Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML
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Top comments
By
ClassyCommando
| 13
Calcium gives him strong boners.
By
FortuneCookie3
| 1
maybe he could suck the blockage out.
COMMENTS
By
ClassyCommando
| 13
Calcium gives him strong boners.
Reply
WCARlover
| 34
It's funny cause bones.
Reply
DanFML91
| 0
Your name fit your comment perfectly. Straight to the point like a commando with a slight classiness in delivery. Well done lol
Reply
kingsley_fml
| 8
@20: Only a bonehead wouldn't get that joke...
Reply
iDaniel525
| 8
I don't get the joke at all, but I still got a boner.
Reply
CheckItOutItsYou
| 7
I'm not really sure this a joke, just seems like advice to me
Reply
WCARlover
| 34
Good one 23
Reply
lebronesque73091
| 12
Good luck explaining that to be your parents.
Reply
taytay6510
| 6
Hahahah! 1- Your joke sure tickled my funny bone! Silly goose. ;)
Reply
WCARlover
| 34
I realized it sounded like I was being sarcastic when I said good one to 23 but I wasn't..
Reply
faithxoxox
| 1
You never go commando in another man's fatigues!
Reply
changesinme
| 0
Get him a cow before he clog up your other gland
Reply
starburst7596
| 14
I see what you did there...
Reply
bylliam
| 0
Haha 20's just getting torn a new one today
Reply
waterpool
| 0
Your retarded
Reply
dogpfcorn
| 11
^buzz kill
Reply
idefka
| 33
WCARlover, stop, you not helping youtlr case.
By
FortuneCookie3
| 1
maybe he could suck the blockage out.
Reply
bananabuttercup
| 8
It doesnt quite work that way.
Reply
RainbowHeadache
| 2
Actually it does.
Comes out looking about like a grain of rice.
The more you know.
Comes out looking about like a grain of rice.
The more you know.
Reply
DreBeezy
| 9
Well maybe you could do the same thing to him !!! Wait......
Reply
CareFace
| 16
By mammary, it's breast he suck tit out..
Reply
DryHumor
| 4
Yum. Lumpy breastmilk?
Reply
AlaskanEskimo34
| 0
Give him blue balls. I guarentee he won't be laughing.
Reply
princess151617
| 3
That's gross
By
flakitaa22
| 0
Is it wrong that this turned me on?
Reply
GoW_Chick
| 14
No, no it's not.
Reply
thaCODgod
| 4
no
Reply
ClassyCommando
| 13
Anyone else a little surprised there haven't been a whole heap of "pics or it didn't happen" comments?
Reply
iDaniel525
| 8
Pics or it didn't happen.
Reply
takrushi
| 4
It's not because you said it on the Internet. We are all perfectly sane people here ;)
Reply
ibebrandy
| 4
No, no its not ;)
Reply
G0v3nat0r
| 7
I'm jealous of OP's boyfriend
Reply
flakitaa22
| 0
172- &im jealous of OP
Reply
G0v3nat0r
| 7
179- we can fix that
Reply
flakitaa22
| 0
;)
By
Lythargic
| 0
You'll get over it.
Reply
katt_is_here
| 24
Dumbass.
By
Blackmail111
| 9
Wait wait wait! You let your boyfriend suck on your nips whenever he feels like (Which is most likely a lot)?
Reply
GoW_Chick
| 14
Ever hear of foreplay?
Maybe they just went a little overboard with it
Maybe they just went a little overboard with it
Reply
heyred
| 11
You need to study your own anatomy, sir.
Reply
bioboy725
| 10
#50, I find it funny that you think too much head would "suck"
Reply
extradorkyloser
| 4
Welllll, it is kind of hot. An unfortunate, rare scenario. The real FML is that he's a major jerk.
Reply
Isaac_The_Man
| 0
Get him a cow.
Reply
Blackmail111
| 9
I sense more pain coming for OP. First the tits are out of the way so he moves on to the vigina which = A trip to the gynocologist. After that he moves onto the ass which = A rectal exam. Finally he'll get to the mouth which will = A trip to the dentist. As a last resort he might try...KNEE SEX
Reply
Tdevonner
| 0
140...I think all the people who were turned on by the post itself are now all leaving fml n goin to porn thanks to ur play by play of endless clit sucking, butt fucking, n cum swallowing...n if they werent clicking over before they are now! not speaking of myself tho.. ahem excuse me...
By
Commander223
| 9
That's hot.
Reply
LiyIa_fml
| 8
I feel like, I've recently seen this comment before... Oh wait... I have. You lazy bum.
Reply
JustOhSoLovely
| 6
But his picture goes with it better
Reply
Commander223
| 9
So I get called a bum by using the same joke twice..? Hahaha. Both the homeless man fapping and this situation work well with the comment.
By
SRabbit
| 11
That suckles :P Seriously though that is unfortunate for you but at least it seems he is rather into you.
Reply
Poser1337
| 5
Well, doesn't THAT 'suck'?
By
supimnyancat
| 9
You must have some nice titties.
By
kingsley_fml
| 8
Wow, he sounds like such a boob.
Reply
CheckItOutItsYou
| 7
that comment is tits
Reply
kingsley_fml
| 8
That's the breast reply I've seen so far...
Reply
katt_is_here
| 24
The beast reply in recent mammary.
Reply
DryHumor
| 4
Such a puntastic thread. K
Reply
menechiann
| 0
Tits a lovely day
Reply
anonymoustravis
| 0
This is the breast thread ever!
Reply
ClassyCommando
| 13
Until you fuck tit up ^
By
Meowingtons500
| 18
Perhaps OPs significant other had a inadequate childhood due to being bottlefed as a wee little gaffer. Possibly he just wants the natural nipple feel he never got. Or he likes your titties. Or both.
Reply
missy73
| 3
Not all ppl who don't get breastfed have obsession with boobs. Think he's just obsessed wit them
Reply
Meowingtons500
| 18
Yeah. I think so also.
Reply
lishy1311
| 0
I just think he is foreplaying..