Today, I was one of five people called up to the front in class... - FML

By leftout - 13/5/2010 07:39 - United States

Today, I was one of five people called up to the front in class to receive a special notice from the school administration. The first four people received awards for outstanding effort in school. Mine was a notice that I had overdue library fines. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13415

You deserved it

28253

Tweet

Share

Work name

DINOSAURS!!

Higher standards

By harry - 4/12/2009 05:55 - Hong Kong

Today, I started growing hair on my upper lip. I'm finally becoming a man! Too bad I'm a 17 year old girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42868

You deserved it

5185

Tweet

Share

By - 15/1/2017 08:00

Today, after getting home from shopping, I noticed a security tag was still on one of the shirts I bought. I decided to take it back and ask them to remove the tag. They then accused me of trying to steal (even after I showed them the receipt) and kicked me out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8018

You deserved it

548

Tweet

Share

By penpendesrapen - 11/3/2010 00:40 - Philippines

Sink-dodger alert!

Today, I went to the bathroom to take a piss. While washing my hands, I heard someone taking a large dump in one of the stalls. When he was finished, he left the bathroom without washing his hands. Turns out he was the IT guy I called to fix my computer. He sat down on my chair and used my keyboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30252

You deserved it

2430

Tweet

Share

By RedEye - 11/7/2017 17:30 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, my contact ripped in half in my eye. One half fell out, but the other half got stuck too far under my eyelid. An hour and $100 later, Urgent Care finally got it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4527

You deserved it

308

Tweet

Share

By Broke - 4/12/2013 08:27 - United States - The Colony

Today, I went to an ATM to see how much money I had in my account. I put the card in. It never gave it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48849

You deserved it

4103

Tweet

Share

By badbed - 11/12/2009 17:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a friend over. We found my older brother's camera so decided to look through his photos but then we came across photos of him and his girlfriend having sex. We were laughing up until my friend decided to point out that they were having sex on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26645

You deserved it

7393

Tweet

Share

By wetandhungry - 6/10/2016 13:11 - United States - Houston

Today, I came home to find water dripping from the ceiling in my apartment laundry room/pantry. All of my groceries were ruined. Maintenance's suggestion? "Put a bucket under it." FML

I agree, your life sucks

9611

You deserved it

695

Tweet

Share

By Tallie - 1/10/2018 12:00

Today, I fell down the stairs, breaking my foot and tendons. It was the first time I had ever broken anything, and the doctor said that it's the most complicated break he'd ever seen. It's too complicated to operate. Now I'm stuck in a wheelchair for god knows how long. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3067

You deserved it

187

Tweet

Share

By How? - 29/9/2018 10:30 - United States - Glasford

Today, a bird crashed into my face. I didn't think that actually happened to people outside of cartoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2911

You deserved it

187

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 25/8/2019 06:06

Today, my mother sat me down and told me, "I'm not going to lie, I hate living with you. Please get a job and move out." I'm 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1993

You deserved it

210

Tweet

Share

By Nutty - 24/6/2009 05:10 - United States

Today, I was sitting next to this cute guy on an airplane who I had started talking to. There was still an empty seat between us and it seemed like there weren't any more passengers boarding the plane. I then asked out loud, "I wonder if anyone will sit between us?" He replied "I hope so." FML

I agree, your life sucks

47075

You deserved it

12430

Tweet

Share

By baconrash - 22/2/2010 21:43 - United States

Today, I found out that the acne under my arms was worse then the severe acne on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29771

You deserved it

3663

Tweet

Share

By space_cadet90818 - 8/3/2010 00:16 - United States

Today, I woke up with one of the worst migraines I've had in months. My mother (who thinks I'm a hypochondriac) began to scream at me about "making up an illness". When I asked for my meds, she called me an addict and dumped my $300 prescription down the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34387

You deserved it

2910

Tweet

Share

By FuckedByLife - 12/2/2017 19:00 - United Kingdom - Bridgend

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend of two years was cheating on me. How? His other girlfriend crashed her car into mine and had him pick her up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8793

You deserved it

510

Tweet

Share

By Jeezus - 16/2/2016 03:00 - Canada - Saint Albert

Today, after a week of waiting to hear something about my stolen car, I got a letter in the mail saying it had been impounded the same day I reported it stolen, but they don't share a database with the police so they never called. Now the impound wants $900 plus $120 for the tow to release it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20178

You deserved it

1603

Tweet

Share

By TheNaturalOrderofThingsSucks - 11/9/2012 03:13 - United States - Seattle

Today, after pouring my heart out to a beautiful girl on Facebook, and having her return the favor, she typed a final message that read, "That was my friend. Please f*ck off now. Thanks." FML

