Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
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By
JustinThunder
| 8
Apparently she couldn't keep him up either.
By
Anupants
| 0
That is a no bueno.
COMMENTS
By
Anupants
| 0
That is a no bueno.
Reply
CryMoreFMLs
| 14
His long-long -childhood- sweetheart?
Dang, kids arestarting early this generation.
I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
Dang, kids arestarting early this generation.
I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
Reply
L3Paparazzo
| 7
wata buzzzkill , ruined a goood time :P
Reply
hannahcorrine
| 0
Wow, major FYL. That guy is very inconsiderate to bring up someone else during such an intimate moment..
Reply
LiveLaughFML
| 10
long-lost childhood sweetheart? whoa, when I was eight, I use to use my mouth to argue with people over who's light up shoe is the coolest, not to give a BJ :P
Reply
morganrules123
| 10
When I was a kid I thought I'd get pregnant from being kissed on the cheek but I'm only 15 so I guess I'm different then my generation.
Reply
flockz
| 19
HEY ME TOO!!! I ALWAYS USED TO ARGUE ABOUT HOW COOL MY SHOES WERE! I HAD LIGHT UP SHOES UNTIL....
well now.
well now.
Reply
GuitarFail123
| 9
lol ik... light up shoes were the COOLEST!!!!:D
Reply
LiveLaughFML
| 10
why did my comment about light up shoes and BJs get deleted? lol(:
Reply
sickjairo
| 7
I'll melt in your mouth not in your hands
Reply
TheRealHouse
| 7
You must obtain his man card, and turn it in at once. and yes you have to do it, he does not even deserve the honor of turning it in himself. The bright side for you op though is that you have full rights to keep his balls in your purse, but don't worry, they won't take up too much space.
Reply
YourEvilHero
| 12
that's when you bite his dick to make sure he doesn't mention her again. lol
Reply
Keyman1212
| 14
Tastes like teen spirit!
Reply
Johnny2by4
| 0
be quiet mad girls, you're all just mad that you don't have a guy who cares about emotions because you date jerks. it is okay if he burst into treats, it shows he is human and has feelings too. he doesn't only want sex because he has a genuine care for people
Reply
d0hhhhhhhhhEY
| 0
I am available. When the boyfriend can't get it done, the situation will step up to hit a homer
Reply
SirObvious
| 1
Wish I could burst into treats too.
Reply
sleepydeath
| 4
Squirmy worm in you mouth 0.0
Reply
mgsoloist
| 14
119 is gay. Sorry but if a guy starts crying over someone a long time ago, he is clearly not ready for another relationship, and he's a pansy. And not to be stereotypical, but I haven't cried over a relationship and I'm a girl. I would laugh if he started crying mid-blowjob because of how ridiculous it is.
Reply
Jammy01jams
| 2
131 = Heartless bitch.
You know there's this thing it's called feelings.
Clearly this guy wasn't ready, I don't blame him though breaking up with someone you loved is hard, and getting into a new relationship is the easiest way for a guy to move on and try to forget.
You know there's this thing it's called feelings.
Clearly this guy wasn't ready, I don't blame him though breaking up with someone you loved is hard, and getting into a new relationship is the easiest way for a guy to move on and try to forget.
Reply
mgsoloist
| 14
But you shouldn't put someone else through that if you're getting over someone. If it bothers then that much, then they should go through a healing process, but don't bring someone else into the mix, making it harder.
Reply
StoryOfTheYear
| 13
That is a "no good"
0.o
Lol improv Spanish :D
0.o
Lol improv Spanish :D
Reply
Sweet_Testicles
| 7
lol 40 you're stupid as hell.
Reply
chickenpie90
| 16
LOL
Reply
_Oblivion_
| 12
43 heelis or wutever the hell they are used to be the shit when u were like 7
Reply
ggdawg24
| 0
68- 50 cent referance ftw
Reply
Keyman1212
| 14
Actually 245, that's the M&M's candy slogan. Not a 50 Cent reference.
Reply
xdevil44445
| 2
Haha never again
Reply
ms_fancypants
| 15
Guys can burst into treats?? Whoa!
Reply
sleepyolivia
| 14
119: I'd be so mad if my boyfriend did this, not because he's crying but because he's mentioning an ex-lover in the presence of his current one which is really rude. There are very few off limits topics for relationships, but exes is definitely one and anyone with half a brain should know that.
By
JustinThunder
| 8
Apparently she couldn't keep him up either.
