Kids: Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty....

By Overflow - 16/08/2009 21:05 - United States

Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty. I had to pee, and thought maybe she would learn by watching me use it. Everything was going well, until I realized that I had a long pee. So long that it overfilled her potty all over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 253

You deserved it 63 113

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/02/2015 04:12 - United States

Today, in an attempt to potty train my 2-year-old, I sat her on the toilet and waited for several minutes. I finally gave up and lifted her off the toilet just in time for her to pee on my new shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 878

You deserved it 5 840

So pissed

By soaked - 25/02/2013 19:16 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 553

You deserved it 9 078

Well done sweetie

By Mommy - 29/09/2010 22:47 - United States

Today, my daughter watched a potty training video on Sesame Street. In the middle of the video, she got up and ran to her potty to practice. She then announced, "All done!", and proudly closed the lid to her potty. She then immediately stood on top of it and peed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 497

You deserved it 3 670

By fired - 13/05/2012 06:26 - United States - Portland

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 662

You deserved it 46 970

By subtweetqueen - 09/09/2016 04:18 - United States - Santa Clarita

Today, the 3-year-old I nanny wanted to prove to me that he was tall enough to pee standing up in front of the toilet. When he realized he actually was tall enough, he got excited and misdirected his stream, covering himself, his brother, and me in urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 508

You deserved it 1 231

By Disgruntled - 16/03/2016 12:01 - United States - East Lansing

Today, my 2-year-old daughter started showing signs of understanding the potty training concept. She announced to my mother-in-law that she needed to go potty, only to be flatly told, "No, you don't." So she crapped herself. Now it's going to take forever to train her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 138

You deserved it 1 293

By Anonymous - 09/11/2011 21:52 - United States

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 515

You deserved it 24 620

Potty drama

By NeverEndingBathtime_ - 03/08/2017 20:00

Today, my two year-old is being potty trained. He got the gist of it and actually did #1 and #2 in the potty and after our little celebratory dance, I went to get him a cookie (which took me two seconds). I come back to see him covered in shit and pee because he tried to go empty the potty himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 735

You deserved it 1 085

By peepants - 04/06/2019 14:00

Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 208

You deserved it 314

Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 1 378

banana2022 4

Monday 17 August 2009 1:49

You didn't think to show her by peeing in a big kids' toilet? YDI for that genius idea.

outofmyelement 0

Monday 17 August 2009 1:53

eww, you used a toddler potty? you couldnt just use a toilet?

Comments

flygirlnene 0

Monday 17 August 2009 15:42

What does FTW mean?

lllo45 0

Monday 17 August 2009 19:03

FTW *For The Win*

spamme 0

Monday 17 August 2009 15:47

this post is great!

deaditegirl 0

Monday 17 August 2009 16:05

And you couldn't have stopped your flow? Learn some bladder control. YDI.

fml131996 0

Monday 17 August 2009 16:30

ppl shes a girl she sits down when peeing she cant see like a guy when peeing give her a break just because she did a stupid move doesnt mean shes stupid and to u #125 the only way she could have stoped if she felt it on her butt or she has and eye comming out of her vagaina

wuteva 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:05

what a dumb ass.. i have 3 little girls and the COMMON SENSE thing to do would go on the REAL toilet and tell her 'see you have to do pee pee on your potty/toilet like i do with mine.... like a big girl!!' YOU COMPLETELY DESERVED IT!! oh and uh...learn to stop peeing when needed

nike1 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:51

This can't possibly be true? Why didn't u just stop?

420bliss 0

Monday 17 August 2009 18:36

aren't those potties pretty deep?

kacie_fml 0

Monday 17 August 2009 19:44

hm. i cant stop in the middle of peeing. i can understand how this happened, but i cant understand why youd pee on a kid potty though.

GriefBacon 0

Monday 17 August 2009 19:52

You're not supposed to go in HER potty to show her how it's done. You're supposed to go in YOUR potty.

CannibalGuy 0

Monday 17 August 2009 20:25

I'm surprised that not that many people have mentioned that, you know, it IS possible to stop peeing. Why didn't you just STOP when you realised what was going to happen? And don't say 'I can't do that' because it's the SAME MUSCLES that you use to prevent yourself from peeing whenever there's anything in your bladder.