By danggit3290 - 03/05/2009 17:17 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "you know, I am looking RIGHT at you," FML
I agree, your life sucks 26 955
You deserved it 89 229

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Top comments

holy crap CLOSE THE DOOR.

YDI for not closing the door. On the other hand, FYL for having a stepdad who would stare at you while you're masturbating instead of, I dunno, walking away.

Comments

eewwwwwwww at the top it says OP is a girl awkkkwwarrdd

Starcraft is to hand as Studies is to girlfriend. With a few exceptions.

334, why is it awkward when it's a girl but not when it's a guy?

Next time that happens look him/her in the eyes and finish like a boss

hahaha. sorry man, i guess close your door.

#2: the OP is a woman, Dear Poster, why did you not just stop and pretend like you were asleep or lying down? :s

He thought I was texting, I am not allowed to text after 10... He still, to this day, had no idea what I was really doing. xD

Thats kinda hot, OP, if you are really a chick.. Were you being to noisy?.. Or, did you use the pillow?.. I reckon you might have been noisy.. I mean, how often does your step-dad stand outside your room at night, watching for movement..

holy crap! this is the only fml I have ever seen where the op posted something in the comment section. they never give us any consolation for our many questions!!! :O

Lucky OP that he didn't realize what you were actually doing! Way less awkward even if you did get in trouble for texting

holy crap CLOSE THE DOOR.

As soon as I read "...with the door open, I voted YDI"

i don't my dying dog will pant and pant at the door if i close it

thats kinda creepy.....not gonna lie

gross... were you still stroking when you were looking at this figure??? YDI

if you look closely the op is a girl, which makes this more creepy....

317- on the contrary, I think it would be even more creepy if op was a guy or if she was looking at a girl that whole time

rofl...thats hilarious...hope you learned your lesson

Your step dad watched was watching you jack it...I wonder what he went and did after that?

probably tried to blind himself

deff. a chick so jacking it means poking it..hopefully not with a closed fist..

that's why you close the door.

ew, why would he stay there and stare back? D:

YDI for not closing the door. On the other hand, FYL for having a stepdad who would stare at you while you're masturbating instead of, I dunno, walking away.