116

Today, I walked into my house with a couple of friends and I saw my girlfriend doing laundry. I jokingly asked her if she had time to do a load of mine as well. She scoffed and said, "Yeah babe, I'll gladly do your laundry... The same day you learn to wipe properly." FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 13 February 2014 12:43 /
Add a comment
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account Sign in
Top comments
Comments
Reply
  mb2_native  |  15

I'm 22 and last year due to the famous DQ Blizzard, also being lactose intolerant, I shit myself. It happened on the step of my girlfriends house in front of her mother. I had to wait until her little brother came out of the bathroom. My girlfriend cleaned my clothes and cleaned the floor on the way to the bathroom (disgusting, yes)... Safe to say she can handle my shit haha an FML by itself, but the point is your girlfriend can't handle yours LOL

Reply
  ajh1551  |  14

Unlike Minaj... you should never listen to that.

Reply
  mb2_native  |  15

That was suppose to be a comment, not a reply. But FYL OP

Reply
  mb2_native  |  15

#62, I forgot to mention I had lactaid pills, maximum dosage. I'm so lactose intolerant that they didn't work. It was embarrassing as hell when it happened, but I find it's funny now :p and it was a mini chocolate fudge blizzard.. A mini.. With the max amount of pills and did not help whatsoever.

Reply
  mb2_native  |  15

And plus, who in the fuck.. Could resist the temptations of delicious ice cream? I only eat it when I plan on not being busy and close to a toilet LOL Burning ring of fire ain't got shit on me when I have ice cream haha

Reply
  jazzy_123  |  20

That happens more than you'd guys think... when my sister went to Mexico to visit her in laws, she had to learn to squat and go bathroom outside behind a bush because they didn't have a bathroom (they're super poor) and since my sister is fat she couldn't support herself to reach and wipe... well my brother in law loves her sooooooo much he wiped her ass!!! I would never let my bf or anyone do that! I mean unless I was old, or handicapped or something... It's ok if you guys thumb me down though, its a true and disgusting story haha

Reply
  CallMeMcFeelii  |  13

Taking a deuce while squatting is something everyone who hunts learns to do, that's quite normal. Getting someone else to wipe your ass, well that's a new one to hear. Now totally exploding your bowels into your poor, poor undergarments, that's just sad. I've even shit alongside freeways to avoid said situation. But I will not shit my pants. No, no, no.

Reply
  Nastorrian  |  11

@71: "unless I was old, or handicapped or something..." our youth ladies and gentlemen.

Reply
  Setareh23  |  34

#11: Yours was a rare (and unfortunate) accident. The FML seems to imply that he never wipes properly. There's a difference between a girlfriend who helps her boyfriend clean up a rare and embarrassing mess, and a girlfriend who has to constantly clean up shit which can easily be avoided.

Reply
  purebliss_fml  |  19

That sounds like an accident. When you wash your boyfriends shitty undies day in and day out your sympathy kind of turns to disgust... It's not that hard to wipe properly boys! Skiddies are for kiddies.

Reply
  jazzy_123  |  20

83, what?? have you never been to a home? a lot of old people can't do much for themselves anymore and have helpers. Ever been to a hospital? same thing. It has nothing to do with the youth.

Reply
  cleopad1  |  3

So let me get this straight, #11: you're declaring the validity of your relationship based on whether or not your girlfriend can clean up your lactose intolerance induced mess after you stupidly decided to eat ice cream on a date to her house? And seeing as it was her house and the fact that you mentioned SHE cleaned your clothes and her floors, did you actually help? Because it looked to me as though you were bragging about how she did all the cleaning while you presumably just stood there xP

Reply
  Zazoo1995  |  22

"Jokingly" .. Ok, yeah, I totally believe you! It's not like you're trying to make yourself look like the victim when you're obviously a lazy sexist cunt... No way, Jose! Not with those cute cheeks!

Reply
  justagirl1998  |  10

That's nasty..

Reply
  jazzy_123  |  20

I read this thing that used the term fart art XD haha

By  baseballdude1283  |  18

Well, that was not an amazing image

Reply
  onlychildFTW  |  33

I use those huggies clean team wipes. XD they work great and I like them a lot more. Don't judge me! Lol. If he went to diapers imagine the cleaning needed for that. Eeek.

Similar
Loading data…