Kids: Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty....

By Overflow - 16/08/2009 21:05 - United States

Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty. I had to pee, and thought maybe she would learn by watching me use it. Everything was going well, until I realized that I had a long pee. So long that it overfilled her potty all over. FML

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You deserved it 63 113

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/02/2015 04:12 - United States

Today, in an attempt to potty train my 2-year-old, I sat her on the toilet and waited for several minutes. I finally gave up and lifted her off the toilet just in time for her to pee on my new shoes. FML

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So pissed

By soaked - 25/02/2013 19:16 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML

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You deserved it 9 078

Well done sweetie

By Mommy - 29/09/2010 22:47 - United States

Today, my daughter watched a potty training video on Sesame Street. In the middle of the video, she got up and ran to her potty to practice. She then announced, "All done!", and proudly closed the lid to her potty. She then immediately stood on top of it and peed. FML

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You deserved it 3 670

By fired - 13/05/2012 06:26 - United States - Portland

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

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You deserved it 46 970

By subtweetqueen - 09/09/2016 04:18 - United States - Santa Clarita

Today, the 3-year-old I nanny wanted to prove to me that he was tall enough to pee standing up in front of the toilet. When he realized he actually was tall enough, he got excited and misdirected his stream, covering himself, his brother, and me in urine. FML

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You deserved it 1 231

By Disgruntled - 16/03/2016 12:01 - United States - East Lansing

Today, my 2-year-old daughter started showing signs of understanding the potty training concept. She announced to my mother-in-law that she needed to go potty, only to be flatly told, "No, you don't." So she crapped herself. Now it's going to take forever to train her. FML

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You deserved it 1 293

By Anonymous - 09/11/2011 21:52 - United States

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

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Potty drama

By NeverEndingBathtime_ - 03/08/2017 20:00

Today, my two year-old is being potty trained. He got the gist of it and actually did #1 and #2 in the potty and after our little celebratory dance, I went to get him a cookie (which took me two seconds). I come back to see him covered in shit and pee because he tried to go empty the potty himself. FML

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You deserved it 1 085

By peepants - 04/06/2019 14:00

Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML

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Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

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You deserved it 1 378

banana2022 4

Monday 17 August 2009 1:49

You didn't think to show her by peeing in a big kids' toilet? YDI for that genius idea.

outofmyelement 0

Monday 17 August 2009 1:53

eww, you used a toddler potty? you couldnt just use a toilet?

Comments

she_wolf 0

Monday 17 August 2009 4:20

two words: kegel. exercises. you should be able to stop and start the flow at will. unless you're loose.

RuralNinja 0

Monday 17 August 2009 4:20

How about you stop, did you ever think about that?

Prendergast 0

Monday 17 August 2009 4:40

nice show the innocent child that beautiful scene

laffalot53 0

Monday 17 August 2009 4:42

u teach ur kid 2 b potty-trained wen SHE'S ready, not u

DameGreyWulf 0

Monday 17 August 2009 5:01

Well folks, after experiencing my neighbour's child, I think I must disagree with the "when the child is ready" argument. My neighbour's child went to school, five years old, was still in diapers. The SCHOOL had to train him, because the parents wouldn't because "it just upset him too much."

shelbysue282 0

Monday 17 August 2009 5:03

Um...the body can only hold, on average, 12oz. of urine. so...this is wayy off. i donno if i believe this one. but other then that ....its pretty funny =D

whoopsies_1 0

Monday 17 August 2009 5:06

lol id prob do the exact same thing with my son haha whoops!

birds_fml 7

Monday 17 August 2009 5:19

Your kid will potty train himself/herself when he/she is tired of being wet. Keeping them in "training pants" keeps them from being wet and uncomfortable, and they're not going to want to stop whatever they're doing to go use the potty. You're going to have to bite the bullet and put them in underwear, and let them wet themselves. They'll figure it out real quick then.