Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML
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By
OEsEben
| 0
if i could do this i would dump my girlfriend and never leave my house.
By
MisterJD
| 0
Gravity - you fought the law, and the law won.
COMMENTS
By
OEsEben
| 0
Too many negative votes, comment buried.
Show the comment
Reply
charlene_fml
| 0
thats mean dude
Reply
xX_LilSammie_Xx
| 4
Would you not be considered gay for sucking a dick, even your own?
Reply
ljbgamer
| 1
No, it would be considered masterbation.
Reply
blake204
| 0
No it's considered gross and seriously wrong.
Reply
nightslayer
| 6
i dont get why any guy says this, i would never suck my own dick cause thats just fucked up
Reply
hfslkp47012759
| 28
Wow, I wish I loved myself that much. Relationships are honestly awesome, though...You're willing to give up intimacy, a cuddle buddy, and a best friend? Being able to pleasure myself orally would pale in comparison.
By
Pop_and_Pixels
| 0
Lilu01's right, it is possible... if you have surgery to have a couple of your ribs removed or are hung like a horse.
Reply
Trav42
| 0
u would know......lol jk
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klynhunter
| 0
nah, it's totally possible if it big and flexible enough. google it.
Reply
LacrosseChick97
| 0
Somewhere up in the sky, Newton is laughing and saying I told you so. :P
Reply
mjcurreri198
| 0
I want to do it!
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Indatshirt
| 15
Aha, you fill me with happiness my sweet walrus.
Reply
gatorclay97
| 28
Disregard #150, you really don't want to Google that...
By
MisterJD
| 0
Gravity - you fought the law, and the law won.
Reply
chelseadaggers
| 0
Wooo clash quote. =]
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eastmanwolf
| 0
The Clash didn't write that song.
By
NotSprinkles
| 0
I have been able to do it....couldnt do much, but did a little bit, didnt do much for me though since I was the one doing it, its like rubbing your own back, it doesnt feel as good to do it yourself...
Reply
Rach_star
| 0
You make me feel sick
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CurlyHairGuy
| 0
Like women dont try to lick their own vag
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inconvienentgurl
| 0
they dont...if u wont use a man u got fingers...y would u lick ur own? guys have problems o.0
O.P. GET A GIRL!! buy 1 if u have to ;)
O.P. GET A GIRL!! buy 1 if u have to ;)
Reply
wtfjusthappened1
| 0
no, we dnt, cause its sick, yuck
Reply
mjcurreri198
| 0
that's really talented and hottt, how big is ur junk?
Reply
gatorclay97
| 28
It's more like masturbation... It's not really gay...
By
Inkspell
| 2
wait-wtf? why is barely anyone messing with this guy about an attempt at giving himself a blowjob, that's...friggen disgusting..wth? some of you even ask how to do it and ..wtf?!
Well.. i'm only 15..so i woudn't know..but jebus guys, what the blazing balls.
Well.. i'm only 15..so i woudn't know..but jebus guys, what the blazing balls.
Reply
peachykeen13
| 0
ur 15 nd u don't jack off? I'm a girl but my guy friends hav admitted to masturbating since 7th grade. it used to gross me out but whatever floats their boats I guess...
Reply
PenultimateTaco
| 14
Don't tell me you've never tried it, or though about it before. Because every male over the age of 13 has. Fact.
Reply
shinxanta
| 21
Never done it, because it's stupid as hell!
By
tiki_92090
| 0
Seriously watch Nip/Tuck the episode Manny Skerritt.
Hilarious. Goes along the lines of what happened to you; only he succeeded.
Hilarious. Goes along the lines of what happened to you; only he succeeded.
By
FunnyGuy_fml
| 0
I used to be able to lick the head, but the best I've ever gotten is just a quick little suck on the head- nothing to blow a load over
there's a competition at this camp my friend goes to every year- whoever wins is declared the owner of the longest penis
there's a competition at this camp my friend goes to every year- whoever wins is declared the owner of the longest penis
Reply
skizza_fml
| 3
makes sense wouldn't he be most flexible not owner of the biggest dick? if you wanna know whose is biggest just whip it out and examine save trying to blow yourself off
Reply
gatorclay97
| 28
That camp... It seems slightly gay...
By
runmymouth
| 0
#16, just by your AGE you're obviously not qualified to make much commentary on this, and your comment proves it.
As to the OP- better luck next time, fella.
As to the OP- better luck next time, fella.
By
citylights
| 0
HAHAHAHA @ #4 and #21
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Nabee143
| 3
You ARE #21... Did I miss something here?
By
Boo_hoo
| 0
Lol...Too Much Nip/Tuck!!! =P