Transportation: Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home in the middle of...

By limeychefboy - 23/02/2018 01:30

Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home in the middle of nowhere when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 717

You deserved it 2 255

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Same thing different taste

Wet helmet

By RyanSmithN - 15/01/2010 05:04 - United States

Today, I used a public bathroom and set my motorcycle helmet on the sink while I used the urinal. The helmet rolled into the sink, under the faucet and set off the motion detector, soaking the inside. I drove 15 miles home in 30 degree weather with a wet helmet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 269

You deserved it 9 225

By maybenot - 06/08/2012 23:25 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 826

You deserved it 29 934

Nature is harsh

By fallsdownplenty45 - 02/06/2009 11:08 - Taiwan

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 922

You deserved it 6 728

By cathugger - 13/07/2019 16:30

Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 921

You deserved it 130

By SmellyLeg - 20/11/2017 15:00

Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several meters. While my helmet saved me from a cracked skull, nothing could protect me from landing leg-first in the dog poop somebody hadn't bothered to pick up. I had to go to school like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 319

You deserved it 323

I want to ride my bicycle

By Anonymous - 27/06/2021 14:02

Today, I decided to ride my bike for the first time in over a year. It was seemingly going well, until I got to the first hill. As I began to ascend, I was trying a bit to hard and shit my pants, 8 kilometers away from my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 874

You deserved it 290

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 12:17

Today, I was having motorbike lessons. We were parked by the side of the circuit when one side of my gloves dropped on the ground. I tried to pick it up without getting off the bike. I lost balance, fell off the bike and the bike landed on my leg, trapping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 895

You deserved it 1 226

BIKES

By ihpgolj - 18/06/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 871

You deserved it 43 966

Take that

By Anonymous - 30/07/2009 00:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was riding my motorcycle when I saw my cheating ex-wife walking down the road. Out of anger, I spat my gum at her. I forgot that my helmet's visor was still down, so when I spat, the gum stuck against it. I was temporarily blinded and I crashed into some bushes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 146

You deserved it 77 683

By hatesgravity - 02/09/2010 11:40 - United States

Today, after finally getting up the nerve to take my motorcycle to up 75mph on the freeway, I made it off in one piece, only to fall off my bike in the mall parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 929

You deserved it 25 592

RichardPencil 30

Friday 23 February 2018 4:13

Now the other drivers are going to think you had your head up your ass.

mercedesm 28

Friday 23 February 2018 8:41

You should have buried it.

Comments

Zekfen 17

Friday 23 February 2018 1:36

On the bright side your day couldn't get any crappier right?

simply123 7

Friday 23 February 2018 1:43

What a shitty situation

manb91uk 22

Friday 23 February 2018 2:25

I guess you’re 200KM up shit street without a saddle...

chubbear 14

Friday 23 February 2018 20:35

Paddle, my dude

Miss_Whipped 43

Friday 23 February 2018 2:34

So... what did you use for toilet paper?

RichardPencil 30

Friday 23 February 2018 4:13

Now the other drivers are going to think you had your head up your ass.

Lobby_Bee 17

Friday 23 February 2018 7:17

Assuming you meant the shit got inside your helmet, you could take your shirt off and wrap it around your head before putting it back on your head. Not illegal to ride without a shirt but illegal to ride without a helmet.