I agree, your life sucks

27473

You deserved it

7182

Tweet

Share

By baddream - 25/4/2009 01:44 - United States

Today, at my grandmothers funeral I tried my hardest not to cry, only allowing tears to fall and not making any noise, to be respectful at her funeral. Afterwards, my mother tells my father that I didn't cry, which obviously meant that I didn't love my grandmother and had no soul. FML

I agree, your life sucks

65098

You deserved it

4650

Tweet

Share

By ashleyramsay - 23/10/2009 19:13 - Canada

Today, I heard whimpering while I was in my bedroom. Thinking it was my parents doing something nasty, I let them do it and turned on my music. My parents came home from work and I realised they were never home. I went into the room and saw my dead dog laying on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks

57485

You deserved it

11629

Tweet

Share

By ducky2721 - 2/1/2010 13:46 - United States

Today, while working my overnight shift, I went into the isolation room to find some items for a former client. The door fell shut and the magnetic lock went to work. Both unit telephones and my cell phone were lying on the desk, and I waited four hours for my supervisor to rescue me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26559

You deserved it

4803

Tweet

Share

By stay in there - 17/4/2020 23:00

Dumbasses

Today, I got a call from the local police station. Apparently, my idiot son and his equally dumb girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to have sex in the car at a park in broad daylight. They assumed no one would be there due to the quarantine. They were wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2019

You deserved it

253

Tweet

Share

By IloveJapan - 2/4/2012 14:02 - Japan

Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30324

You deserved it

10098

Tweet

Share

By darn it. - 20/2/2009 16:16 - United States

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

I agree, your life sucks

51910

You deserved it

4130

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 24/8/2009 07:09 - United States

Today, I ended up gashing my leg rather badly on the corner of a chair, fell to the ground with a very loud thud, and yelled "OH F*CK ME!!". I hobbled to the bathroom making more noise in the process. My neighbor came by and asked if I could "keep my sex noise to a minimum". FML

I agree, your life sucks

41545

You deserved it

7542

Tweet

Share

By zawbentley - 26/9/2009 07:01 - United States

Today, I called my boss to let her know that I was suffering from severe depression and that my doctor suggested I take a month's leave. Her response: "Glad you are getting help, however we can't hold your job. No need to come to the office, we'll mail your stuff to you." FML

I agree, your life sucks

39900

You deserved it

6344

Tweet

Share

By Alanis - 21/7/2012 01:59 - United States

Today, I confessed to my co-worker that I've secretly loved him for months. He laughed hysterically for about a minute straight before shaking his head and excusing himself from the store. Even the fact that my boss fired him for leaving early isn't cheering me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25345

You deserved it

4005

Tweet

Share

By thelandofoz - 14/10/2009 14:36 - United States

Today, I noticed that my clothes had shrunk. My mother seemed to be having trouble with the new washer and dryer so I tried to show her exactly how they work. After my explanation she said "I know how they work. I shrank your clothes to give you some incentive to lose all that belly you got." FML

I agree, your life sucks

31692

You deserved it

7632

Tweet

Share

By MacGrouber - 17/3/2011 00:12 - United States

Today, my bird learned to mimic my fire alarm. It proved it to me at 3 am. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34733

You deserved it

4693

Tweet

Share

By Anonimo - 8/11/2012 21:22 - Italy - Monserrato

Today, after a year of living with my boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24979

You deserved it

2593

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 27/1/2013 22:44 - Canada - Rosetown

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

I agree, your life sucks

44627

You deserved it

8525

Tweet

Share

By Noname - 24/2/2009 23:57 - United States

Today, my hard drive on my computer crashed with all of my files on it. I took it to my Dad, who is a computer analyst, to see if he could recover anything. The only thing that he could salvage was my illustrious collection of porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22444

You deserved it

66160

Tweet

Share

By fml_forever32 - 23/12/2009 18:56 - United States

Today, I was in the bus on my way home. I was reading a book, and drops of something were getting all over it. It was the man sitting next to me who was asleep and drooling. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25032

You deserved it

2479

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 1/7/2012 17:09 - United States

Today, my husband and I went to the store. Because we have no car, we had to walk four miles in the 115 fahrenheit weather. It didn't click until we were standing outside the door with a metric shit-tonne of ice-cream, that we'd have to tear ass back home to keep it all from melting. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8231

You deserved it

30059

Tweet

Share

By 34_22_34 - 28/7/2010 19:27 - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed. He said we’d go pick up the ring tomorrow. Then he asked to borrow $40 to get it out of pawn. He pawned it when his ex gave it back to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39104

