds getting to me.

at least OP now knows chasing that dream of hers to become a ninja may not be so unrealistic! :D

I'm curious op... What would you do if you turned around to sack someone only to find it's a girl... Assuming she's a serial killer turning around only would make the murder easy for her.

Why the hell would that be your first reaction? "Somebody tapped my shoulder - I'm gonna punch their nuts!"

OP must live in a REALLY bad neighborhood

She must make friends with guys really easily with that kind of response

No, research shows that many rapists grab girls by the hand... not exactly a scary gesture.

Yeah because someone tapping you on the shoulder obviously has devious intentions...

When my friends husband started open carrying, he became SUPER paranoid. In the store, she was feeling playful and tried grabbing his butt. He freaked out and threw his arm back to punch which resulted in her getting a black eye from his elbow. He thought someone was trying to pull his gun out of the holster. Which was on his right hip and she grabbed his left butt check and was standing to his left. So I can see how someone can get that paranoid if they work themselves up over it. Like the possibility of the "shoulder tapping racist" lol.

66- because a random stranger on the street grabbing your hand wouldn't set off warning bells?

At least op knows how to defend herself

Maybe he shouldn't be carrying if he is that paranoid. Next time he might just grab the gun and shoot

Yes because muggers and rapists always tap your shoulder to get your attention before they grab you! Great ninja reflexes OP.

*Tap Tap* "Excuse me kind sir, would you mind relinquishing your possessions to me now? Thank you ever so much. Have a good day."

"Excuse me sir, do you have a moment for our Lord and-" *oomf*

Maybe OP has had a bad experience in the past, that could explain OPs reaction.

I don't need my wallet right now so feel free to borrow it.

Well she was wearing headphones and you can't mug someone if you don't have their do they hand over their things if they don't know it's happening?

Thanks for the useless comment... Now get thumbed down to oblivion.

um 36...I'm just going to point out that your comment was just as useless. It was definitely not needed.

I think 4 is trying to ask whether OP had already hit his nuts before finding out.

Well one person understood.....

So now you look like a dick.

thats what they call a "dick move".

You should get punched in the tit then

Just the tit though. No boob.

Her third one, too!

Under her armpit!

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

if you noticed she said she turned around to punch him in the crotch and that doesnt sound like an accident

8- You think? Still doesn't justify her reaction.

Well, 'by mistake' you can always punch her back in the butt and yell, "surprise butt secks?"

At least you have ninja reflexes.

Why the hell was your first reaction to hit him?

Whoops, didn't see #2's comment.

You're fine! :)

... *focuses binoculars above*

*put eyeballs right in front of binoculars* It's a chicken.