Reply
Krennicus
| 0
*Brohoof*
Reply
genesisnirvana
| 11
I wonder is OP dumped him.That would get a RISE out of him.
Reply
every1luvsvag
| 10
Well played sir.
Reply
Johnny2by4
| 0
brofist it. leave it to females to think they're always right and men are left at fault
Reply
annasworld
| 3
limp weenie alert
Reply
hexblot
| 10
It puts a whole new spin on "melts in your mouth, not in your hand"!!
By
wooni0104
| 2
www mushy penis
Reply
bizarre_ftw
| 21
Omnomnomnomnom *shudder*
Reply
Pandaloverr
| 0
Like applesauce!!!
Reply
bizarre_ftw
| 21
Or jello after a trip through the blender!!! :D
Reply
mgsoloist
| 14
90-I sooo did not need discussion about a blender and a penis in the same post lol.
Reply
DropTheDaggerxx
| 31
www mushy penis? Is that a url? www.mushypenis.op?
Reply
StoryOfTheYear
| 13
90- Jello thru a blender would result in chopped pieces of jello
Hopefully you are not implying that the same result happened to the OP's BF
D:
If so, OP must've been pretty dang pissed that he went all buzzkill on her
Hopefully you are not implying that the same result happened to the OP's BF
D:
If so, OP must've been pretty dang pissed that he went all buzzkill on her
Reply
decidedlyvague
| 11
what about a penis in the shap of a blender? omnomnomnom daiquiri?
Reply
wooni0104
| 2
I meant eww mushy penis
By
magicrock
| 8
childhood?
Reply
glutgyoogle
| 6
All the cool kids in elementary school did it.
Reply
jbluebird923
| 0
So the OP gives head like 10 year old. Upsetting
Reply
WCARlover
| 34
It could mean they started liking eachother early in their childhood but the childhood lover couldve went down on him when she was in her teens
By
jbluebird923
| 0
Wow. But shouldn't that be a turn off for you..?
Reply
jumpshot23
| 0
Thank you captain obvious.
Reply
bizarre_ftw
| 21
^idiom alert!!! :D
Reply
frankieredsox
| 7
Some of us are slow... and them some are SLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW
Reply
applesuckers
| 0
#169 Wow...
Reply
Babalu722
| 3
i think that comment was so stupid, i found it funny and thumbe it up
Reply
picklezz123
| 5
why can't anyone here spell?
Reply
Saltime
| 0
230 - The same reason nobody can capatalize letters.
Reply
ohrlynao
| 0
*capitalize
Unless that was on purpose, in which case I lol'd.
Unless that was on purpose, in which case I lol'd.
Reply
maryrain
| 0
i ttally agree! r thees peepole stoopid err sumting??
By
oneleggedbeauty
| 0
So try going harder? Maybe doing it more sexy?
Reply
jumpshot23
| 0
Do I need to repeat what I told #6? genius!
Reply
bizarre_ftw
| 21
It would seem so
Reply
oneleggedbeauty
| 0
Ahem. From what I understood, he was turned off by her, therefor she should probs go down on him in a different was maybe being more sexy less memory filled
Reply
happymelon
| 0
Were you born an idiot, or was it a gradual evolution?
Reply
20jetsgo
| 3
So your the: "pro of blow"...lol haha
By
fajitaswan
| 0
what's wrong with that guy..seriously lolz
By
divadro102
| 16
Men have emotions too. Shit happens. Make him feel better
Reply
sematariux
| 7
She was trying...
Reply
keshav97
| 0
I thiink he was talking to the ppl saying the guy was a jerk? but yea I agree
Reply
22cute
| 17
Yes, but to be thinking of the ex instead of enjoying the efforts of his here & now girlfriend is selfish and pointless.
He can have that emotion alone.
He can have that emotion alone.
Reply
ericb8272
| 2
A bj should make anybody feel better
Reply
divadro102
| 16
Unless said BJ by ex-sweetheart was terrible enough to guarantee a flacid penis
By
MrBoredGuy
| 1
Who cries when they're about to get a bj... You probably bit him
Reply
otb113
| 7
his poor Jim Dangle...
Reply
wordnerd42
| 0
She bit just like whatsherface..
-sob-
-sob-
By
kbt13
| 0
Jealous?
Reply
danielreader22
| 4
You said the same thing on the other FML. Which also didn't make sense. So please shut the fuck up.
Reply
testbug321
| 3
The pain feels good ;)
Reply
kbt13
| 0
ok