You deserved it

4769

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 28/12/2011 15:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I ran into an attractive friend of a friend who I hadn't seen since a night out last month. I tried my best to be friendly and interesting, but he still seemed awkward. Later I find out that last time he saw me, I was blind drunk and vomiting after propositioning him all evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10876

You deserved it

30953

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 24/10/2009 14:58 - Canada

Today, after drunk texting a girl the night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. All she could say back? "Those were some of the most normal drunk texts I have ever read. I'd hate to see how boring you'd be sober." FML

I agree, your life sucks

32223

You deserved it

7542

Tweet

Share

By Anna - 25/7/2020 05:10

Masterchef

Today, my partner, our 5-month-old baby and I had to go to A&E because my idiot boyfriend mistook dishwasher rinse aid for cooking oil, and cooked a meal for us in it. As I'm breastfeeding, even our baby needed blood tests. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1427

You deserved it

193

Tweet

Share

By Ferniferousfern - 2/3/2018 15:00

Today, I went to the dentist for a tooth extraction. Not only were they not able to extract all of it, but after 7 injections, I was still screaming. The best part? Their referral to someone else fell through, so I head back tomorrow to finish the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3798

You deserved it

223

Tweet

Share

By Mia - 26/1/2019 02:00

Today, I wanted to bake some chocolate chip cookies. As the first load was done, I tasted a cookie and it tasted too salty. Thinking it was because of the pinch of salt, I added more sugar to the batter, only to realize that the sugar I've put into the whole batter was actually salt. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1025

You deserved it

2285

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 29/8/2009 00:59 - United States

Today, I left for college. I spent hundreds of dollars on clothes, bedding and other things. After packing my entire closet and everything else I needed, I left only to have to head back home. My dad forgot to pay the first semesters tuition. He said "Oh well, you would have failed out anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks

56601

You deserved it

3863

Tweet

Share

By parkertownparadise - 16/2/2012 07:43 - United States

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25074

You deserved it

4741

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By TheBarnacle | 4

#991809 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:41

you got owned. big time.

By perdix | 29

#991930 - Thursday 13 May 2010 14:52

The whole "awards ceremony" facade was just a big scam -- it was really a school-wide intervention to confront you about your hoarding behavior.

They want you to go to the meetings of Pack Rats Anonymous. It's like all of those 12-step programs, except that it's only 4 steps. They don't want you bastards hoarding steps!

COMMENTS

By tacoking5000 | 0

#991753 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:05

agreed

Reply

ActionManly | 11

#991766 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:10

Fail.

Reply

mona_is_here | 10

#991816 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:43

ActionManly, are you the guy on the right side of your pic?

Reply

ActionManly | 11

#991826 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:52

Haha nope ;)

Reply

mona_is_here | 10

#991827 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:53

daaamn I'm not good at guessings xD so the girl?

Reply

Ali_Br_fml | 33

#991853 - Thursday 13 May 2010 13:18

or just maybe the 'manly' man in the middle? actionmanly, r u a man?

Reply

mona_is_here | 10

#991858 - Thursday 13 May 2010 13:20

ActionManly got us alll intrigued :D

Reply

RedPillSucks | 31

#991918 - Thursday 13 May 2010 14:41

Erm....
More intrigued by Ali_Br....

Reply

PinkieKeen | 20

#4795676 - Friday 10 August 2012 5:01

No your not getting a reward your getting a fine

By eihtballplaya_fml | 4

#991758 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:08

better late than never you did the right thing

Reply

radmuffin | 12

#991919 - Thursday 13 May 2010 14:41

Haha same when I was in high school. I once kept a book the entire school year and they didn't care. LMAO Sucks for you OP.

By matt1337c | 0

#991761 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:10

You have to be a dumbass not to get one of those awards. YDI

By andruha1123 | 5

#991763 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:09

ydi for being a lazy dumbass!

By roxxy_surf | 0

#991767 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:14

um thts not even bad :/ ahaha complaining bitch FYAFP

By andruha1123 | 5

#991770 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:13

WTF!? I posted like 5 comments on last few flms and none showed up?!!

By Miss_lunatic | 8

#991772 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:14

Hahahah

By roxxy_surf | 0

#991777 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:17

none of my comments are showing!?

By UsaTrackstar | 0

#991781 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:20

Aye where the jawns wit the fake tits at?

By supermannewt | 0

#991784 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:23

#13 is HOT

Reply

roxxy_surf | 0

#991805 - Thursday 13 May 2010 12:39

aw thanks 17 I can't really say anything about you considerig you don't have a picture...

Reply

supermannewt | 0

#992101 - Thursday 13 May 2010 21:49

I can't find my camera sry. + I'm using the iPod fml app so i gotta use a computer to do tht and I'm away from it 4 a while sry :-S